It's now a proven fact that it was not humans but cats that flew the
planes into the World Trade Center buildings.  This comes after years
of top level investigations by the Dept. of Homeland Secirity, the
FBI, and the CIA.  These cats were working for terrorists and
succeeded in killing thousands of innocent people.  

If you own cats, beware.   The U.S. government is watching you, and
your cat may be a suspect.  This is a very serious matter and not to
be taken lightly.  If you happen to be the owner of a terrorist cat,
you too are likely to be charged and imprisoned for these acts.
According to our studies, there are hundreds of cats invloved in the
Al Cata terrorism network, and they are located all over the United
States of America and elsewhere around the world.  

It is highly recommened that you interrogate any cat which you posess.
If your cat admits, or you suspect that your cat is involved with Al
Cata, please contact your local police and the FBI immediately.  

Sincerely,
The FBI