Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
distinct slowdown in the overall performance, particularly in the
flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under
Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs,
such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed
undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NHL 4.3, MLB 3.0, and NBA 3.6.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes
the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, to
no avail. What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate

Dear Desperate:

First, keep in mind that Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package,
while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Try to enter the command:
"C:/ITHOUGHTYOULOVEDME" to download Tears 6.2, which should
automatically install Guilt 3.0. If that application works as
designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications
Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

Remember, though, that overuse of the above application can cause
Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer
6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create Snoring Loudly
10.8. Whatever you do: DO NOT install Mother-in- Law 1.0 or reinstall
another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and
will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program,
but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications
quickly.

You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and
performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck,
Tech Support
Theresa
Stinky Pictures: http://community.webshots.com/album/125591586JWEFwh
My Blog: http://www.humanitas.blogspot.com