If your daughter knows to leave the kitty alone until kitty comes to HER she
should be fine. Reading to feralish cats quietly sitting on the floor is a
great way to acclimate them, so your daughter could even particpate by
reading assignments and stuff to the kitty. Good luck!

Yes to the first question. No, but haven't tried to the second. My
former feral was plucked right out of my backyard. Very very feral
at the age of about 5-6 months old. I doubt she'd ever let herself
near a person from the way she acted, and still acts sometimes.
It's been almost 2 years and she's fine with me as long as I don't
try to pick her up, or move too fast around her. Company in the
house, and she's under the bed (unless she's hungry as I just found
out last week. lol A friend stopped by just as I had put dinner out
for the kitties and she hadn't had a bite yet. She braved her way
to the kitchen while trying to blend in with the carpet, for a
couple of mouthfuls before retreating back to the bedroom).  She's
been known to come out of hiding for only a few select guests, but
not many, and only after she knows they've been here a few times.
As far as affection goes, she is very lovable. To me.

I like Karen's suggestion - to have your daughter sit on the floor
and just ignore her. That is, if you think you want to try giving
the little feral a chance. Ignoring seems to be the key. :) I never
had a problem with my Bonnie attacking me once she got used to
being indoors, though at first she was very bitey and fighty. I had
to wear welders gloves to get her used to touch. I hope this helps
some. I tend not to try to give advice, but just some of my own
experience.

I have a ferally kitty, he came to me at about 6 months old as a foster.
He's a little over a year old now, and he will sit next to me, get on the
bed (but only when I'm under covers), and sits under my desk as I work.  I
can pet him at select times and only in two places in the house.  He purrs
like crazy when he's near me, but touching and definitely picking up is off
limits for the most part.  Some ferals do progress to full-fledged friendly
cats, but it takes a lot of work.  I would suspect with you having other
cats in the house, she will be more interested in them than any humans in
the house.

Our rescue group also usually says "no" to placing semi-ferals in homes with
children, as they may not react well to the commotion and noise that usually
come with kids.  However, we will meet the children too if the parents
really think they will be good with the cat.

In your post you say you "like the look of the cat".  I suggest you meet her
and really get an sense of her personality.  If you really, really want a
friendly cat, then this might not be the right cat for you.  If you want a
cat that will be a good friend to your cats, and that you can celebrate
small victories with (first time she sits next to you, eats in your
presence, all big steps to a recovering feral), then this may be your cat.

"I already have one hissy cat, and while I really like the look of this
one and would love to meet her, I'm concerned that this cat may not
come around (i.e., not fully attach to us). Has anyone had success in
raising an ex-feral kitty? Do any of them totally adjust to being with
people? Particularly, have they adjusted to kids -- or at least older
ones? I'd like a kitty that is at least potentially friendly! "

Okay. Honestly, I'm not sure. Two other cats and a kid is alot of
activity for a stressed cat to deal with, I'm not entirely sure that
you may not have as much trouble with the cat introductions as anything
else. Domestic cats do sometimes have reactions to semi-ferals and I
have heard hypotheses that they can sense the "wildness" and they worry
about their humans with this freaky new cat in the house! In my
experience, I adopted a year and a half old semi-feral to be a
companion to my year and a half old a while ago, and while it has
worked out, it was a pretty difficult and long introduction  That said,
my sweet baby was very, very frightened and while I've dealt with alot
of scaredy-cats, was really genuinely a rather extreme case. No reason
to assume this cat will have that long an adjustment time. But I do
think the shelter staff *are* a decent judge of the cat's personality
and they are warning you.

Basically it comes down to this. It probably will be fine in the end if
you make the effort and obviously that's a really wonderful thing to do
and the cat will be lucky to have found you. But you should go into it
prepared for several months of difficulty and probably a long-term and
gradual attachment to you rather than a sudden one. It may however in
the end prove to be one of the most rewarding things you'll ever do. I
think the hard-luck cats somehow do realize how very special you are :>

When you meet the cat, ask the shelter mgr if you can meet the cat in a
private room.  Not only former ferals, but almost all cats are at their
absolute worst in busy and noisy shelters and stores with a lot of other
cats and people and various noises.

In the room, let the cat get settled for a few minutes and let her come to
you.  Don't try to force yourself on her.  Even the most freindly cat could
become defensive if rushed or picked up too soon by a stranger. Also, some
cats just don't like to be held, but still love to snuggle and/or stay
close.

I'm concerned that this cat may not

I have two bonafide former ferals that I trapped and adopted at 6 and 8
months old.  Both adapted perfectly to indoor living with people and my
other cats.  All my cats have their favorite buddy that they like to suggle
with, but they all get along wonderfully.

Actually, ferals seem to adapt to other cats in the household more quickly
and easily than shelter cats because most feral come colonies and are
already used to forming relationships with other cats.

Go for it!

Best of luck.

Phil