To stem the deepening red ink expected in future budgets, U.S.
Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan today urged Congress
to enact legislation that taxes cats.  "There are no seeing-eye
cats, no guard cats, no sheep-herder cats or sled-cats" observed
Greenspan.  "They are freeloaders and it is time we fixed that"
he continued.

Greenspan suggested a $500 per cat head-tax, paid annually with
each cat owner's federal income tax return.  A cat shelter would
pay the tax for each cat under its care.  IRS agents would
survey the country, levying an appropriate cat tax on each
jurisdiction according to the number of feral cats found living
there.  Cat advocacy groups are already lobbying against the
proposed tax in Washington.  It is likely that the American
Civil Liberties Union will challenge its constitutionality in
Federal court.  Fur will certainly fly over this one.