on Tue, 05 Jun 2007 02:07:20 GMT, Cheryl <jlhshadow@NOSPAMhotmail.com>
wrote:

I have absolutely no idea what to recommend, other than paritioning your
house somehow so that Bonnie can have safe, private use of a litter box.

This must be heartbreaking for you.  I would be crushed if my boys
stopped loving each other.  I suppose it could happen to any of us,
though, and there's no telling why.

I had a really odd experience recently that is sort of related.  Rudy
LOVES everyone.  Cats, dogs, people, everyone.  We have brought over
strange puppies and dogs and kittens and cats and he's Mister
Congeniality.  He's right at the door greeting anyone who rings the bell,
right next to the dog barking her fool head off, and he's all over
company when they come in.  He's a lover.

However, my mother recenlty got a new kitten and brought him over to
visit and Rudy not only didn't like him, but I was afraid he might hurt
him.  He hissed and spit and his body posture suggested he might attack
him.  So the kitten went home... Bummer, because I was sure the 3 of them
would have a blast.

Sometimes our pets just don't like our other pets and there is no
explaination.  I can't imagine that it is anything you did.  Maybe
Shamrock is a misogynist?  Or maybe Bonnie hurt his ego by laughing when
she saw him peeing?  (Okay, okay... I'll stop!  I couldn't resist)

I'm sorry it's gotten as bad as it has and I hope you can figure out what
to do.

I feel for you. It is a horrible situation (catch 22 situation).
I have a very similar situation developing between Tiggy & Lilly here
right now.
Both females are Birmans, Tiggy is the elder of the 2, both of them
are spayed, but in the last 4 weeks or so, I have noticed Tiggy
climbing higher & higher, so that Lilly can't reach her, simply so
that she can sleep in peace. If she tries to sleep in the arm chair,
Lilly bounds across the room & lands full pelt on her?!! sometimes it
is a blatant attack for no apparent reason, & she frightens Tiggy to
screaming point...I hate it...

I have never seen her do this before, until recently. I don't know why
she is doing it( it hasn't quite reached the stage where she is
pouncing on her in the littler tray), mostly because I have added a
hooded tray for Tiggy's use only. I have shown her where it is (But
not Lilly.. so shh, please don't let her hear about it, or we will
never hear the end of it!!)....

however, all joking apart, I am nearly @ my wits end as to what to do
about it. I already have them almost fully segregated, but it doesn't
make for a happy home life for any of the cats, nor the humans either;
( I have tried Feliway), but all that seems to do is calm the problem
whilst it is running. I was hoping that it might chill them out enough
to start getting along again, but sadly this isn't the case.....I say
sadly, because they used to sleep together in a radiator bed, in the
same cat pen & also out together on walks on their reins...

I am ever so worride about the situation. I have spoken to my vet
about it, & his only answer is to run Feliway full time, or re home
one of them.
If it were a child( which they both feel like @ times, there would be
an uproar!!)
I find both options unacceptable, yet have no answers of my own
either :(
Pity you can't get chill pills for cats, heh?!!
S;o)

Thank you for that. I think you might be right regarding choosing who
might be the alpha female for want of a better way of expressing
myself..???

Whilst Lilly is younger than Tiggy,(Tiggy 3, Lilly is 2) She has been
here far longer than Tiggy has, so perhaps it is time that I
recognised this on her behalf, as well as using the Feliway sprays in
our living room & her bedroom ( or my part time bed, lol.. you know
how it is?!!) I was beginning to despair of this situation, However, I
don't think it time to give up yet. They used to get on fine. this
situation has only become a problem since I had both of them spayed. I
expected them both to become far more friendly towards one another
after I had this done, but it is not the case @ all!!

I will update you with how things progress., & if you have any further
thoughts, please let me know if you wouldn't mind? Many thanks
S;o)

Sounds like my life.  It's been almost 3 years since we got Marbles,
and Abbey still is horrified of him and he will still chase her.  And
my late cat, Scottie (murdered by his vet's ignorance as that is on
topic in this thread, too), also remained terrified of him until his
too early death.

Our house has lots of doors and Marbles lives in the back half and
Abbey lives in the front half.  Marbles whines to get out into the
front of the house so every evening he gets to go out for 2-3 hours
while Abbey camps out under the futon.  Often, she goes under before
he even comes out since she knows the routine. Fortunately, he rarely
tries to go under there after her and, also fortunately, it doesn't
seem to make her miserable.  She just does her time under there and
the minute he goes back to his area, she's out and about, none the
worse for the wear.  Occasionally, if he is in the living room during
his "out" time, she will come out from under the futon and lay
somewhere else in the family room but always close enough to get back
under the futon if he should come toward her.  It's nuts.  He's
aggressive and chases her but I don't think he would actually attack
her.  I don't know quite why she's such a chicken or why Scottie was
either.  Marbles came from a home of 6 cats total and, according to
his former mom who I am still in contact with, he had no problem with
them.  But, in addition to stalking Abbey and Scottie, he will also
get all worked up about the outdoor cats we feed and the neighbor
cats.  Once, he (a totally indoor cat) bolted out the door, when he
had never tried before, and attacked a tom cat who was innocently
sitting there.  Scared the crap outta the poor tom.

I've done the Feliway diffusers and spray and all the tricks to get
them together.  They were gradually introduced when we first got him,
everything you're supposed to do.  He's on 5mg of elavil a day so we
can sleep at night.  Otherwise, he howls all night.  He's hyper.  He's
just a nutty cat but I still don't see why Abbey is quite so afraid of
him.  Or maybe it's not really fear as much as wariness and a desire
to keep away from him.

Right now, I'm in the back of the hosus and they're both out in front,
her under the futon, but I don't have to supervise or anything as,
like I said, it's very unusual for him to try to venture under there
after her.  He, at least, seems to respect that little area of space
of hers.  Sometimes, he'll stare at her under there or roll around in
front of her in a submissive pose but usually he just goes about his
business and ignores her.  The strange thing is, she's not repulsed by
his scent or anything. If he lays somewhere, as soon as she comes out,
she goes and sniffs where he was and lays there, too.  They're just
whacked.

Candace