Okay, my turn to have a dilemma.  Some of you may know that we now have only 2
cats, Scottie, 7, neutered male, and Abbey, 3, spayed female.  On 3/27 (3
months ago today), we had our beloved Cory, 18, euthanized.  In 2001, we had
Miles, only 8, euthanized, and in, 1999, we had Emily, 14, euthanized.  In the
10 years we have been together, we have had either 3 or 4 indoor cats (and
countless outdoor ferals), so now with only 2, it seems kinda empty to me.  But
I didn't want to rush into anything after Cory.  He was my most "special" kitty
(they've all been wonderful, he was just more bonded to me) and he can't be
replaced, I know, but I sure would like another sweetheart of a kitty that
would let me pick him up all I wanted and would tolerate being kissed (Abbey
hates it and Scottie isn't overly fond of it).

And, shallow as it may seem, I want a tuxedo kitty again.  Cory was one, his
mom, Emily was one, our most recent outdoor feral who met a bad end, Joey, was
one.  My parents' late cat was one and the cat I had growing up was one.  So I
want a tuxedo, especially.  But another black and white might do, too.  My
theory is that we are going to adopt one cat in the next couple of months so
one cat is going to get a home regardless so I may as well hold out for what I
want.

All of my cats have been strays that I've found.  While we currently have
ferals, they are not warming up to us except to accept our food.  Our house is
kind of open...not many places to separate cats.  Only one bathroom so that's
not good.  Trust me, it's pretty much open and only about 1500 sq. feet, not
real big.  So I don't want to trap ferals and bring them in here and tame them.
We take care of our ferals quite well and care about them but feral they will
probably remain.  I want to get a cat from one of the rescues operating out of
PetsMart or possibly the Humane Society.  I want a cat that is already
spayed/neutered, already tested for disease, etc. so I don't have to worry
about that (I always think something bad will happen to them when I take them
in even tho I know that is very rare).  Hence...PetsMart.

Last weekend, I saw a huge b/w cat there, not tuxedo.  Her name is Annie.  She
was offered for 1/2 price because she had just been returned for being "vocal
at night."  I thought about her several times this last week and when we went
in tonight to get the kids their food for the week, she was still there.  We
went in the room and one of the associates let her out in the little room.  She
is tubby!  Tony picked her up, she hissed, growled, etc.  We put her down and
petted her and she again hissed and growled.  I picked her up and she grabbed
my arms with her claws out and tried to nail me (she must weigh about 20
pounds, she was heavy!).  She was vocal throughout making annoyed-sounding
meows.  Not a sterling first impression.  Her card says she was fostered and
gets along with other cats but I wonder.  The adopters from the rescue group
were no longer there so I don't think we could have just taken her even if we
wanted.  I think we would have just filled out an app and waited to hear.  But,
I really feel sorry for Annie and wonder how she will get adopted now.  She's
already reduced to half price and she just was not lovable acting.  I worry we
might be sorry if we take her and that Scottie and Abbey might be even sorrier.
I don't know what they mean by vocal at night.  Scottie is vocal at night for
about 3 or 4 minutes and then goes to sleep.  He does this once or twice
throughout the night but it's tolerable because it's not that long and we are
able to fall back asleep.  Cory used to be vocal at night also but, again, for
only a couple minutes.  I worry that Annie might just be a constant meower and
we do work in the daytime so we do need to sleep at night.  And, as I
mentioned, there are not that many internal doors.  If our house were real big,
we could shut her into a room if she was loud at night but, as it is, we would
just have to shut her out of our room and Scottie and Abbey are used to coming
and going all night.  

I guess I don't think she's quite what I was looking for but I feel so bad for
her and concerned about her future, that I feel drawn to her.  What if she
keeps being returned?  Maybe she was just unhappy being cooped up in a cage at
PetsMart and her real personality didn't come through.  I'm sure it didn't, as
a matter of fact.  Her card said she was loving but we didn't see that, really.
I would feel really bad taking her and then wanting to return her.  But who
will ever take her (rhetorical question)?  The group is no-kill but I wonder
what they will do with her if she isn't adopted for a long time.  I don't know
if they will just leave her there at PetsMart indefinitely or re-foster her or
what.  I guess I should try to talk to one of them and get some answers.

Am I wrong to not take her if I feel it's not right and why do I feel so
guilty?  It's all too sad...but at least she's not at the pound or the humane
society where she would have to pay with her life.

Candace
(take the litter out before replying by e-mail)

See my cats:
http://photos.yahoo.com/maccandace

"One does not meet oneself until one catches the reflection from an eye other
than human."  (Loren Eisely)