I walked up to Nox
to groom her onna back
but she clawed me and
she started talkin' smack

And there was a word
that Nocturne said
right after she slapped me
in the head

It started with "F"
and it ended with "k"
Then she added a "you"
and said I was gay

(Not that it really would
matter if I were
but I know I'm not gay
'cause I wanna lick HER)

And then she told me
I was ugly and fat
and she waltzed away
like that was that

but I know I'm not ugly
cause the hot lady vet
said I'm as handsome
as a kitty can get

f-a-t?
or maybe I'm PHAT
cause I'm pokey Smokey
the rapping tom cat

and Nox is a b!tch
without any taste
which is sort of a shame
cause it's really a waste

she's sleek and black
and oh so fine
wanna lick you baby
wanna make you mine

but after three years
I know you far too well
your body's made in heaven
and your heart is made in hell

So I'm gonna lick the bitties
cause they know I'm really hot
gonna nuzzle them tonight
gonna show 'em what I got

and as for you Nocturne
you can sleep all alone
on your pillow that you think
is your little kitty throne

and you can be lonely
you frigid b!tch
with no tom cat
to scratch your itch

and you can stew
in your hate and vice...
hey mommy, what the ****
is a "genesis device?"

dad, it's Nox
she's been on the Net
emailing terrorists
or something I bet

and she left a note
to explain her crime
"So sorry my humans
but I fear it's time

to address an issue
that makes me sick--
that stupid tom cat
who loves to lick.

To show you my love
and him my wrath
I give you this coupon
for a free groom and bath

and follow it off
with a poodle clip--
Now take poor Smokey
on his special trip."

Next time I wanna lick her
I'm gonna think twice...
stupid plan code named
"genesis device"

cause I feel really dumb
and bald and wet
and about as unsexy
as I can get.

--Smokey, keepin' it phresh, yo