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Cat Forum / General Topics / May 2006JRR Tolkien and Cats
Hi. My amateur dramatics group is working on an adaptation of JRR Tolkien's "The Queen of Baruthel's Cats" for an experimentalist piece we intend to travel with in the summer. We've got the script, actors, sets, and scheduling all lined up, but what we're looking for just now is some spare cats. Each play (and there's going to be a total of around 15, maybe 20, depending on audience interest) will use up about 30 or so cats, so we're looking for a very good, reliable supplier. The main feature of the production will be the famous (or should I say, infamous) scene where the cats all get torn to pieces by the vicious war-dog belonging to the invading General, Grubb. The dog - played by a rotweiller called Simon (he's got a spiked collar, and everything) - has been trained to the role, and so the cats won't suffer all that much as Simon is very good, and quick, at what he does. If anyone knows of any cat-farms, cat-orphanages, unwanted-pets centres, old cats homes, stray centres, or anywhere that can be depended upon to produce a good, steady supply of cats, please get in touch with the email address on our website. We will, of course, also appreciate any cat donations from sole providers. Thanks. - 'Tolkien in the Park' Productions Ltd. > Hi. My amateur dramatics group is working on an adaptation of JRR Tolkien's > "The Queen of Baruthel's Cats" for an experimentalist piece we intend to [quoted text clipped - 20 lines] > > - 'Tolkien in the Park' Productions Ltd. Suggestion: Have him practice on you. MLB "mlbriggs" <mlbriggs@nospam.com> you a feeding a troll ML > > "mlbriggs" mlbriggs@xmission wrote > > > > Suggestion: Have him practice on you. MLB > > you a feeding a troll ML You a feeding him too Matthew AKA NMR. You a twit. Heh! >> > "mlbriggs" mlbriggs@xmission wrote >> > [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > > You a feeding him too Matthew AKA NMR. You a twit. Heh! So now there are three of us! MLB > > > > "mlbriggs" mlbriggs@xmission wrote > > > > [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > > So now there are three of us! MLB Jesus H. Christ! You're an idiot, MLBriggs! Aintcha! > > > > > "mlbriggs" mlbriggs@xmission wrote > > > > > [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > > Jesus H. Christ! You're an idiot, MLBriggs! Aintcha! > Hi. My amateur dramatics group is working on an adaptation of JRR > Tolkien's "The Queen of Baruthel's Cats" for an experimentalist piece > we intend to travel with in the summer. On this NG (alt.fan.tolkien) you could get in *seriously* hot water for misspelling "Queen Berúthiel", if that was whom you referred to. Voron. > > Hi. My amateur dramatics group is working on an adaptation of JRR > > Tolkien's "The Queen of Baruthel's Cats" for an experimentalist piece > > we intend to travel with in the summer. > > On this NG (alt.fan.tolkien) you could get in *seriously* hot water > for misspelling "Queen Berúthiel", if that was whom you referred to. Yep - that sure was whom I was referring to, Voron / Raven / jonlennart.beck.god. You bet. That Queen Bartholemew, or whatever the f.ck she's called. I know where you're coming from on this. There's nothing that scrapes my scrotum like some nutjob that comes on to alt.fan.tolkien and misspells some minor canonical character, the bastard. Damn them. Damn them all to Hell. Damn their eyes. Damn their britches! I wonder - do you have any specifics regarding the temperature of the said water? In degrees centigrade, if you will. Thanks. - 'Tolkien in the Park' Productions Ltd. >> Hi. My amateur dramatics group is working on an adaptation of JRR >> Tolkien's "The Queen of Baruthel's Cats" for an experimentalist piece [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > water for misspelling "Queen Berúthiel", if that was whom you > referred to. I liked the reference to Grubb. Wasn't that a hobbit? As for the "made-up" name of "Tolkien in the Park", I think that is actually the name of a genuine production company - just shows the perils of poorly-researched satire! :-) Oh, and failing to make something out of the "nine black [cats] and one white" bit! I mean, _30_ cats? Insupportable! The standards of trolling are falling to all-time lows! No good for me. I'm pretty sure my Big Mama would slap the sh*t out that dog and make him cry. > Hi. My amateur dramatics group is working on an adaptation of JRR Tolkien's > "The Queen of Baruthel's Cats" for an experimentalist piece we intend to > travel with in the summer. You spelled Beruthiel wrong. > > Hi. My amateur dramatics group is working on an adaptation of JRR > > Tolkien's "The Queen of Baruthel's Cats" for an experimentalist piece > > we intend to travel with in the summer. > > You spelled Beruthiel wrong. No no no. I spelled it "B...a...r...u...t...h...e...l". Which is the incorrect spelling. It *should* have been spelled "B...e...r...u...t...h...i...e...l". "Wrong" (w...r...o...n...g), when spoken, comes out as "wrong", which is wrong. Doesn't sound anything like "Beruthiel", unlike "Baruthel", which kind-of does, in a way, especially if you say it quickly, or when drunk/stoned. In message <news:s8bm60evt2ut0gj.280420060441@Tolkien_in_the_Park> "Gorbag O'Sheite" <baggie {AT} bagman {DOT} com> enriched us with: <snip> > No no no. I spelled it "B...a...r...u...t...h...e...l". Which is > the incorrect spelling. [...] There once was an Olog in AFT A master of that noble craft 'Baruthel I spell not Berúthiel, but spelling it "wrong" would be daft' It is good to see that good trolling hasn't disappeared alltogether ;)  SignatureTroels Forchhammer Valid e-mail is <t.forch(a)email.dk> What is worse than a troll? More Troels . . . > <snip> > [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > not Berúthiel, > but spelling it "wrong" would be daft' My heart is warmed by your appreciative words Though some may have formed (the ridiculous turds) The notion that trouble I parse Well, they can kiss my arse. > It is good to see that good trolling hasn't disappeared alltogether ;) Your wish is my command, brother-in-arms! Ahem ...... {cough} ...... "It is good to see that good trolling hasn't disappeared". . . . . The joke - if such there be - only works, of course, if everyone who's reading this (ie those that aren't pretending to have *plonked* me) say it at the same time. Yes. OK. So the joke should have stayed in the movie 'Airplane'. Sue me! - 'Tolkien in the Park' Productions Ltd. >In message <news:s8bm60evt2ut0gj.280420060441@Tolkien_in_the_Park> >"Gorbag O'Sheite" <baggie {AT} bagman {DOT} com> enriched us with: [quoted text clipped - 12 lines] > >It is good to see that good trolling hasn't disappeared alltogether ;) How could it as long as you are a participant of these newsgroups?* ;-) Morgoth's Curse * (For those who are slow of wit, this is a pun based on his name.) > > <snip> > > [quoted text clipped - 13 lines] > ;-) > * (For those who are slow of wit, this is a pun based on his name.) Eh? What the f.ck do you mean? "Troels Forchhammer" . . . . "Troels" . . . . Oh! Right! I see! "Troels" sounds like "Trolls"! Yes! Ha-ha! That's very good! I never "got" that! Cheers, mate! You're a pal! > Eh? What the f.ck do you mean? > "Troels Forchhammer" . . . . "Troels" . . . . Oh! Right! I see! "Troels" > sounds like "Trolls"! Yes! Ha-ha! That's very good! I never "got" that! > Cheers, mate! You're a pal! Is it pronounced "Trolls"... or "Tray-ls"? HMMMM? I thought so! Or possibly "Trül" (no s. leave the s right out!) or "Trølls"? Or "Cøøts" (Canadian for cats)? Or "AAAAaaa--argh"? In message <news:h9n552dc2ejb91e6ic2p912q0hl324ck2m@4ax.com> "Morgoth's Curse" <morgothscurse2002@nospam.yahoo.com> enriched us with: <snip> >> It is good to see that good trolling hasn't disappeared >> alltogether ;) > > How could it as long as you are a participant of these > newsgroups?* ;-) :) I hope you saw the .sig . . . On the . . ., not 'serious', but perhaps less frivolous side, it's a pun that only works with an English pronunciation -- in Danish it's two syllables with he 'o' pronounced rather like French "eau" and the 'e' /almost/ a schwah (and of course the 'r' is back-tongue rather than trilled). I realise that most you have been on usenet long enough to know what I might mean by 'good trolling', but for those few who haven't, I mean the kind of troll that knows the subject matter well enough to be humorous about it and whose posts tend to point out when the rest of us are taking ourselves a bit to seriously. SignatureTroels Forchhammer Valid e-mail is <t.forch(a)email.dk> Taking fun as simply fun and earnestness in earnest shows how thouroughly thou none of the two discernest. - Piet Hein, /The Eternal Twins/ > <snip> > [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > > It is good to see that good trolling hasn't disappeared alltogether ;) I was going to say they missed out the accent - but then I saw that you and Raven supplied it for them. And I woudl call this the Usenet version of "street theatre", rather than trolling. To be called (successful) trolling in my book, you need someone to reply to the obvious bait and complain about the cats being torn to pieces. But no-one's done that yet, unless there is a surprise waiting for me downthread. > The dog - played by a rotweiller > called Simon (he's got a spiked collar, and everything) - has been trained > to the role, and so the cats won't suffer all that much as Simon is very > good, and quick, at what he does. Somebody rent this guy an ocelot. Sean_Q_ > > The dog - played by a rotweiller > > called Simon (he's got a spiked collar, and everything) - has been trained > > to the role, and so the cats won't suffer all that much as Simon is very > > good, and quick, at what he does. > > Somebody rent this guy an ocelot. I imagine that'd cos' alot. What about a hippopotamus? He'd tear it from top to bottom-us. ("An Ocelot!" "It's only a model") |
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