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Cat Forum / Cat Anecdotes / May 2005[OT] Humor
OK, here's my resignation letter *with* the subtext included in brackets: Attn. Executive Officers of ConGlobal Industries, Incorporated (CGI) [Supreme Idiots] Re. Resignation [You're F*cked] Dear Sirs: I have been presented with an extraordinary opportunity to advance in my career [*much* better than *you* @$$holes could *ever* offer]. Since, during our recent meeting, Mr. XXXX [shortsightedly] stated that there were no opportunities for advancement for me within CGI [and since CGI itself will probably go bankrupt from mismanagement], I have decided to take advantage of this offer and tender my resignation, effective June 3, 2005 [f*ck you, you d*ckheads]. Because of the pressing needs of my new employer, I can only offer you one week's notice [ha ha, it's an "at will" state and you idiots didn't sign me to a contract], but we can discuss what I might be able to do to alleviate any transition issues you may have [and during that discussion I can tell you that you should have thought of this *before* you tried to screw me over, so f*ck off and die]. Thank you for making my working experience here interesting [as in the Chinese curse, "May you live in interesting times"]. I appreciate the opportunities I was given to learn [that you are *really* stupid @$$holes] and develop [a deep and abiding hatred for you]. In return, I believe that the contributions I have made to your company, e.g. your new internet, the time and cost saving applications I developed, and the intranet upon which they run [which was SO far above and beyond what we agreed I would do when you hired me], will continue to benefit CGI for many years to come [and they 'll only do so since *I'M* not petty enough to trash the entire site which I could do and you're too ignorant to ever be able to fix it again]. Wishing CGI success and prosperity [*NOT*], CatNipped > OK, here's my resignation letter *with* the subtext included in > brackets: [quoted text clipped - 36 lines] > > CatNipped LOVE IT!!!!!!!! Jill > OK, here's my resignation letter *with* the subtext included in brackets: > [quoted text clipped - 35 lines] > > CatNipped Do you suppose any of them read "anecdotes"? MLB >> OK, here's my resignation letter *with* the subtext included in >> brackets: [quoted text clipped - 39 lines] > > Do you suppose any of them read "anecdotes"? MLB I have seen concerns like this expressed before. I seriously doubt it. Half the people I worked with in the I.T. industry were like, "Newsgroups? What's that?" or "Isn't that like those old bulletin boards?" Meaning: man, you're an old fart. Jill >>> OK, here's my resignation letter *with* the subtext included in >>> brackets: [quoted text clipped - 46 lines] > > Jill Yes, but now with the new Google Groups, you could easily do a search in all groups for a certain person. -- Britta "There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast." -- Unknown Check out pictures of Vino at: http://photos.yahoo.com/badwilson click on the Vino album > >>> OK, here's my resignation letter *with* the subtext included in > >>> brackets: [quoted text clipped - 60 lines] > Check out pictures of Vino at: > http://photos.yahoo.com/badwilson click on the Vino album You'd still have to know newsgroups exist, though, and as Yowie said, most people don't. Joy >>>>> OK, here's my resignation letter *with* the subtext included in >>>>> brackets: [quoted text clipped - 61 lines] > > Joy Not to mention, the new Google Groups interface sucks! LOL Jill >>>>> OK, here's my resignation letter *with* the subtext included in >>>>> brackets: [quoted text clipped - 11 lines] >>>>> [shortsightedly] stated that there were no opportunities for >>>>> advancement for me within CGI [and since CGI itself will probably >>>>> go bankrupt from mismanagement], I have decided to take advantage >>>>> of this offer and tender my resignation, effective June 3, 2005 >>>>> [f*ck you, you d*ckheads]. [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] >>>>> have [and during that discussion I can tell you that you should >>>>> have thought of this *before* you tried to screw me over, so f*ck >>>>> off and die]. >>>>> [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] >>>>> made to your company, e.g. your new internet, the time and cost >>>>> saving applications I developed, and the intranet upon which they >>>>> run [which was SO far above and beyond what we agreed I would do >>>>> when you hired me], will continue to benefit CGI for many years >>>>> to come [and they 'll only do so since *I'M* not petty enough to >>>>> trash the entire site which I could do and you're too ignorant to >>>>> ever be able to fix it again]. >>>>> [quoted text clipped - 23 lines] > > Joy Yes, but I wonder how many people go to google something and then wonder what happens when they click on "groups" and then just continue from there. -- Britta "There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast." -- Unknown Check out pictures of Vino at: http://photos.yahoo.com/badwilson click on the Vino album >>>>>> OK, here's my resignation letter *with* the subtext included in >>>>>> brackets: [quoted text clipped - 31 lines] > wonder what happens when they click on "groups" and then just continue > from there. I'm sorry, but I just don't think your average employer has that much interest in their employees to give a rats a** what they do on their own time, much less go searching for posts from them in newsgroups on the off chance they might have said something negative. Jill > > OK, here's my resignation letter *with* the subtext included in brackets: > > [quoted text clipped - 37 lines] > > Do you suppose any of them read "anecdotes"? MLB If they did, Catnipped would probably have been fired already. Most people, including many ISPs have never heard of Newsgroups, and even if theyhave, even less people know about the ones that don't carry binaries, and even less again would think of looking at a group about anecdotes about cats. Yowie > OK, here's my resignation letter *with* the subtext included in > brackets: [quoted text clipped - 36 lines] > > CatNipped LOL. I hope you don't send the wrong copy by mistake.  SignatureAdrian (Owned by Snoopy & Bagheera) A house is not a home, without a cat. OMG!!!! I'm speechless!!!! I've always thought your writing was eloquent, but this one is nothing short of a masterpiece. It really flows. Oh, and the (f*ck you, you d*ckheads) was an especially nice touch. Say.......I've been meaning to write some letters........? grins -bonbon > Because of the pressing needs of my new employer, I can only offer > you one week's notice [ha ha, it's an "at will" state and you idiots > didn't sign me to a contract], but we can discuss what I might be > able to do to alleviate any transition issues you may have [and > during that discussion I can tell you that you should have thought > of this *before* you tried to screw me over, so f*ck off and die]. Addendum: [And I'll be sure to charge you my consulting (read: expensive) rates for any further work I do.] Signaturemonique, who spoils Oscar unmercifully pictures: http://www.bounceswoosh.org/rpca |
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