Cat Forum / Health and Behavior / August 2004
Update on stray adoption. I think it's time to let Henry go
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Brian Link - 21 Aug 2004 02:02 GMT I guess I'm hoping someone will talk me out of it..
It's been almost three months now, and given the chance, Henry tears off after our little bengal, Louis. Louis is pretty beat up after the last attack, where they ended up under a bed and it took us a few moments to separate.
What options do I have? I guess I should start putting posters up seeing if anyone would like to adopt him. I'm a bit suspicious of the "no-kill" shelters..
Bah. Oh well, Henry might not have survived this long outdoors.
Don't you wish sometimes you could just sit down and have a sensible conversation with a cat?
Oh well
BLink
MacCandace - 21 Aug 2004 09:11 GMT << I guess I'm hoping someone will talk me out of it.. >>
I'll try to talk you out of it...mostly because I'm in the same situation you are, I guess, although it's been "only" 7 weeks here. I contemplated returning Marbles to his no-kill rescue for awhile but I just couldn't stand the thought of him being at someone else's home and them maybe not being as nice to him as we are. He's already lost one home. What if he goes to someone who is mean to him? He's such a sweet kitty to us, I just couldn't stand it. Even if we have to keep him separated forever, we are going to keep him.
I just worry about cats who are passed around...it seems like once a cat starts to be passed around that that is how their life usually goes until something icky happens to them. I have thought that if I had a really good friend who wanted a cat and who I could trust to be nice to him that I might part with him but, although I have a lot o really good friends, none of them want a cat. Do you have someone you know who could take him?
Have you tried medication?
Candace (take the litter out before replying by e-mail)
See my cats: http://photos.yahoo.com/maccandace
"One does not meet oneself until one catches the reflection from an eye other than human." (Loren Eisely)
Cat Protector - 21 Aug 2004 09:42 GMT I have to wonder how the OP introduced the two cats? If he just dumped them in a room and expected everything to be perfect right off the bat, I can see why they might not get along. Introducing cats is a slow process sometimes.
As for the no-kill shelters, some of them are terrific and really work hard to get felines adopted. When I rescued Icarus I was going to try and get him placed. Of course many of the rescues were full. One rescue worker even told me that the only way they would take him is if he got vet checked. Another said she'd take him if nobody else would but Icarus then attached himself to me and wouldn't let go so I didn't think it fair for him to go from one issue of abandonment to another where he was just dumped in a shelter. When I first found him he actually followed me. I have not seen this in any cat where they initially did that. Jade did it when she came to live here but that was after a couple of weeks.
Just like you I had concerns that if I got him to a shelter if he'd even be happy or end up in a better home. The last cat I rescued before Icarus actually did get a good home. I was told the people loved him. As for the passing the cat to a good friend theory, most of the time that will blow up in your face because they will hesitate or say no. In fact if your friends find a cat and they are not cat people, they'll usually ask the one who has one or two cats if they want another. I myself didn't count on three cats but they end up winning you over. Icarus at least has a better life now and he is safe.
> << I guess I'm hoping someone will talk me out of it.. >> > [quoted text clipped - 23 lines] > "One does not meet oneself until one catches the reflection from an eye other > than human." (Loren Eisely) Cathy Friedmann - 21 Aug 2004 16:57 GMT > << I guess I'm hoping someone will talk me out of it.. >> > [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > him? He's such a sweet kitty to us, I just couldn't stand it. Even if we have > to keep him separated forever, we are going to keep him. I really don't think you'll have to keep him separated forever; it's just going to take a long time. If Demelza eventually could accept (well, sort of accept!) Herrie, yours will eventually work out, too. She was a *mess* when Herrie was first let out into the house during the daytime: if she came anywhere near him, she'd pant like crazy, huddled up on a windowsill for example - totally freaked. She was so upset, she lost weight for a few months. She's now at her all-time high (a whopping 8? lb. - she's petite) though, & will lie down next to him to watch the squirrels out the front door, eats next to him...
Cathy
teri - 22 Aug 2004 03:19 GMT >I guess I'm hoping someone will talk me out of it.. > >It's been almost three months now, and given the chance, Henry tears >off after our little bengal, Louis. Louis is pretty beat up after the >last attack, where they ended up under a bed and it took us a few >moments to separate. Been there. At three months it was still constant stress in our house with Seamus attacking Jewel. I honestly can't tell you when things started to settle down, but it was more than 6 months I know that. He still has his moments, and this spring got bad again, but extreme diligence with the squirt gun attacks on him did the trick in two weeks. I do keep a baby gate on the steps so they are seperate when I am at work, but that is also because Jewel picks at her food all day, while Seamus eats everything in sight. I hope they can find peace, I remember your pictures and they look like a great family. I gave a lot of speeches about the meaning of family, respecting your sister, can't we all just get along... not sure how helpful it was in the long run. Teri
-L. : - 22 Aug 2004 07:44 GMT > I guess I'm hoping someone will talk me out of it.. > [quoted text clipped - 15 lines] > > BLink My cats have fought for 13 years. They tolerate each other most of the time. Sometimes you can't make them get along.
-L.
Karen Chuplis - 22 Aug 2004 16:02 GMT >> I guess I'm hoping someone will talk me out of it.. >> [quoted text clipped - 20 lines] > > -L. Pearl got into trouble last night for the first time in a long time when she hissed and pawed at Grant who was carefully walking by her a couple of feet away, purposely avoiding coming closer. I put her in the bedroom and she *knew* I was mad. Usually she tries knocking at the door right away but she didn't even peep. I let her out a few minutes later and she was perfectly behaved the rest of the night.
MacCandace - 22 Aug 2004 22:54 GMT << Usually she tries knocking at the door right away but she didn't even peep. I let her out a few minutes later and she was perfectly behaved the rest of the night. >>
I just had an incident here, too. After the last week of letting Marbles spend an hour out with the other 2, carefully watching him, it seemed as though he had learned not to chase or stalk. The other 2 still hide when he's out but watch him closely. He had been going up to them and just looking at them and walking away whereas before he would get all fluffed up and start to advance on them. I had been rewarding everyone after the nightly visits and feeling that some slight progress had been made.
Wrong! Today he was out, acting nicely, had looked at both of them and then gone about his business so I went back in the office, leaving them unattended for just a few minutes. Bam! Crash!!!!!! Shriek!!!! Hissssssss! The pounding footsteps of small, running beasts in my direction. It was Abbey, shrieking, being hotly pursued by Marbles. She dashed under this rack of clothes I have in the hall and he starts to head in after her. Now he's all fluffed up again. I grabbed him and tossed him in the bathroom for a timeout. Poor Abbey dashed out from under the clothes and went back to her original hiding place where she remains.
I know what precipitated the incident. The ironing board was up in the family room, as it usually is, since I can never seem to iron more than one article of clothing at a time. The cats love to lay on it anyway. It was knocked down with all the clothes that had been hanging on the side of it strewn all over the floor. I assume Marbles was up there and knocked it down, as sometimes happens. It fell against a table in the corner which is what Abbey had been hiding under, watching him. I imagine she thought Marbles did it on purpose and she dashed out in fear. Marbles cannot resist a running cat and he was probably freaked out from the clatter, too, so he did what seems to come naturally to him...and went after her. So now we've had yet another setback and will have to start from ground zero once again. She's horrified, Scottie came out to watch the festivities and also got all fluffed up and is currently back in hiding. Marbles is now back in his room after the timeout. He is being very quiet which is unusual for him. I know, absolutely, that he understands he is not to chase the other cats but I suppose he just couldn't resist this time. Sigh...
I guess I can't leave them unattended for even a second even if all seems okay. Now I leave on vacation in 4 days for a week leaving Tony alone with the monsters. I'm sure he will leve them out unattended more than I do...although not whiel he's at work or asleep, I don't think, but I can't really control what he does so it's kind of out of my hands. I could come home to a worse situation, a better situation, or the same situation.
Candace (take the litter out before replying by e-mail)
See my cats: http://photos.yahoo.com/maccandace
"One does not meet oneself until one catches the reflection from an eye other than human." (Loren Eisely)
Cheryl - 22 Aug 2004 23:09 GMT In the fine newsgroup "rec.pets.cats.health+behav", on 22 Aug 2004:
> I guess I can't leave them unattended for even a second even if > all seems okay. [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > my hands. I could come home to a worse situation, a better > situation, or the same situation. Candace, but you DID have some success! Even if there is regression afterwards, what happened with them even for a short time was PROgression! :)
 Signature Cheryl
Cathy Friedmann - 22 Aug 2004 23:27 GMT > In the fine newsgroup "rec.pets.cats.health+behav", > on 22 Aug 2004: [quoted text clipped - 12 lines] > afterwards, what happened with them even for a short time was > PROgression! :) Yes, I agree. And it's *much* sooner than I experienced w/ Herrie & Demelza/Debbie.
Herrie wasn't a pursuer at all, until maybe a year after he had free reign of the house. By which point he realized that if he so much as looked at Demelza in a funny way, she'd start shrieking her head off. (And, boy, that little cat can *shriek*!) So... he learned to chase her around & ambush her - just for funsies, I assume.
Occasionally - a few times/week, there's still an ambush or 'chase Demelza until she seeks refuge under a dresser' routine. But Demelza no longer remains freaked about it, & Herrie... well, he never was the least bit upset, at all. Mr. Happy-Go-Lucky.
The whole thing (the scenario here, more than at your house) reminds me of siblings, where one antagonizes the other just for entertainment value, & the sibling on the receiving end will go shrieking to a parent, yelling "S/he's "x"-ing me!!!" In the meantime the aggressor sibling isn't the least bit fazed - except s/he got the reaction s/he set out to accomplish, & happily wanders off again.
Cathy
Brian Link - 23 Aug 2004 01:33 GMT >> In the fine newsgroup "rec.pets.cats.health+behav", >> on 22 Aug 2004: [quoted text clipped - 35 lines] > >Cathy I often think Henry is an Irish cat - enjoying getting into fights just for the fun of it. =)
BLink
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