Umm yum yum :p

5 -- Misc. sh.t....Stick the cat in the Microwave (no, really) and
don't turn it on (yet) just let it sit there, and look through the
little see-through window...It should be scared as hell, since it's in
a really tight spot, can't move much at all...If you really want to
screw the f.cker, nuke it! Just nuke it for 20 seconds at a time...The
cat will start squirming at about 10 seconds (depending on the wattage
of the Microwave)...After about 30 seconds, the cat will definitely
have radiation poisioning, which will probably kill it within a month
or less. If you nuke it for a minute, you'll probably kill it,
depending on the size of the cat, the microwave cooks inside out, so
after a minute, it's intestines and lungs will be a little toasty,
maybe killing it, if not, probably sterilizing it or leaving it a slow
and terrible death. Of course, you can go "All-Out" if you REALLY
express rage for it, and can nuke it for 5 minutes...This is NOT for
the Squeamish....I DO know someone who did this, and saw it....It was
pretty f.cking gross, and being the cat hater I am, I still felt sorry
for it. In 30 seconds, it starts kicking and screaming and freaking out
(which brings me to the point, you gotta make sure the door can't be
opened, and you gotta make sure you don't want the microwave anymore).
In 1 minute, it was started to spaz like nothing you've ever seen
before, some blood was coming from it's mouth due to internal cuts the
Nuking did, all types of seisures and some last moans were following at
2 minutes. At about 2 and a half minutes, the cat was still alive, it's
pupils were dialated and it was twitching like someone stuck a
Electrolysis gun up it's a.s...At 3 minutes, it's almost dead...The
smell of the cat would make any mortician throw up, that's why I would
suggest alot of open windows and doors and some type of gas mask on.
The last two minutes it the cool part...Now that the f.cker is dead
(for good reason too) it's time to watch the fireworks...I think at
around 4 minutes, the cat started popping, it's eyeballs literally
popped out of it's sockets, and the blood started to ooze, not a pretty
sight..At about, 4 mins 15 seconds, it's fur starts to curl (although
it was already crispy) and at about 5 minutes, the whole microwave is
one big slaughterhouse. Which brings me to clean up...DON'T! I said
earlier, Nuke the cat in a microwave you no longer want to use (not to
mention the microwave is probably broken anyway). Just throw the
microwave away and chuckle off a couple laughs...Even take poloraids if
you want.