These ponderings were on the joke-page of a TV-guide and I thought I'd
post them here too. Some I've seen before, but... oh well... Here goes:

If a person using sign language curses, will his hands be washed with soap?
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If a schizophrenic threatens to kill himself, should it be considered a
hostage situation?
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Why does one press the buttons of the remote harder when the batteries
are dying?
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Why is there no catfood that tastes like mice?
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If a man is talking in the forest, and there isn't a woman for miles to
hear him, is he still wrong?
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If a turtle loses his shield, should he be considered naked or homeless?
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How do the snow plow drivers get to work?
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If nothing sticks to teflon then how do they get *it* to stick to the pan?
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If a sandwich always falls with the buttered side down, and a cat always
 lands on his paws, then what happens if you tie a sandwich to a cat's
back with the buttered side up?
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If love is blind, why is sexy underwear so popular?
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What do you do if the text on the box instead of "Open here" says "Open
somewhere else"?
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If wool shrinks when you wash it, then why don't sheep shrink in the rain?
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Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
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Why is the needle sterilized when given a death row prisoner his lethal
injection?
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If super glue fastens anything then why doesn't it stick to the inside
of the bottle?
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If you strangle a Smurf (a blue cartoon character/CK observation), what
colour does it's face become?