I would say that you are doing just fine so far. He may be afraid of
your husband simply because he is male. If the abuser in the previous
home was a male...that would explain it. I would continue to let KitKat
work at his own pace. Sure you could try to lure him out. Perhaps with
food? But if he is not responsive, continue working on his pace as it
will likely take him a good amount of time to realize that he can trust
humans again. Some suggestions I have seen on this board before would
also include having your husband be the one to fill the food bowls and
let KitKat see him doing it. Then your husband should just walk away,
but hopefully KitKat would associate receiving the food FROM him and
start to loosen up. I think you are doing great! Thanks for giving
KitKat a new, loving home.

Pam

Is there a bed in the room? I sometimes think a sleeping human is
irresistable to a cat. What if hubby laid on the bed and read or napped? he
is such a cute little cat.

Patience.  Two weeks is but a blink of the eye in the recovery of a cat
who's been abused, feral, whatever.  They need to learn to trust again.

I'd say give him as many pets and cuddles as he will tolerate wherever
he'll tolerate them.  In a month or two, then re-evaluate.  But, really,
two weeks is nothing.

You're doing fabulous, BTW.  Gold star to your husband for hanging in
without getting any goodies for himself out of the deal (yet).  Was the
cat abused by a man, by any chance?

Priscilla

P.S.  Extra pets and cuddles for hubby as well?  ;-)

Sweet kitty.

Adam

Two of my cats took quite a long time to come around when we brought
them in.

BISCUIT took almost a year before she would come onto the bed and only
in the last month has felt bold enough to try and get into the middle.
It took her, I think, a good month before she would come out of her
hiding places and hang-out with the rest of us. She'd dart past you if
she felt she had suddenly been caught. Even now - if she hears the
slightest unfamiliar sound - she'll shoot away to investigate or hide.

MAGI took over six months to come around and now she is quite loveable
but only in the last month has taken to even lying on the bed.

The best thing about taking in older cats or kittens 'with a history'
is that they unravel themselves gradually to you as trust develops.
Every gesture they make towards you which is a positive change in
behaviour is a compliment to your care.

What is funny is the cats do it like it is no big thing, "Why are you
looking so surprised just 'cos I jump onto the bed? By the way can you
make a bit more space in the middle there? I'm a cat and I need to
stretch out."

I think now were I to adopt more cats, I'd pick the older cats -
because in them there is something of an adventure of mutual discovery
to be had.

The trick is to gradually seduce him with food (plenty!); a friendly
non-threatening presence (approach KITKAT from his eye level where
possible); a clean litter tray (which he sees you cleaning) and lots
of warm, soft furnishings!!!

Iain.H

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