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Cat Forum / Cat Anecdotes / January 2005"Why I Am Not Thin" [OT]
I was rummaging through some old school papers when I found this homework from English Literature during my freshman year of college - 28 years ago (I delayed going back to school until my daughter was 5 and I have some other stories about the kids and motherhood if you're interested). I thought you might get a kick out of it. ================================================================ "Why I Am Not Thin" by Lori Crews 1. Starving tends to be painful. Anyone who is overweight knows the desperation that can come in the middle of the night when all the food stores and carry out "quick eats" are closed and suddenly "it" strikes. "It" is a craving for something, *anything* fattening. You can assuage your hunger without going out in only one way - become pregnant. Any good father-to-be will travel 15 miles at three in the morning to satisfy the craving of a mother-to-be. But since it is difficult to remain pregnant for any length of time, a food-aholic must develop other resources. I tried to convince my husband that my eating binges were post-partum cravings, but when my youngest child was four years old, he stopped believing that. 2. To be thin you have to diet. Talking about diets is boring. There's nothing worse than being caught in a conversation with a chronic fad dieter. Not only do you have to hear about each mouthful of cottage cheese, but you're also subjected to detailed descriptions of each food's effect on various bodily functions. Attending a "Fatties Anonymous" meeting is about as interesting as sitting in the front row of a proctologist's lecture! 3. I like food and eating. I hate it when people ask me why I eat so much (a thin person's basic question). Aside from having a life-long love affair with food and the will power of a gnat, there are many logical reasons why I eat. I eat when I'm nervous. I eat when I'm depressed. I eat when I'm angry. I eat when I'm happy. In fact, the only time I don't eat is when I'm asleep. I don't sleep enough. And I can never, never leave leftovers on the table. What would all those starving people in India do if I didn't eat all the food on my plate? 4. It's not my fault. Thin people don't know this, but there's a conspiracy in American television to keep fat people fat. Have you ever noticed that as soon as you go on a diet the steak and finger lobster commercial is run two hundred and fifty-six times a day? That's a total of one thousand, seven hundred and ninety-two times the first week of your diet, not even counting all the Big Macs, frozen pizzas, and talking ice cream freezers all us urging you to try me, fry me, *buy* me! 5. I don't want to be thin. Thin people make me nervous. They move around a lot faster than fat people. You just know that if a fire breaks out in your crowded building all the thin people will be out before a fat person can get out of his chair. Burning to death would be a painful way to lose weight. 6. I have no will power I can't believe that humans, frail and fallible as we are, can have the will power it take to be thin. There's something unnatural about a person who can refuse a chocolate ?clair without drooling all over her host's carpet. I have a theory that thin people are really alien spies sent from Alpha Centuri some years back to invade Earth. The brought with them two of their most powerful weapons: Cholesterol and Cellulite! I can't think of any other logical explanation for all those thinnies. 7. Being fat can be a good thing. Most people don't realize that being fat has a lot of advantages (well, maybe two). If you're a fat woman's libber, you won't have that awful problem of being treated as a sex object. And a fat person doesn't have to worry about what to wear - there are only three dresses on the size 24 rack. 8. Never mind! I guess there's no real reason for writing this paper. If you're a fat person you already know all the suffering of a Monday dieter. You know what it's like to go pale and weak at the sight of a bathroom scale. And if you're a thin person... please go back to Alpha Centuri! ================================================================= Hugs, CatNipped > I was rummaging through some old school papers when I found this homework > from English Literature during my freshman year of college - 28 years ago (I > delayed going back to school until my daughter was 5 and I have some other > stories about the kids and motherhood if you're interested). I thought you > might get a kick out of it. I sure did! I loved it. Dan > 7. Being fat can be a good thing. > Most people don't realize that being fat has a lot of advantages (well, [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > worry about what to wear - there are only three dresses on the size 24 > rack. ...> > CatNipped One more advantage: Hefty women are less likely than thin women to get osteoporosis. Annie > One more advantage: > > Hefty women are less likely than thin women to get osteoporosis. Really? I would have thought the opposite, since they(we) put more strain on the skeletal structure. >> One more advantage: >> >> Hefty women are less likely than thin women to get osteoporosis. > > Really? I would have thought the opposite, since they(we) put more > strain on the skeletal structure. I just did a quick search on Google with the words "osteoporosis likely obese thin". There is plenty of info on the net on big ppl not getting osteoporosis as easily as thin ones, but here's one example: http://www2.netdoctor.co.uk/diseases/facts/osteoporosis.htm QUOTE People with a BMI of 21 or less have a higher rate of bone loss than those who are heavier, and obese people have lower rates of bone loss than those who are ideal weight. UNQUOTE  SignatureChristine in Vantaa, Finland christal63 (at) yahoo (dot) com photos: http://photos.yahoo.com/christal63 >>> One more advantage: >>> [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] > than those who are ideal weight. > UNQUOTE But what if we(thinner) folks drink milk every day and also eat lots of other forms of calcium? I'm not trying to buck the posts, but I doubt being overweight has any real benefit over not being overweight. I did find the post amusing; I like to eat, too. I simply have a genetic predisposition to being short and skinny. But Mom wears a size 0 or 2 and thinks I'm "fat" because I wear a size 6 or 8. I suppose when I'm 79 (if I live that long) I'll be back to a size 2, too.) Jill >>>> One more advantage: >>>> [quoted text clipped - 25 lines] > > Jill Honestly, if you eat right and exercise, it probably doesn't matter, but so many thin women subsist on Diet coke and never eat fruits or vegetables, I think that pumps the statistics sideways. A chiropractor I know found that his 20 somethings were coming in with bones as brittle as 80 y.o.s because of diet. >>>>> One more advantage: >>>>> [quoted text clipped - 36 lines] > bones as brittle as 80 y.o.s because > of diet. Honey, I've never had a Diet Coke in my life. I don't drink sodas. Wasn't raised that way and never acquired the taste for them. I also don't care for candy or cookies except on rare occasions. I *adore* spinach and brussels sprouts and cauliflower and broccoli. Also beef, veal, lamb, pork, chicken, beans of all kinds and don't stop me before I get to the soups made with cabbage, tomatoes, rice, lentils, barley, etc. :) Jill > Honestly, if you eat right and exercise, it probably doesn't matter, but so > many thin women subsist on Diet coke and never eat fruits or vegetables, I > think that pumps the statistics sideways. A chiropractor I know found that > his 20 somethings were coming in with bones as brittle as 80 y.o.s because > of diet. Not to mention the growing numbers of obese teen-agers! Time was when "getting heavy" was considered a natural part of the aging process (of course, it's not), and most teens were reasonably slender. Fat children and teen-aged girls were the exception, not the rule. But of course, I'm judging from when I was young - kids didn't have the money to buy much in the way of snacks to augment our regular diet. We were expected to eat the lunch we brought from home, unaugmented by potato chips and other such snacks. Dinner was a family affair where we were expected to eat what was put before us..... And of course, after school, we were usually out doing something active, not watching TV or "hanging out" in a shopping mall, eating junk food. "Life-style" DOES make a difference! > But what if we(thinner) folks drink milk every day and also eat lots of > other forms of calcium? I'm not trying to buck the posts, but I doubt being > overweight has any real benefit over not being overweight. Being overweight is associated with a lower risk of osteoporosis, which is a real benefit. I can't think of another one, aside from having reserves to draw on should you be unable to eat for a long time - trapped by a blizzard or something. > I did find the post amusing; I like to eat, too. I simply have a genetic > predisposition to being short and skinny. But Mom wears a size 0 or 2 and > thinks I'm "fat" because I wear a size 6 or 8. I suppose when I'm 79 (if I > live that long) I'll be back to a size 2, too.) There are a lot of factors affecting whether or not any individual will develop many diseases. Not all skinny women will get osteoporosis, and not all fat ones will avoid getting it. There are a number of other factors, and I know the local doctors here like to have all their female patients, fat and thin, get a bone density scan as soon as they turn fifty. Still, skinny white women, especially skinny white women with a poor diet lacking in calcium and vitamins and who don't do weight-bearing exercise, are at the most risk of osteoporosis. And what seems to be most unfair is that they really should start building up their bones years and years before they usually start worrying about them. So the best time to strengthen your bones is when you are young, strong and think you are immortal anyway, so why bother? SignatureCheryl > There are a lot of factors affecting whether or not any individual will > develop many diseases. Not all skinny women will get osteoporosis, and not [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > is when you are young, strong and think you are immortal anyway, so why > bother? I'm 27, and I asked about a bone density exam at my last physical. I sweat a lot and do a lot of exercise that's not weight bearing, like cycling. Apparently, professional cyclists have awful bone density, and every hour you sweat intensely, you lose about as much calcium as is present in a cup of milk. I'm not a pro cyclist, but it was still something to think about. Anyway, my doctor told me that bone density really isn't a useful number. Some people naturally have denser bones than others; the question is, at what rate do they lose that density as they get older? So a test at 50 and again at 52 is useful. A single test at 27 could only serve to freak me out. All they can really say is, make sure you get plenty of calcium and do weight bearing exercise. They can say that without giving me the test. Signaturemonique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eros was adopted! Eros has a home now! *cheer!* >>>> One more advantage: >>>> [quoted text clipped - 27 lines] > > Jill You just have to be extra careful since you are in a high risk group. Make sure you get enough sunshine and Vit D so you can use the calcium and enough weight bearing exercise to keep your bones strong. Plus a risk factor is only that. Kind of like gambling with a point spread. Not a certainty. I have osteopenia. I'm heavy but was thin growing up, took too much prednisone over the years and have all Scot or Brit ancestors. Jo I don't want to go on a huge rant, because for me this is a sensitive subject since my mom is a personal trainer and is ALWAYS on me about my weight. But here's my two cents For the last 2-3 years I have had to listen to my mother, father AND brother talk about the horrors and dangers of type 2 diabetes and how I am at a huge risk because I'm overweight. Mom and Dad are convinced about the stupid Body Mass Index and since I'm five feet tall, I should be close to 100 pounds. I am 26, five feet tall, and currently weigh 137 pounds. Currently I am doing springboard diving training 5 times a week and some of those days are double practices(morning and evening). I haven't been really losing any weight, but I can definitely tell that I'm getting stronger and toning up. But my mother feels this is still a problem because I'm not losing weight. Oh boo hoo (with major sarcasm) I know that I'm gaining muscle, so I'm not really that worried. About a year or two ago I got so fed up with her lectures and her mailing me articles on Type 2 diabetes, I finally went to my doctor for a blood test. The doctor looked at the results during my physical and said, "Your blood sugar is 86, and though you are in a high risk group (Asian and slightly overweight) you are in no danger. So what do I have to do to convince you that you don't have type 2 diabetes?" I said "it's not ME that needs the convincing!!" My mom doesn't believe me doctor and claims he's not reading the latest research. So I faxed her a copy of my blood test. That still didn't shut her up. I know all about osteoporosis, and yes mom I know I'm getting older you don't have to remind me! I'm training a lot as it is, and I feel just fine. Sure I could lose about 10 pounds, but I'm not going to stress out about it. I have a LOT more things to worry about, like not getting depressed because I don't have a boyfriend and its almost February (but that's another rant) I think what really ticks me off is no matter what I say to my mother, she's never going to stop harping on me. *sigh* I could be rich, have a loving husband, be skinny as a rake and totally happy, and I know she would STILL find something to rant about. grrrrrrrrrrrr............ Okay, that's enough......breathe breathe breathe........go cuddle a kitty..... Kristi > I don't want to go on a huge rant, because for me this is a sensitive > subject since my mom is a personal trainer and is ALWAYS on me about my [quoted text clipped - 48 lines] > > Kristi Wow. You're mom is definitely paranoid. You are doing fine. And I certainly don't think you qualify as "fat". No wonder you like being at school! >> I don't want to go on a huge rant, because for me this is a sensitive >> subject since my mom is a personal trainer and is ALWAYS on me about my [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] >> >> I am 26, five feet tall, and currently weigh 137 pounds. 137 sounds like a healthy size. Try not to listen to people who criticize that. I think women with curves are much prettier than reed-thin models. Sherry >> I don't want to go on a huge rant, because for me this is a sensitive >> subject since my mom is a personal trainer and is ALWAYS on me about [quoted text clipped - 54 lines] >Wow. You're mom is definitely paranoid. You are doing fine. And I certainly >don't think you qualify as "fat". No wonder you like being at school! Muscular people weigh more muscle weighs more. Female athletes weigh more, but have little fat. Suz Macmoosette =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= "People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life." --Faith Resnick |\__/| (=':'=) (")_(") > I think what really ticks me off is no matter what I say to my mother, > she's never going to stop harping on me. *sigh* I could be rich, have [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > > Kristi WOW, your mom is really out there, isn't she. Can someone slip her a major dose of valium? Pam S. with great sympathy I don't know what medication she's on, but she's partly the reason why I'm on antidepressents. and yes, this is why I decided to move to Los Angeles and why I only go home 2-3 times a year. At least she is a bit better now. I don't feel like reaching through the phone and strangling her........at least not EVERY time........ Okay, gettin worked up again.......must find a kitty to cuddle............. Thanks for your support guys. I must admit, everyone I've told this to agree that my mom is totally OUT THERE!!! Kristi > I don't know what medication she's on, but she's partly the reason why > I'm on antidepressents. [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] > > Kristi Rob is still laughing at the idea of you being overweight. I understand bout the anti-depressants. Rob's mom was so out there before Rob and I got married that I ended up on them until we left Lewiston and moved away to Kentucky. I ended up in counseling due to parental abuse and emotional and mental abuse from my idiot half-sister. Relatives are the main reason cats created themselves, in my opinion. Pam S. >I don't know what medication she's on, but she's partly the reason why > I'm on antidepressents. [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] > > Kristi Well, you're not exactly "massive" are you? Take no notice if you're happy with your weight yourself. Unless there is an unusual medical problem we all know exactly what causes overweight: consuming more calories each day than we use up. When I had depression last year, I lost 42lbs and became underweight. I could simply not be bothered to prepare food for myself. My aunt saved me from fading away by insisting I went there for a huge Sunday dinner and sent me home with at least 2 days food to microwave. This proved to me that if I ate hardly anything, I'd lose weight and I certainly did. This isn't a good idea. Reducing calories eaten and increasing calories expended has to work better. I really do think it's as simple as that. Tweed Perhaps it is a family tradition. But, sometimes one has to break with tradition and do one's own choice. SignatureChristopher A. Young Learn more about Jesus www.lds.org www.mormons.com "Tanada" <tanada@nospamearthlink.net> wrote in message news:bCFId.4554 WOW, your mom is really out there, isn't she. Can someone slip her a major dose of valium? Pam S. with great sympathy In the US we have a couple expressions which I'm far too polite to use on an open forum. The general direction is that at age 26, your Mom should not be regulating your life. At some point, you may wish to stop defending your decisions to your Mom. "Mom, I really love you, but you raised me to go out into the world and make it on my own. I think that's my decison to make." SignatureChristopher A. Young Learn more about Jesus www.lds.org www.mormons.com I don't want to go on a huge rant, because for me this is a sensitive subject since my mom is a personal trainer and is ALWAYS on me about my weight. But here's my two cents For the last 2-3 years I have had to listen to my mother, father AND brother talk about the horrors and dangers of type 2 diabetes and how I am at a huge risk because I'm overweight. Mom and Dad are convinced about the stupid Body Mass Index and since I'm five feet tall, I should be close to 100 pounds. I am 26, five feet tall, and currently weigh 137 pounds. Currently I am doing springboard diving training 5 times a week and some of those days are double practices(morning and evening). I haven't been really losing any weight, but I can definitely tell that I'm getting stronger and toning up. But my mother feels this is still a problem because I'm not losing weight. Oh boo hoo (with major sarcasm) I know that I'm gaining muscle, so I'm not really that worried. About a year or two ago I got so fed up with her lectures and her mailing me articles on Type 2 diabetes, I finally went to my doctor for a blood test. The doctor looked at the results during my physical and said, "Your blood sugar is 86, and though you are in a high risk group (Asian and slightly overweight) you are in no danger. So what do I have to do to convince you that you don't have type 2 diabetes?" I said "it's not ME that needs the convincing!!" My mom doesn't believe me doctor and claims he's not reading the latest research. So I faxed her a copy of my blood test. That still didn't shut her up. I know all about osteoporosis, and yes mom I know I'm getting older you don't have to remind me! I'm training a lot as it is, and I feel just fine. Sure I could lose about 10 pounds, but I'm not going to stress out about it. I have a LOT more things to worry about, like not getting depressed because I don't have a boyfriend and its almost February (but that's another rant) I think what really ticks me off is no matter what I say to my mother, she's never going to stop harping on me. *sigh* I could be rich, have a loving husband, be skinny as a rake and totally happy, and I know she would STILL find something to rant about. grrrrrrrrrrrr............ Okay, that's enough......breathe breathe breathe........go cuddle a kitty..... Kristi > I don't want to go on a huge rant, because for me this is a sensitive > subject since my mom is a personal trainer and is ALWAYS on me about my [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] > Oh boo hoo (with major sarcasm) I know that I'm gaining muscle, so I'm not > really that worried. [rest of sad story snipped] If your mother is truly a personal trainer and truly thinks that BMI or absolute weight are enough to guage fitness, then I hope she finds a new career. As far as I'm concerned, that's malpractice. The worst is that she's not only spewing this misinformation to you, she's also apparently doing this to paying clients! [snip more badmouthing because she is your mother and I don't want to upset you] Way too many women run away from healthy exercise regimens because they're maintaining or gaining weight, even though they are losing inches, have better tone, and are becoming more fit. A friend of mine said it best, I think. It really stuck with me. He said, guaging your fitness by stepping on the scale is like weighing your car to figure out how much gas is in the tank. The numbers are related, but there are way too many factors involved for it to be effective. Signaturemonique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eros was adopted! Eros has a home now! *cheer!* > > I don't want to go on a huge rant, because for me this is a sensitive > > subject since my mom is a personal trainer and is ALWAYS on me about my [quoted text clipped - 32 lines] > figure out how much gas is in the tank. The numbers are related, but there > are way too many factors involved for it to be effective. Yes, I agree. BMI is way too inaccurate, especially for anyone with muscles. A personal trainer should know that, but sadly nowadays anyone can call themselves a personal trainer. It would be much more useful to go by bodyfat %age, but of course bodyfat is difficult to measure accurately and cheaply. -- Britta Sandpaper kisses, a cuddle and a purr. I have an alarm clock that's covered in fur! Check out pictures of Vino at: http://photos.yahoo.com/badwilson click on the Vino album > Yes, I agree. BMI is way too inaccurate, especially for anyone with > muscles. A personal trainer should know that, but sadly nowadays > anyone can call themselves a personal trainer. > It would be much more useful to go by bodyfat %age, but of course > bodyfat is difficult to measure accurately and cheaply. No kidding! And bodyfat gets more difficult the more fat you actually have. I bought a caliper and even built myself a spreadsheet with the appropriate formulae, but getting the same spot is tricky, and you really have to have someone else do the measuring, so I had to rope Eric into doing it for me. Honestly, I don't need a caliper at this point to know I need to lose fat. (I wish I could eradicate the term "lose weight" from the English language. It's so misleading!) IMO the best way to tell if you're losing bodyfat is to see what pants fit around your waist, and how snugly. Legs can be problematic if you're doing a lot of work with them, though ... Signaturemonique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eros was adopted! Eros has a home now! *cheer!* > > Yes, I agree. BMI is way too inaccurate, especially for anyone with > > muscles. A personal trainer should know that, but sadly nowadays [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] > around your waist, and how snugly. Legs can be problematic if you're doing a > lot of work with them, though ... Yes, I use the pants test too. Or how much of a roll I can grab below my belly button. Ick. -- Britta Sandpaper kisses, a cuddle and a purr. I have an alarm clock that's covered in fur! Check out pictures of Vino at: http://photos.yahoo.com/badwilson click on the Vino album >>>>> One more advantage: >>>>> [quoted text clipped - 31 lines] > You just have to be extra careful since you are in a high risk group. > Make sure you get enough sunshine Sunshine? I know, but I avoid the sun like the plague. I burn at the drop of a hat. I have to wear 40 SPF sunscreen. I'm clearly representative of my Scottish ancestry. Jill >>>>>> One more advantage: >>>>>> [quoted text clipped - 38 lines] > > Jill Ten minutes a day is plenty. In good weather it is almost impossible to get less than that. In the winter its worth sitting outside for just a little while. This is partly how us Scots got such thin bones, We don't tend to be sun worshipers. Jo > I just did a quick search on Google with the words "osteoporosis likely > obese thin". There is plenty of info on the net on big ppl not getting [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > those who are heavier, and obese people have lower rates of bone loss than > those who are ideal weight. UNQUOTE A BMI of 21 is on the low end of normal ... but imo the BMI thing is a copout, anyway. A bodybuilder will have a high BMI because they have a lot of muscle, not because they are fat. Percentage of body fat is a much more useful number, but is harder to measure. Signaturemonique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eros was adopted! Eros has a home now! *cheer!* > > I just did a quick search on Google with the words "osteoporosis likely > > obese thin". There is plenty of info on the net on big ppl not getting [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > not because they are fat. Percentage of body fat is a much more useful > number, but is harder to measure. LOL! I just wrote an almost identical post. I wrote it before I read this one, honest ;-) -- Britta Sandpaper kisses, a cuddle and a purr. I have an alarm clock that's covered in fur! Check out pictures of Vino at: http://photos.yahoo.com/badwilson click on the Vino album > LOL! I just wrote an almost identical post. I wrote it before I read > this one, honest ;-) Hey, great minds really *do* think alike! Signaturemonique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eros was adopted! Eros has a home now! *cheer!* >A BMI of 21 is on the low end of normal ... but imo the BMI thing is a copout, >anyway. A bodybuilder will have a high BMI because they have a lot of muscle, >not because they are fat. Percentage of body fat is a much more useful >number, but is harder to measure. Indeed. The rugby player, Jonah Lomu (sp?) apparently had a BMI of somewhere near 30. I believe that's classed as "obese". Pity the foolish person that would have the nerve to go up to him and tell him that! SignatureCathi >> One more advantage: >> >> Hefty women are less likely than thin women to get osteoporosis. > Really? I would have thought the opposite, since they(we) > put more strain on the skeletal structure. No, it's not caused by strain, but maybe by hormone levels and other things that aren't well understood IIRC. Diet comes into it, and excercise. Small skinny white women are the ones at the highest risk for osteoporosis, especially if they don't eat well and never do weight-bearing exercise. Strain on the joints, especially knees, now that's something that might be more common in larger than smaller women. SignatureCheryl >>> One more advantage: >>> [quoted text clipped - 13 lines] >be >more common in larger than smaller women. Heavy women produce more estrogen. Women with low estrogen levels loose more bone. Suz Macmoosette =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= "People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life." --Faith Resnick |\__/| (=':'=) (")_(") >> One more advantage: >> >> Hefty women are less likely than thin women to get osteoporosis. > > Really? I would have thought the opposite, since they(we) put more strain > on the skeletal structure. Yes, but exercise makes for strong bones. And we do get enough calcium along with everything else. Jo >> Hefty women are less likely than thin women to get osteoporosis. > > Really? I would have thought the opposite, since they(we) put more strain > on the skeletal structure. Evelyn> Weight bearing exercise, such as walking, will help protect against bone loss. This is what my doctor tells me. I think the strain on the bones it beneficial, but if you are overweight, it's probably hard on the ligaments and joints. I can't explain all the physiology involved, but that's the way it is. Annie, who is waiting for the results of a bone density scan. >>> Hefty women are less likely than thin women to get osteoporosis. >> [quoted text clipped - 12 lines] > > Annie, who is waiting for the results of a bone density scan. Yup. As I understand it, strain on the skeletal structure is good; strain on the joints, though ... I can definitely tell that I need to lose a few pounds. My knees are making that very clear. Signaturemonique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eros was adopted! Eros has a home now! *cheer!* I agree with every point! :) SignatureChristine in Vantaa, Finland christal63 (at) yahoo (dot) com photos: http://photos.yahoo.com/christal63 Loved it! Thanks. Best wishes, SignaturePolonca & Soncek > I was rummaging through some old school papers when I found this homework > from English Literature during my freshman year of college - 28 years ago (I [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > > 1. Starving tends to be painful. <snip> A masterful exposition. Of course, I can't really understand it as I seem to have willpower to burn: I've been on a gradual treat-free more-exercise weight-loss programme for exactly 2 years and have trimmed down from 228 lbs (103.4 kilos) to 182 lbs (82.5 kilos), which is my weight from 20 years ago and is ideal for me (allegedly). Mind you, I reckon that if I can do it - I'm as much of a treat-seeking missile as any fury master - anyone can, given the incentive (high blood pressure and too much weight compressing my lumbar spine in my case). So good luck to anybody who tries. Gordon & the TT (aka Drogon from Proxima Alpha Centauri) > "Why I Am Not Thin" by Lori Crews > > 1. Starving tends to be painful. Splendid! Well written. I forwarded it to a couple friends. In my case, it's hereditary. I'm the same size as my dad, grandfather, etc. SignatureChristopher A. Young Learn more about Jesus www.lds.org www.mormons.com I was rummaging through some old school papers when I found this homework from English Literature during my freshman year of college - 28 years ago (I delayed going back to school until my daughter was 5 and I have some other stories about the kids and motherhood if you're interested). I thought you might get a kick out of it. ================================================================ "Why I Am Not Thin" by Lori Crews 1. Starving tends to be painful. Anyone who is overweight knows the desperation that can come in the middle of the night when all the food stores and carry out "quick eats" are closed and suddenly "it" strikes. "It" is a craving for something, *anything* fattening. You can assuage your hunger without going out in only one way - become pregnant. Any good father-to-be will travel 15 miles at three in the morning to satisfy the craving of a mother-to-be. But since it is difficult to remain pregnant for any length of time, a food-aholic must develop other resources. I tried to convince my husband that my eating binges were post-partum cravings, but when my youngest child was four years old, he stopped believing that. 2. To be thin you have to diet. Talking about diets is boring. There's nothing worse than being caught in a conversation with a chronic fad dieter. Not only do you have to hear about each mouthful of cottage cheese, but you're also subjected to detailed descriptions of each food's effect on various bodily functions. Attending a "Fatties Anonymous" meeting is about as interesting as sitting in the front row of a proctologist's lecture! 3. I like food and eating. I hate it when people ask me why I eat so much (a thin person's basic question). Aside from having a life-long love affair with food and the will power of a gnat, there are many logical reasons why I eat. I eat when I'm nervous. I eat when I'm depressed. I eat when I'm angry. I eat when I'm happy. In fact, the only time I don't eat is when I'm asleep. I don't sleep enough. And I can never, never leave leftovers on the table. What would all those starving people in India do if I didn't eat all the food on my plate? 4. It's not my fault. Thin people don't know this, but there's a conspiracy in American television to keep fat people fat. Have you ever noticed that as soon as you go on a diet the steak and finger lobster commercial is run two hundred and fifty-six times a day? That's a total of one thousand, seven hundred and ninety-two times the first week of your diet, not even counting all the Big Macs, frozen pizzas, and talking ice cream freezers all us urging you to try me, fry me, *buy* me! 5. I don't want to be thin. Thin people make me nervous. They move around a lot faster than fat people. You just know that if a fire breaks out in your crowded building all the thin people will be out before a fat person can get out of his chair. Burning to death would be a painful way to lose weight. 6. I have no will power I can't believe that humans, frail and fallible as we are, can have the will power it take to be thin. There's something unnatural about a person who can refuse a chocolate ?clair without drooling all over her host's carpet. I have a theory that thin people are really alien spies sent from Alpha Centuri some years back to invade Earth. The brought with them two of their most powerful weapons: Cholesterol and Cellulite! I can't think of any other logical explanation for all those thinnies. 7. Being fat can be a good thing. Most people don't realize that being fat has a lot of advantages (well, maybe two). If you're a fat woman's libber, you won't have that awful problem of being treated as a sex object. And a fat person doesn't have to worry about what to wear - there are only three dresses on the size 24 rack. 8. Never mind! I guess there's no real reason for writing this paper. If you're a fat person you already know all the suffering of a Monday dieter. You know what it's like to go pale and weak at the sight of a bathroom scale. And if you're a thin person... please go back to Alpha Centuri! ================================================================= Hugs, CatNipped |
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