Ever since IBKFergus has made herself at home here, my bed has suffered a
terrible infestation of bedmice. I"ve asked Shmogg if the bedmice were here
before IBKFergus turned up, and why he doesn't try to exterminate the pests
himself, because I know he's a much better hunter than Fergus, but Shmogg
just shrugs his shoulders and tells me that if some small upstart kitten
wants to get all worked up about the hameless variety, why should he get in
her way? If she wants to do allt he work while he dozes in the window sill,
thats he problem not his.

Fair enough.

Still, its been a long time since the last bedmice infestation, about 14
years ago or so, if I recall correctly, coincidentally, about the time whn
Shmogg was a kitten. I"m still not entirely immune to this new plague, and
keep forgetting to keep my feet entirely enclosed in doona. This leads to a
number of unfortunate accidents at about 4am when IBKFergus is right in the
middle of pest control and forgets that my feet are not part of the herd of
bedmice that are clearly rampaging throughout the rest of the bed.

Many interesting words have been said to IBKFergus when she does this, but
it doesn't seem to discourage her for long, and she's always back to
fighting the good fight the next night. I know she must be doing an
incredible job with the amount of energy and effort she spends on the
extermination, but these must be one of the most pernicious mob of bedmice
ever to infest humanity.

Last night, the bedmice were particularly bad. I think I may have picked
some up from our day trip to Katoomba, which left the house otherwise
unoccupied. I think perhaps that bedmice might be rather afraid of active
awake humans, and don't tend to breed as much in their presence, because the
bedmice plague are noticably worse if all humans have been out of the house
for a significant portion of the day. IBKfergus was doing a *great* job,
I've never seen her so busy. Even Shmogg was interested, and was cheeringing
on and giving tips from his windowsill. My feet were bitten about 7 times in
total, but I can't complain because if my feet were bitten 7 times, at least
70 bedmice must have met their maker in the process.

Eventually, IBKFergus stopped for a few minutes just to get her breath back
and perhaps wash an ear (as you do).

Just then, right under her very being, there was an aweful rumble and a
shaking. It sounded like thunder, but was much much worse. The sound quickly
reached a crescendo, and then the covers fluffed. OMG! The smell! The
bedmice had let off some sort of toxic gas bomb right underneath her, and it
was penetrating her *fur*!

She must have lept about 3 foot straight up, landing *kaplonk*straight into
my bladder and then left the bed at lightening speed, desperate to escape
the overpowering stench. She only dared enter the room again to remind me
about breakfast a good few hours later.

And me? I just giggled, and vowed to eat beans more often.

Yowie