First things first:  a cat should never be picked up by the scruff of its
neck, as its mother would.  It's safe, of course, with a tiny kitten, but
after about 8 wks old this practice should be stopped.  This is because,
once a cat starts to put on weight, there would be too much strain on the
spine.  However, in an adult cat, it is perfectly acceptable - and very
useful - to restrain a cat by the scruff of its neck, provided its weight is
fully supported on the ground or your lap.

To pick up a cat safely and so that it feels secure, slip your arm under its
front legs so that your arm is around its chest.  Then slip your other arm
under its behind or rear legs (whichever is more comfortable) and gently
lift.  This is the way most vets pick up a cat because it puts no strain on
either the spine or stomach.  Sometimes, if I pick up a wriggly cat outside
(for its own safety), I lift in the above way, and then grip the rear legs
together.  This stops the cat from kicking, scratching or launching itself
into the very danger you were trying to avoid.   I only do this for the
duration of the risk.

Not all cats enjoy being picked up - certainly not to the same degree.
However, cats need to be handled and examined at regular intervals, so every
attempt should be made to ease handling.  I make sure all my cats are
over-handled and meet as many people as possible early on.  The sooner
handling, playing and petting commence, the easier life will be for you and
your cat.  I always talk to my cats when I pick them up .. I tell them why
I'm picking them up and that they are safe.  If they resist being picked up,
I pick them up anyway and tell them they need handling and that they can go
down soon.  If they behave well and gently, I praise them highly.  If they
continue to resist (wriggle or cry), I praise them with a caveat "you were a
good puss, considering you didn't want to be held".  As loony as it sounds,
the cats seem able to distinguish between the two forms of praise, and want
to do better.  To be honest, even if they don't want to do better, I persist
because I've learned the value of a well-handled, unstressed cat at the
vets, or during visitations at home from less understanding people.  It
certainly helps on Bonfire Night, when the poor critters are terrified
witless.  While handling, do a brief examination: check kitty's eyes, open
its mouth, look in its ears.  All this will get kitty used to being handled.
By all means add grooming to your handling and holding routine as this can
be very relaxing for a cat, *if started early enough*.
Indeed, one of my cats will lead me into my garden room and ask to be
brushed; we have a lovely purrry relationship.

Spider

I snatch them up quickly cradle them and say (you can leave when I am done
loving you) lol after hugs and kisses they can go... looking back at me and
talking ,they lead me to the treat container. This process works for us :-)
Jan

Sometimes I hold my cats between my teeth, like a
mama cat. There will be complete silence (ie no
response), to this post.