Cat Forum / Health and Behavior / June 2006
Kitten: Doesn't Like to Be Picked Up
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Larry R Harrison Jr - 01 Jun 2006 13:32 GMT We live out in the "boonies" as it were, and have 2 "established" cats as it were whom we've had for 6+ months or more and are happy with them as they are, no problems.
We found a 3rd one outside in the yard as a kitten, a stray, and we took it in and have been caring for it, this is about 2 weeks or so. It's doing fine, and it's a cute little thing.
The only thing that irks me about this kitten is that it is generally friendly & so forth, but if you dare pick it up, no matter how you hold it when doing so, it screams bloody murder and protests. It can't stand it. It will meow loudly and squirm like a pig.
It obviously can't stand being held, but frankly I have no place in my home for a cat that doesn't like to be held. I have been told that some cats are "just that way," that it's nothing personal. I'm sorry, but to me it is totally 100% personal, and very offensive. To me it's a form of "snobbery" and I don't like it.
We have 2 other cats here that don't mind it one bit, to me if this one is going to stay this way it's just another mouth to feed that, frankly, isn't "earning its keep" the way the other 2 are.
Since it is just a kitten, I'm willing to allow the possibility that it might change and be OK with you holding it when it gets older. But if it's always going to protest, I'm going to put an ad in the paper and give it away.
Do you think that, since it is just a kitten, the odds are pretty good it will grow to not hate behing picked up so much, that it's just a "baby kitten stage" or whatever, or is it more likely a permanent part of its personality?
LRH
dgk - 01 Jun 2006 14:07 GMT >We live out in the "boonies" as it were, and have 2 "established" cats as it >were whom we've had for 6+ months or more and are happy with them as they [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] >when doing so, it screams bloody murder and protests. It can't stand it. It >will meow loudly and squirm like a pig. I have two cats. Nipsy is a mush that you can hold upside down and rub his belly or do just about anything to. He's not too bright and pretty much is a lump. Espy will not tolerate being picked up and isn't a big one for petting in any way. He's also very smart, talks all the time, and is very entertaining.
For the once in a while that Espy decides to come over and sit in my lap, which he does very awkwardly, I treasure the honor. It often seems to come at a very inconvenient time, I notice.
Each cat is different and it is those differences that make them unique. I think that you'll learn to treasure those times when Cat #3 graces you with a rub or a lap sit.
Alan - 01 Jun 2006 14:25 GMT My youngest cat has never liked being picked up - and gives the same almost huffy squeals and wriggles until I put her down. I just assume she doesn't like it, or gets scared of the height.
She makes up for it in other ways though, she likes to be up high and paws the air for me to come close enough for her to butt me with her head.
Cats like to do things on their terms - you'll find other ways of giving/getting affection from your new kitten...
(Think about how you might feel being swept up by something 50 times your size and lifted 30 feet into the air - wouldn't you scream too?)
Joe Canuck - 01 Jun 2006 14:36 GMT > We live out in the "boonies" as it were, and have 2 "established" cats as it > were whom we've had for 6+ months or more and are happy with them as they [quoted text clipped - 30 lines] > > LRH I think you are incorrectly associating human behavior (ie: snobbery, 100% personal, very offensive) characteristics with felines.
The kitten may eventually grow out of that and become more tolerant, but may never like being held or picked up.
Felines are very much individuals with their own personalities, we cannot expect them nor should we want them to all be the same.
There are two possible reasons for this... that the kitten just don't like being handled much -or- that the kitten was not handled much by humans when it was young.
Handle the kitten on a regular daily basis and be very gentle. Let it go when the squirming gets aggressive. Perhaps entice the kitten to stay on your lap with treats or through some method of play the kitten enjoys.
Try different forms of handling, such as turning the kitten over on it's tummy and giving it a belly rub without actually holding it. Show it that there are pleasures to being handled by humans. Do not give it a hard time at all when you handle it, because that will just reinforce the concept that being handled by humans is not a good thing.
Patience and being gentle is very important.
Larry R Harrison Jr - 02 Jun 2006 00:20 GMT Thanks for the tips.
I do like the kitten. In fact I just got through playing some with it--and this did INCLUDE some picking it up & holding it--and it didn't protest as much, in fact in some short stretches it didn't protest at all. It was great.
I don't mind its playing in other ways, and I don't demand the ability or whatever to handle it a LOT, heck I don't want to handle it 24 hours a day. I just don't want it to protest so strongly anytime I dare to pick it up to show it affection. The most recent time that this happened was last night when it was in our bedroom as we were preparing to call it a night, and I was just picking it up to usher it out the door GENTLY and tell it while doing so "you silly goose, we humans can't sleep with you in here!" It was while doing this and trying to LOVE on it while doing so that it began protesting and squirming, and I took offense to it.
Since then, again, I have done some handling of it as I like to and it hasn't been nearly as protestive (if that's a word). So maybe it can work out.
I do realize that cats have different personalities, no problem. But I've long ago decided this was one personality trait that I don't like. It's just like some people love dogs that jump all up with hyperactivity, others don't--they want something gentler. If they try out a dog and it ends up being too hyper, rather than "learning to appreciate it as it is" they instead find it a home where the owner LIKES that personality and they get a different dog.
No difference here. I have no intentions of forcing my will if the cat hates being handled, but if it hates it, it will not be kept because I just don't have any interests in "learning to appreciate diversity" or whatever. I can appreciate it in theory per se, but it's just not what I'm looking for in a cat. Period. Case closed.
But again--today, it was receptive to it, and we had plenty of sweet moments all the way around, so maybe it will work out. I just wanted feedback on whether young kittens can change in that department over time, that's all.
And again I do appreciate the tips from those who said things like "try giving it treats, scratching its belly etc." I have no problem doing that.
LRH
Ryan Robbins - 02 Jun 2006 03:20 GMT > I do realize that cats have different personalities, no problem. But I've > long ago decided this was one personality trait that I don't like. It's [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > whatever. I can appreciate it in theory per se, but it's just not what I'm > looking for in a cat. Period. Case closed. Pets are not objects. They are living creatures who deserve as much respect as you would give a person. You would put your child up for adoption if you didn't like the way he was turning out after a year, would you?
Larry R Harrison Jr - 02 Jun 2006 09:42 GMT > Pets are not objects. They are living creatures who deserve as much > respect as you would give a person. You would put your child up for > adoption if you didn't like the way he was turning out after a year, would > you? Sorry, but I couldn't disagree more with that statement--and I would go so far as to say that those who agree with it are a leading cause for much of what is wrong with the world today.
It is because of people like this that we have situations such as the Diane Whipple case--a woman who was mauled to death by two aggressive dogs. Turns out the dog owners knew full well how dangerous the dogs were and did NOTHING about it--one of the owners even was quoted AFTER the deaths as saying to the effect "if the people around here don't like our dogs they can leave." It is also because of this mentality that you get the more routine & annoying, like a neighbor whose cats trespass into the adjoining yard and put paw prints all over the hood of the neighbors' cars--and the cat owner, rather than taking responsibility, will basically say "well gee, if you'd garage your cars this wouldn't be a problem." Or they'll minimize it in a very insulting way, saying "what's the big deal, they're just cars." (It's called TRESPASSING where I come from.)
And of course the classic cases of the dogs that go into the neighbor's yard to "take care of business" as it were, sometimes with the owner's encouragement being the cause of it. (As an aside--I heard of the case of one person who was a victim of this who handled the problem in a most excellent way. He'd take the offending "by-products" produced by his neighbor's dog, and throw the "by-products" onto the dog owner's porch. Word has it that the problem stopped immediately.)
Pets aren't objects, true, but they aren't people either. Anyone that considers their cat, dog, racoon, whatever, to be as important to them as their people friends--especially ones like wife, children, parents--sorry, but such a person has mental issues. It has long been established--at least until we went koo-koo the last 30 years or so anyway--that animals sit in a place distinctly below humans in the importance level of things. This is NOT to justify abuse or mistreatment, but rather to put animals' importance in perspective. There is nothing wrong with loving your cat, dog, snake, pick your pet it doesn't matter--but if you consider it as important to you as your spouse or children etc, you've got problems, serious problems.
So, to equate giving away a cat--a cat we found out in the yard wandering, it's not as if we sought the cat out deliberately--to equate this with being the same as turning your back on a child, that's a mentally challenged position to hold. I will pray for you my friend, you need help.
LRH
Ryan Robbins - 03 Jun 2006 11:11 GMT >> Pets are not objects. They are living creatures who deserve as much >> respect as you would give a person. You would put your child up for [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > Diane Whipple case--a woman who was mauled to death by two aggressive > dogs. You're forgetting why the dogs were aggressive. The owners made them so.
> Pets aren't objects, true, but they aren't people either. Anyone that > considers their cat, dog, racoon, whatever, to be as important to them as > their people friends--especially ones like wife, children, parents--sorry, > but such a person has mental issues. Nope. Pet ownership is quite beneficial to the owner when it comes to mental health -- a lot more so than an another person, who will argue with you, drive you batty with personal quirks in housekeeping and whatnot, etc.
> So, to equate giving away a cat--a cat we found out in the yard wandering, > it's not as if we sought the cat out deliberately--to equate this with > being the same as turning your back on a child, that's a mentally > challenged position to hold. I will pray for you my friend, you need help. I hope you do not own any pets.
Wendy - 02 Jun 2006 12:40 GMT > Thanks for the tips. > [quoted text clipped - 40 lines] > > LRH More than likely the kitten is just terrified because it's not all that used to people and finds itself that far off solid ground. It sounds like a trust thing. The kitten will more than likely come around and not protest so dramatically. OTOH it might never like being picked up and held. I have a cat who is a lap cat to the point of being a pest sometimes but he doesn't like being held. He's actually the most affectionate cat I have.
I have no doubt this cat will eventually become a wonderful pet but am not so sure if that will happen in your household. You seem to have limited tolerance for this cat and it might be best to re-home him as soon as an appropriate placement can be found. My suggestion would be to look for home where they have experience socializing stray/feral kittens and aren't stuck on having a cat that enjoys being picked up.
W
P No Gree G O - 02 Jun 2006 14:01 GMT One more time folks:
This guy is a TROLL and has posted this exact same scenario before.
He gets off on your outrage, so PLEASE stop feeding him!!
cybercat - 02 Jun 2006 14:04 GMT > One more time folks: > > This guy is a TROLL and has posted this exact same scenario before. > > He gets off on your outrage, so PLEASE stop feeding him!! This never works, Ms. PeeNo, though I understand the temptation to try it.
Larry R Harrison Jr - 02 Jun 2006 21:32 GMT Thanks for the feedback, Wendy. I didn't realize that if a cat (especially a kitten) had its background this could be a factor. I did consider that since it was a kitten and not fully grown yet it could change.
Actually, it already has. It does still meow when I pick it up, but it's not so intense--and it doesn't squirm like a pig anymore. It is already coming around it seems.
If it does end up hate being held when all is said & done then yes I would rehome it. If it keeps doing as it's done the last couple of days or so, though, it would be a pleasure to keep him.
Heck, the other 2 cats are starting to come around--I even found the new one & one of the others sleeping together in a box, it was the sweetest thing. It's also cute when this new kitten engages in play with the others, chewing on their ears and chasing their tail and so forth. Really cute.
LRH
>> Thanks for the tips. >> [quoted text clipped - 58 lines] > > W P No Gree G O - 01 Jun 2006 18:59 GMT Here we go again. Same troll, different year...
TROLL O - METER
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 -------------------------------------- ^
CatNipped - 01 Jun 2006 20:07 GMT > Here we go again. Same troll, different year... > [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > -------------------------------------- > ^ Yep, this is the same guy who claimed to shoot stray cats who wandered onto his property. [Sorry, Larry, some of us have long memories.]
 Signature Hugs,
CatNipped
See all my masters at: http://www.PossiblePlaces.com/CatNipped/
Matthew aka NMR - 01 Jun 2006 20:34 GMT Same guy that did this quote
"It" does even better. It is a living & breathing thing, but it's an animal. I've always thought that only humans deserved such a distinction. Humans & animals are distinctly different, and "it" is one way to stress that.
Doesn't mean I don't love her--I do--but my cat, well, it's not my entire life.
>> Here we go again. Same troll, different year... >> [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > Yep, this is the same guy who claimed to shoot stray cats who wandered > onto his property. [Sorry, Larry, some of us have long memories.] Matthew aka NMR - 01 Jun 2006 20:37 GMT Or my favorite
"Exactly--as well they shouldn't. Humans deserve superior protections under the law vs. animals. Animals are not people and should not be promoted to the same tier, despite numerous persons who state that their pets are like their children are to others. That's a bit much. And I like both of our cats, like them a lot--but children they are NOT"
>> Here we go again. Same troll, different year... >> [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > Yep, this is the same guy who claimed to shoot stray cats who wandered > onto his property. [Sorry, Larry, some of us have long memories.] mnemonic - 02 Jun 2006 03:50 GMT > Or my favorite > [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > And I like both of our cats, like them a lot--but children they are > NOT" aaaaaaah! Lyns gonna kick your tail
Lyn says a pig has the same rights as you do
Pigs are filthy animals. I don't eat filthy animals. sure bacon tastes good, pork chops taste gooood.
AND sewer rat may taste like pumpkin pie, but I'd never know 'cause I wouldn't eat the filthy motherf%^ker.
Pigs sleep and root in sh.t. That's a filthy animal. I ain't eatin' nothin' that ain't got sense enough to disregard its own feces.
Now a dog eats its own feces, I don't eat dog either.
I wouldn't go so far as to call a dog filthy but they're definitely dirty. A dog's got personality. Personality goes a long way.
So by that rationale, if a pig had a better personality, he would cease to be a filthy animal. but we'd have to be talkin' about one charmin' mother$%ckin' pig. I mean he'd have to be ten times more charmin' than that Arnold on Green Acres, you know what I'm sayin''?
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Oh man! I shot Marvin in the face!
D. - 03 Jun 2006 13:07 GMT > Pigs sleep and root in sh.t. That's a filthy animal. I ain't eatin' > nothin' that ain't got sense enough to disregard its own feces. They don't when they're not kept that way . . .
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-L. - 05 Jun 2006 07:43 GMT > Oh man! I shot Marvin in the face! Do you see a sign that says "Dead nigger storage"?
-L.
cybercat - 01 Jun 2006 20:37 GMT > > Here we go again. Same troll, different year... > > [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > Yep, this is the same guy who claimed to shoot stray cats who wandered onto > his property. [Sorry, Larry, some of us have long memories.] That's why I thought "Hello, a.shole" was an appropriate response. :)
Magic Mood Jeep© - 01 Jun 2006 20:38 GMT >> Here we go again. Same troll, different year... >> [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > wandered onto his property. [Sorry, Larry, some of us have long > memories.] As well as that he posted this *exact* same problem this time last year.
I plonked him, but aparently he's changed his headers.
Just a control freak, doesn't realize that, like people, cats have their own likes & dislikes.
D. - 03 Jun 2006 13:06 GMT > Here we go again. Same troll, different year... > [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > -------------------------------------- > ^ Awww, give him a two for consistency. :)
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mnemonic - 03 Jun 2006 14:09 GMT > > TROLL O - METER > > [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > > Awww, give him a two for consistency. :) it was a pretty good troll he got me!
kitten screaming, how delectable
P No Gree G O - 03 Jun 2006 14:13 GMT >>Here we go again. Same troll, different year... >> [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > > Awww, give him a two for consistency. :) Okay, okay... he gets a 2 for consistency and for effort:
TROLL O - METER
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cybercat - 01 Jun 2006 20:35 GMT > We live out in the "boonies" as it were, and have 2 "established" cats as it > were whom we've had for 6+ months or more and are happy with them as they [quoted text clipped - 28 lines] > kitten stage" or whatever, or is it more likely a permanent part of its > personality? Hello, a.shole. :)
Joe Canuck - 01 Jun 2006 22:48 GMT >> We live out in the "boonies" as it were, and have 2 "established" cats as > it [quoted text clipped - 38 lines] > > Inviato da X-Privat.Org - Registrazione gratuita http://www.x-privat.org/join.php Oh crap! I've been had.
Oh well, the advice is out there for those with similar REAL issues.
mnemonic - 01 Jun 2006 23:09 GMT > The only thing that irks me about this kitten is that it is generally > friendly & so forth, but if you dare pick it up, no matter how you hold it > when doing so, it screams bloody murder and protests. It can't stand it. It > will meow loudly and squirm like a pig. oh hell! what? you scared she's going to bite you? you scared she's going to scratch you and give you an infection?
just roll her into your chest.. bite her ear and she'll chill plant big kisses on her, eat her up see...
cover her on all sides... then she knows she won't fall dumbass
you thought she would just walk up and pull her panties down for you?
YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT PUSSY
mnemonic - 01 Jun 2006 23:17 GMT > The only thing that irks me about this kitten is that it is generally > friendly & so forth, but if you dare pick it up, no matter how you hold it > when doing so, it screams bloody murder and protests. It can't stand it. It > will meow loudly and squirm like a pig. I'm sorry Larry, I didn't mean to say that
yes, I had wrote it, but I was just thinking it, (that is takes a pussy whipped dummy to let a kitten intimidate him) I meant to go back and edit it out
I realized I forgot to edit after I hit send... sort of like locking your keys in the car
so sorry
Ryan Robbins - 02 Jun 2006 03:11 GMT > It obviously can't stand being held, but frankly I have no place in my > home for a cat that doesn't like to be held. I have been told that some > cats are "just that way," that it's nothing personal. I'm sorry, but to me > it is totally 100% personal, and very offensive. To me it's a form of > "snobbery" and I don't like it. With this attitude of yours, I can't take your post seriously.
> We have 2 other cats here that don't mind it one bit, to me if this one is > going to stay this way it's just another mouth to feed that, frankly, > isn't "earning its keep" the way the other 2 are. It sounds as though you shouldn't be taking care of any animals.
bobblespin - 02 Jun 2006 14:19 GMT >> It obviously can't stand being held, but frankly I have no place in >> my home for a cat that doesn't like to be held. I have been told that [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > > It sounds as though you shouldn't be taking care of any animals.
It's not something to be taken personally. Our Sonny is extremely affectionate and needs people time as much as private time. However, he will only tolerate being picked up and held for about 2 minutes, and only if he is held in a certain way (lying sideways in our arms). This is ok with us because now that he weighs 16 pounds, he's too heavy for us to carry for very long anyway. And when he does sit on my lap, it can be downright painful after 15 minutes. When you think of the amount of minutes each day that you might be carrying this kitty throughout his life, it doesn't really matter much.
D. - 03 Jun 2006 13:04 GMT > > It obviously can't stand being held, but frankly I have no place in my > > home for a cat that doesn't like to be held. I have been told that some [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > > With this attitude of yours, I can't take your post seriously. He comes in here periodically and posts variations of this theme. It's pretty sad, whether he actually feels this way or whether he's posting to get a rise.
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WookieTim@gmail.com - 02 Jun 2006 20:09 GMT Well, the only way Ray (My little furball of joy AKA Devil cat) will tolerate being held is if I am moving around - he likes to watch the scenery pass from a different angle. He will NOT allow me to hold him and stand still (I guess he just get's bored).
Of course, he is also very affectionate in other ways, and loves to sit between me and the arm of the couch when I watch a DVD.
What I'm trying to say is that some cats don't like to be picked up (Some people don't like to shake hands, or hug in public), but I'm sure they'll show love in other ways.
John Doe - 05 Jun 2006 09:08 GMT "Larry R Harrison Jr" <larrytxeast gmail.com> wrote:
> > We live out in the "boonies" as it were, and have 2 "established" [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > we took it in and have been caring for it, this is about 2 weeks > or so. It's doing fine, and it's a cute little thing. Good thing it's not ugly. On TV, ugly usually means evil.
> The only thing that irks me about this kitten is that it is > generally friendly & so forth, but if you dare pick it up, no [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > very offensive. To me it's a form of "snobbery" and I don't like > it. Cats are small, light, and under your management, but they're not human children.
> Do you think that, since it is just a kitten, the odds are pretty > good it will grow to not hate behing picked up so much, that it's > just a "baby kitten stage" or whatever, or is it more likely a > permanent part of its personality? You are a human being, I guess, you are a much more advanced creature.
With that in mind, seems to me that rather than making your cat understand and cope with you, more realistic is to understand and cope with your cat. That's my main theory when dealing with cats and other lesser creatures. I think it can lead to a healthy animal and help avoid problems.
The young tomcat I took off of the street had been beaten up pretty badly. He is perpetually timid, probably because being mauled is a traumatic experience. He comes over and lies down next to me like when I'm brushing my teeth, and I see that as a significant accomplishment.
I think most cats don't enjoy being held, even while they don't protest. Cats like to be in control (heheh, in control of at least themselves if not the things around them).
Good luck.
> LRH > [quoted text clipped - 17 lines] > Date: Thu, 01 Jun 2006 12:32:50 GMT > Xref: prodigy.net rec.pets.cats.health+behav:433344 mnemonic - 05 Jun 2006 12:20 GMT > Good thing it's not ugly. On TV, ugly usually means evil. heh! troll got trolled
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