I take care of three orphaned kittens; one of them, a Russian Blue, is
very delicate and has had problems eliminating since I've had them.  I
received them at 3 weeks, they are now 6 weeks.  A few times I have
brought him back from the edge of death.  But this time, I think he is
going.  I smell death on him, that unmistakable smell of failing
organs.  The vet concurs with me; that he has an intestinal defect that
will probably kill him sooner or later, and we can't keep giving him
enemas to keep him alive.  I have decided to let him go this time, I
hate seeing him suffer any more than he already has.  So, this time, I
made him as comfortable as possible, and left for work.

I am going home for lunch to feed him and his two siblings, and I hope
to find him still alive, but am not keeping my hopes up.

It is so hard to leave him behind when I feel he needs me the most, but
there is nothing I can do for him, and he is comfortable and warm and
dry.  I told him that it's okay for him to go, and he should go if he
needs to, that he should not stay and suffer, and asked him to please
be there to meet me when I get to the other side.

I will have a whole herd of kittes there to greet me when I get to the
Rainbow Bridge!