He fought so hard from the beginning.  He bett he hawk.  He beat the pet
food posioning.  He fought before the end to get closer to me.  He put his
paw on the end of the table and tried to pull himself closer.  I took his
paw in my hand and told him how much I loved him.  I told him to go to sleep
I would not let him suffer and that I loved him so very much. I would fight
with him to the end.

I WANT MY SPIRIT BACK

Earlier today spirit started acting funny breathing like he had to use his
stomach muscle to breathe. You could rub him up and down pick him up.  He
only made a squeak when he was on his side laying down but he always did
something like that when you rubbed his side. He was eating normally,
jumping around, drinking water  wanting love putting his claws into my arm
when I was not paying attention or on the phone to him so he could have a
treat.
 I took him into the vets on the way over to the vet he started to
try and gasp.  I got him to the vet where he started going down hill.  The
vet tried everything but he told me that cats that come in condition like
this have less than a 50% chance.  I spent the whole time telling spirit
that I loved him and scratching his head trying to keep him calm.  They took
him back for an x-ray where he started to gasp even worse.  He started to
cry out in pain unable to breath.  The vet told me that his lungs were not
expanding and the diaphragm was probably separated.  He told me Spirit was
in pain and it was time.   I stayed with him for the finally minutes.  He
went peacefully I told him that I love him so much and to PLEASE FORGIVE ME.

I brought him home a little while ago and made a place for him out back.
Before I put him in I told him mommy and daddy loves him so much and we will
see him one day. I wrote some personal stuff on the box I used.   I hurt so
much I can't stop crying.  Everywhere I look I see him and hear him.  I pray
he forgives me but I could not let him suffer.  IF I would have brought him
home the vet said he would have not made it thru the night and it would have
been painful. I know I did the right thing but the pain tells me other
things. I pray I did the right thing.   I pray for forgiveness.

I miss him so much.  I miss his walking like a Boston terrier.  I miss him
talking to me.  I miss him putting his paw on my arm telling me he wants a
treat.  I miss him talking to me telling me he wants on the back porch.  I
MISS MY BABY SO MUCH.  He fought so hard to beating the pet food poisoning
last year.  The vet thinks he hurt himself somehow.  I want someone to tell
me why but I know no one can.  The rest of the pack is wandering around
dazed like I am right now.  The pain clouds my vision right now.  I can't
see thru the tears

PLEASE FORGIVE ME SPIRIT.  I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

I WANT MY FURBALL
BACK..............................................................................