Go to a shelter and see the kitties. Maybe that will help.
I'm sorry you're hurting so much. When Gnarly (age 20)
died I hurt for so long. Two months after her death I
went to the shelter and found Cheeky. I knew I was
ready because I felt her reaching my heart. Nobody
can replace Samcat--but they are all wonderful in
their own ways. Somebody out there needs your help!
Somebody nothing like Samcat but with soft fur and a
sweet voice and bright eyes.

I'm very sorry about your cat and your grief.  Everyone is different.
I think if you are questioning whether you are ready that you probably
are not.

I've always had more than one cat since I've been an adult.  That way
I'll never be at zero.  Actually, we've had 3 or 4 for years now so we
always still have 2 when one has died.

I'll never forget any of my late kitties but I don't cry too often.  My
last one died 15 months ago and he was the one I was closest to...but
he lived to be nearly 18 so I tried to find solace in that and in the
fact that I don't think he suffered very much; I tried to avert that.

You might feel better by fall.  Sometimes having another one (or 2)
makes it easier.  They're not a replacement for the one you lost but
they are so cute in their own ways that it's hard to resist them.

Candace

I'm sorry for your loss and all that you've been through :(

I can't really say when you know you're ready, you just do.  I volunteer at
an animal shelter, and I see people come in at all different times after
losing a pet.  Some come in the next day, they just can't stand an empty
house.  For some people it's been months, but they leave the shelter crying
because they aren't ready.  When you feel up to it, start visiting shelters
and see how you react.  That's probably the best gauge.

Take care.

I had a beloved cat who had to be put down.  For years I had dreams
about that cat being alive again, and it was always a bummer to wake
up from those dreams.  He died in 1994, and I still miss him
sometimes.  

I would say force yourself to go to the shelter tomorrow.  A new cat
won't remove your grief, but it won't make it any worse, and face it,
the sooner cat vacancies get filled, the better for all the cats in
the system.

You have a lot on your plate..  I wish you well.

Charlie

This may sound weird, but I think your new cat will let you know. There
is probably a little cat out there that needs you, but maybe is not
quite ready.

When they are ready, you will find him or her.

Rhonda

It may take a while.  I used to 'see' my first cat out of the corner of
my eye, or think I heard her make her greeting noise for a couple of
months after she died.  Which really surprised me, 'cause I'm a pretty
matter-of-fact person. You never know...

I was lucky in that I had 2 cats at the time, so when my first cat
died, I was not cat-less.  Otoh, I knew I wanted to have a second cat
again, but it took me over a year before I was actually ready to adopt
a second one. Several years later, I adopted a 3rd cat - a neighborhood
stray.

So... when you're ready, you'll know.  I don't think you can guess
ahead of time with any real degree of accuracy when that time'll be, &
it seems to be different for everybody. And even different after the
deaths of different cats.

Cathy

Well, sometimes you don't get to choose. Some cat just comes into your life.
But the grief....you just live with it an it slowly gets to be less and less
periods of it. I still grieve for Grant, and now that Pearl has been
diagnosed with heart trouble (could be months or years. Gee, great) there
are some days I feel like giving up. I miss my cuddle bunny Grant. I love
the girls but he was the one that came and cuddled anytime I laid down. He
was my boy, my perfect gentleman. And yet, I don't think I'll ever be ready
for another until I don't get a choice. I do hope you consider it in a few
months because there are so many who need homes. But I hope the right one
comes to you.

It took me a coupe years to be able to talk about Fiona without
crying. I still do on rare occasions, but I can usally talk about her
and laugh now (It's been over 10 years).

I really think it varies - not just with the person, but with the pet,
and the experience with each. I grieved very badly for Fiona, and not
as much for Seusy, who died 11 months later. I actualluy grieved more
for Fiona on her one year anniversary than I did for Seusy only a
month after her death. It was strange because I really loved Seusy
too, and I felt very guilty. I think it was just a deeper relationship
with Fiona, and I honestly don't remember life before her since I got
her so young.

Jasper was a a sweet kitty who I only had for a few weeks, but his
death was so horrible that I really grieved badly, mostly at the
unfairness and horrible death. It will be 5 years this month, and I
still cry sometimes, especially if I think about that horrible night.
But I can also talk about him with fond memories and good lessons that
he taught me.

Maynard died only 6 weeks ago. Oddly, his death seems to have been the
easiest for me. But I think there are a few reasons for that.

I'm older and have gone through this a few times.
I learned from Jasper's death that I should never doubt my decision.

And probably the main reason:
I had 4 days to prepare for his death. The others were all acting fine
less than 24 hours before. So, I was suddenly faced with a loss that I
didn't expect anytime soon. In Maynard's case, I knew it was serious,
and that the treatment would only be postponing his death. I had hoped
to gain a few months of quality life, but I knew I was facing the end.
And I did a lot of crying before he died. I think I actually did most
of my grieving *with* him.

I did a lot of crying the day of, but after that, it has been
sporadic. And seems to depend on the memories I am thinking about. I
can go days of no crying, and then suddenly burst into tears over a
random thought. I can look at photos and smile. And I still find
myself saying two phrases "Good stuff, Maynard" and "Maynard did it."

I think it just happens when you are ready.

I got Kira about 8 months before Fiona died. I wasn't planning on it.
It just happened. Jasper was a surprise cat and died only a few weeks
later, so it was a very fast high and low. I did sort of get a kitten
a couple months later, but he was for my nephew.

I got Jay Jay last February with no intent to get another cat. And
Maynard died in May.

My dog was another story. I lost Seusy in April of one year and I
didn't want another dog right away. Then the calendars starting
hitting the stores, and I found myself looking at lots of sheltie
photos. I ended up waiting a full year before I did get another
sheltie, but she was well worth waiting for.

About two weeks before Maynard died, a lady came into my work place
with a kitty angel pin. I asked about it, as I had seen one once and
wanted to get one. Her cat was almost 19 and had just died. The vet
gave it to her. A few days later, she came in again and gave me a pin.
She had gone back to the vet and gotten another one.

I didn't see her again until yesterday. I told her about Maynard, and
she told me about her new kitty. She didn't want another kitty right
away, but this cat just showed up in her yard a week after her cat
died,  and he wanted in. So, she has another cat now.

I wouldn't rush it, but when the time is right, you'll either get the
itch to go find one, or one will find you.

I went through similar feelings of pain and grief after my first cat died at
the age of 20.  I found myself thinking of him day after day, and I would
constantly talk about him.  I also was trying to "wait awhile" before
getting another cat.  After two or three months (not sure of the time now
because that was so many years ago), I finally decided that I really needed
to get another cat.  By coincidence, Amber needed a home just at the time
that I had made that decision.  She was truly a little angel, and it is hard
to describe how she much she helped me work through the grieving process.
She was not a "replacement," just as Holly was not a replacement for her --  
in fact, that would be impossible.  However, she added another dimension to
my life, and I soon found that I was now able to look back on Raucher's life
and enjoy the memories instead of immersing myself in sadness.  I still
think of him frequently, and I keep a picture of him above my computer
(which you can see in one of the photos on my photo albums); but these are
now happy thoughts.

To sum up:  maybe you should consider getting another cat now instead of
waiting until fall.  You would be saving another life, and you would add
immeasurably to your own.

MaryL

Photo albums --
Duffy:  http://tinyurl.com/cslwf
Holly:  http://tinyurl.com/9t68o
Duffy and Holly together:  http://tinyurl.com/8b47e

You'll know when your ready when you feel its right with no hesitation.
Because you're asking, I don't think you're really ready right now.  I think
you may need a little more time to morn her and come to terms with her
passing.  You never really get through the grief- it just gets a little
easier to live with as time passes.

Hope this helps:

http://indigo.org/rainbow/

Phil

You'll know when your ready when you feel its right with no hesitation.
Because you're asking, I don't think you're really ready right now.  I think
you may need a little more time to morn her and come to terms with her
passing.  You never really get through the grief- it just gets a little
easier to live with as time passes.

Hope this helps:

http://indigo.org/rainbow/

Phil