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Cat Forum / Cat Anecdotes / January 2005[OT] Away for a while and a rant
Posting a quickie just so you won't think I am (or Sammy is) being rude. RL is kicking my @$$ right now. In fact, if you don't mind, a need to rant a bit... <rant> A year ago I lost my job as a web architect and since the bottom had fallen out of this job market, couldn't find another job doing this. After 4 months of unemployment, I decided to take a job as an Executive Assistant. I had to take half the pay I was getting, but I figured, hey, at least I won't have the job stress associated with the higher salary. Unfortunately, part of my job duties as an EI was to update their web site. Well, updating the web site quickly became extensively high-end programming. *BUT*, my salary is still half of what it was and I'm still required to do all of the EI duties (step and fetch it type stuff), PLUS they gave me 15 different vendors to handle, and just about everything else that the 20+ people they just laid off were doing. So now I'm: - Going to get the mail and sorting and distributing it (a whole mail bin every day) - Doing personal chores for my CEO (paying his traffic tickets, filling out his kids' insurance forms, renewing his passport, running down to his car to fetch things for him, etc. - ad nauseum) - All meeting presentations in PowerPoint - All Excel spreadsheets with Visual Basic macros - External and internal contact information - All correspondence - email and snail mail - All FedEx-ing, faxing, and scanning of documents - All filing - Answering the telephones - Taking care of all repairs of all telephone, cellular, and computing equipment - Coding invoices for 15 different vendors for accounts payable processing - Taking care of resolving invoice problems for 15 different vendors - Creating all graphics, multi-media, interactive forms, and code for a 250+ page web site - Filming and editing a safety orientation video for the company I feel like I'm going to drop dead from exhaustion - I'm going crazy with stress. For instance, they gave me the project of creating a Safety program on our web site that is about 25 pages of interactive forms using 10+ tables in a SQL database, and editing about 700+ pages of Safety forms that need to be put on the web for downloading. When I worked for a web services company as a consultant, years ago, the web service company would have taken the job and put 4 people to work on it, given the client a 3 month time frame for completion, and charged the client $100,000 for the job. I was given it a few days ago and told the roll-out date is February 1, 2005! I've been working 16-hour days and this is the first time I've forced myself to take a break to come read the group a bit. </rant> I promise to take some time this weekend to write a couple of "With Mommy" stories. Hugs, CatNipped I'd say put Sammy on the case. =o) (If you get REALLY fed up with these cheap greed heads who lay people off and then expect one underpaid person to do the work of 20 people, and are on the verge of quitting yourself.) Some possible titles Emptying the Mail Bin with Mommy Scanning Documents with Mommy Shredding the Boss's Parking Ticket with My Very Own Claws Doing Power Point Presentations with Mommy. Just kidding, as I realize you're under stress. But it sounds like you either need to rebel, or find a new, more reasonable job, or both. Melissa > I'd say put Sammy on the case. =o) (If you get REALLY fed up with these > cheap greed heads who lay people off and then expect one underpaid [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] > either need to rebel, or find a new, more reasonable job, or both. > Melissa I know! Like Dr. Phil says, people treat you the way you allow them to treat you. The problem, *MY* problem, is many-fold. I have ADHD and am a bit (OK, a lot) obsessive compulsive - in other words, I not only want everything I do to be perfect, but I usually have the energy to keep working at it until it is. I have a *VERY* hard time saying, "I can't do that." So, they keep piling things on and I keep just doing them (and as far as the web architecture, I do it so fast and make it look so easy that they, techno-plegics that they are, have *NO* idea of just what an intense, complicated job I'm doing). I just keep moving faster, and faster, and faster - until I just can't go any faster without breaking the sound barrier! The thing that gets to me the most, I think, is my sh*t-head boss yelling at me for things that I have no control over. We have problems with our telephone lines breaking. Even though I am responsible for getting the phones lines fixed, I can't fix them myself. He was on the phone today and his long distance call was dropped and he screamed out at me (my desk is right outside his office), "GET THESE F*CKING PHONES FIXED NOW!!!!" Well, I had called the phone company - 6 times - but they still hadn't gotten out there yet. He's always yelling at me for something like this - while I'm trying to code a very complicated page for a project that has a deadline of two weeks! Sigh, I'm ranting again - sorry! Hugs, CatNipped >> I'd say put Sammy on the case. =o) (If you get REALLY fed up with these >> cheap greed heads who lay people off and then expect one underpaid [quoted text clipped - 43 lines] > > CatNipped Digging out one of my old sayings: "If you will -- you may". MLB > Digging out one of my old sayings: "If you will -- you may". MLB I'm dumb; explain please? (I was going to ask for an explanation in smaller words, but, um ...)  Signaturemonique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eros was adopted! Eros has a home now! *cheer!* >> Digging out one of my old sayings: "If you will -- you may". MLB > > I'm dumb; explain please? > > (I was going to ask for an explanation in smaller words, but, um ...) That was as small as possible. Here it is with more words: If you are willing to put up with the c*ap, they are willing to let you. MLB > I know! Like Dr. Phil says, people treat you the way you allow them to > treat you. The problem, *MY* problem, is many-fold. I have ADHD and am a [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > faster - until I just can't go any faster without breaking the sound > barrier! Heh. I have the same problem from a different angle. I easily get distracted from work, so if I'm behind schedule, I feel like it's my fault, so I should somehow be able to fix it. Not always possible. Besides, for every two days where I get half as much done as everyone else, I work a day where I get four times as much done as everyone else. I just can't seem to keep a consistent work habit. I also work best after-hours in an environment where all my co-workers are earlybirds, but that's another issue ... > The thing that gets to me the most, I think, is my sh*t-head boss yelling at > me for things that I have no control over. We have problems with our [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > trying to code a very complicated page for a project that has a deadline of > two weeks! Here is where you really do need to say no. Your boss is being verbally abusive. Tell him in calm tones that you are working on it, but that you don't deserve to be treated this way. Of course, only you can decide if it's worth the risk to stand up to your boss. But if I were doing the work you're doing, with the added stress of a boss like that, I'd be sick constantly. To me, my health is worth more to me than the paycheck. I agree with whoever said that it's easiest to get a job when you already have one. It's hard to aggressively job hunt when you're working full time (let alone double time as you are), but you need to somehow find that time. > Sigh, I'm ranting again - sorry! Can't speak for anyone else, but I don't mind. I hope your situation improves. Signaturemonique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eros was adopted! Eros has a home now! *cheer!* > Here is where you really do need to say no. Your boss is being > verbally abusive. Tell him in calm tones that you are working > on it, but that you don't deserve to be treated this way. And, as women who have male bosses, we have to remember to treat them as males. Men in the work place don't typically deal well with emotion, especially if the workplace is also stressful for them in their position. They deal with facts. It's best to write down your grievances ahead of time on a daily planner, or a notebook, and refer to it during the meeting. Stick with the facts, leave emotions out. No whining. It just doesn't work with them. Husbands are a different "breed" because they *have* to live with you. lol And, they're more inclined to work with you. SignatureCheryl /who has had to learn to curb emotions in the workplace >> Here is where you really do need to say no. Your boss is being >> verbally abusive. Tell him in calm tones that you are working [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > "breed" because they *have* to live with you. lol And, they're more > inclined to work with you. YOu know, it just occurred to me, but I've never really dealt with a male boss. There are male bosses at my work,but they aren't really my immediate superiors. But I have an outstanding supervisor (female) who if she left, I probably would because our boss boss is much too difficult and I don't believe I would get another super in that position who could deal with the pressure from her like this one does and it would be hell for the rest of us. I've been very fortunate I think. >> Here is where you really do need to say no. Your boss is being >> verbally abusive. Tell him in calm tones that you are working [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > to it during the meeting. Stick with the facts, leave emotions out. > No whining. It just doesn't work with them. Good advice. Unfortunately, when I get very tense or angry if I try to speak I start to cry. Doesn't matter if I'm talking with a male or female, 'superior' or not. So in this situation, if at all possible, it's best for me to not attempt to address an issue until I've had a chance to cool off. This isn't always possible in the workplace when an immediate response is called for. Jill > Good advice. Unfortunately, when I get very tense or angry if I try to > speak I start to cry. Doesn't matter if I'm talking with a male or female, > 'superior' or not. So in this situation, if at all possible, it's best for > me to not attempt to address an issue until I've had a chance to cool off. > This isn't always possible in the workplace when an immediate response is > called for. When I'm really I angry, I also cry. Weird. Then I get angry at myself for crying and looking weak when what I really want to do is beat the snot out of the offender. I've never had a boss who put me through the kinds of things you've described. I've had a boss disappoint me before, but I scheduled time to talk to him, told him what was bothering me, and he apologized. Not the same type of situation at all, it seems. (Then again, I was calling him on one specific lapse, not on recurring behavior.) Signaturemonique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eros was adopted! Eros has a home now! *cheer!* >> Good advice. Unfortunately, when I get very tense or angry if I try >> to speak I start to cry. > When I'm really I angry, I also cry. Weird. Then I get angry at > myself for crying and looking weak when what I really want to do is > beat the snot out of the offender. I know that feeling! > I've never had a boss who put me through the kinds of things you've > described. Actually it was Catnipped's boss who was cussing at her, and I've only had that happen one time. Strangely, it was a former Army guy who was CFO of a (surprise!) now defunct company. He called me into his office one day because an automated backup on one of the Unix systems had failed. Even with the door closed it had to be apparent to everyone because he was shouting at the top of his lungs "What the FU** happened?!" I took a deep breath, looked him in the eye and said, "Do you want me to quit? Because I'll walk out of here right now. No one talks to me like this." He lost his bluster and mumbled something like, "Go back to work." It was the one time I was able to contain the tears and just spit it back at him. I only stayed there for 1 year - couldn't have taken much more of that assinine behavior. Jill > >> Good advice. Unfortunately, when I get very tense or angry if I try > >> to speak I start to cry. [quoted text clipped - 23 lines] > > Jill Don't these people realize that in today's climate you could probably be sued over verbally insulting an employee like this? I mean, really? >>>> Good advice. Unfortunately, when I get very tense or angry if I >>>> try to speak I start to cry. [quoted text clipped - 27 lines] > Don't these people realize that in today's climate you could probably > be sued over verbally insulting an employee like this? I mean, really? Perhaps in today's climate. And in Lori's situation I'd sure say something. My situation occurred 15 years ago when people weren't so easily able to sue over something like this. Oh, and my CFO boss brought a witness in so he could cuss me out with impunity, if that makes any sense. She was simply going to back up whatever he chose to do. Of course, this is the same place where I was handed a note by one of the route supervisors which said, "When can I get in your pants?" I guess THAT jerk realized the serious implications because when I tried to walk off with it he grabbed it away from me. Jill >> >> Good advice. Unfortunately, when I get very tense or angry if I try >> >> to speak I start to cry. [quoted text clipped - 31 lines] > Don't these people realize that in today's climate you could probably be > sued over verbally insulting an employee like this? I mean, really? Actually, no they really can't be *successfully* sued. I talked to a lawyer once when a supervisor told me that the only way I was going to move in the company was "horizontally". You have to have witnesses (and very few employees are going to risk their jobs testifying for another employee. You have to have a proven "trend" that the company has been allowing this to go on for a while. It's *EXTREMELY* hard to prove a case of sexual harrassment (or any other type of harrassment) - the movies and TV make more of it than what's reality. Hugs, CatNipped >> I'd say put Sammy on the case. =o) (If you get REALLY fed up with these >> cheap greed heads who lay people off and then expect one underpaid [quoted text clipped - 43 lines] > > CatNipped With people like that you just need to remain as calm as possible and present them with the facts and then ask them, just what would you like ME to do. I will gladly help you, but what is it that *I* can do beyond what I have done. > The thing that gets to me the most, I think, is my sh*t-head boss yelling at > me for things that I have no control over. We have problems with our [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > trying to code a very complicated page for a project that has a deadline of > two weeks/// No offence, but your boss sounds like a complete A$$HOLE. Is there anyway that you can sit down and ask for a payrise/help/etc or will they just ignore you? >> The thing that gets to me the most, I think, is my sh*t-head boss yelling >> at [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] > anyway that you can sit down and ask for a payrise/help/etc or will they > just ignore you? They were at the point of bankruptcy and just pulled their nuts out of the fire by merging with another company. They laid off *ALL* the support staff here in Houston and only kept me because of my technical skills. They know that there is *NOTHING* to be had job-wise in my field (web programming) in the states - which is why I took the job as an Executive Assistant here in the first place, so they know that I can't find another job doing what I love and would have to take less money at a less rewarding job (not being able to do web programming would kill me). So they take advantage and I let them take advantage because I can at lease do what I love to do (http://www.cgini.com/)! Hugs, CatNipped >>> The thing that gets to me the most, I think, is my sh*t-head boss >>> yelling at [quoted text clipped - 24 lines] > > CatNipped I just forwarded you an email sent to me by Jeanne. It's right up your alley and in the States. And, while I will be checking into jobs through temp agencies, your situation is the kind of thing I'm afraid of. I'd still try to find some way to say to your boss yelling at you doesn't help when it's a problem outside your scope of being able to fix. Either that, or every time you (to use your example) call the phone company, interrupt him to tell him you called the phone company. ;) Jill > > I'd say put Sammy on the case. =o) (If you get REALLY fed up with these > > cheap greed heads who lay people off and then expect one underpaid [quoted text clipped - 43 lines] > > CatNipped Tell him what you have done re the phones then ask him what he wants the priorities to be -- if it's the phones then ask him who he'd like to do the coding while you're busy with the phone issue. Christine (feeling feistier) > I'd say put Sammy on the case. =o) (If you get REALLY fed up with these > cheap greed heads who lay people off and then expect one underpaid [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] > either need to rebel, or find a new, more reasonable job, or both. > Melissa Or certainly tell them what you told us about the realities of what they are asking for and what they are getting at a cut rate price. I mean, with all you do, it's not like they will fire you, so maybe a little straight talk is in order. Purrs for stress relief. > Or certainly tell them what you told us about the realities of what they are > asking for and what they are getting at a cut rate price. I mean, with all > you do, it's not like they will fire you, so maybe a little straight talk is > in order. Purrs for stress relief. I agree. One of two things is going on. 1) They know damn well how much work you're doing and are happy to let you work yourself to death while they save money 2) They're so naive that they *don't* understand how much they've asked you to do Either way, the only way to enact change is to take a stand. I'd recommend actually scheduling a meeting with your boss and having an agenda prepared ahead of time. I am always afraid to admit that I can't finish something within the deadline allotted, no matter how unrealistic the schedule is. But I've found that my boss is actually pretty flexible if I talk to him. The trick, though, is that he has a lot of things on his plate, so unless I tell him about it, he's not going to know. Signaturemonique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eros was adopted! Eros has a home now! *cheer!* > I'd say put Sammy on the case. =o) (If you get REALLY fed up with these > cheap greed heads who lay people off and then expect one underpaid [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] > either need to rebel, or find a new, more reasonable job, or both. > Melissa What Melissa said -- if you're that good at what you do you're probably quite indispensable to them and I wonder about using that as a point to negotiate to get either or all of -- a pay raise an assistant a clear understanding of what you can and cannot do for these people based on the number of hours in a day you are able to work all of the above? And now you need hot chocolate, a massage, medicinal purrs, and a bubble bath! hugs and purrs Christine (feelin' feisty on your behalf) Time to look for another job. I learned the hard way about that. My advice (FWIW) You will find it easier to find another job when you're already in work. Do it. We don't need stress at work, rather a nice working environment. I hope you find a new nice job soon. I had major stress at work last year. My doctor told me he would support me if they didn't do anything about it should I want to take out a legal case, it was that serious. I told them that. I am back at work now. They are falling over themselves to accommodate me. Good. About time :) LOL. Got them. Tweed > Posting a quickie just so you won't think I am (or Sammy is) being rude. > [quoted text clipped - 69 lines] > > CatNipped > completion, and charged the client $100,000 for the job. I was given it a > few days ago and told the roll-out date is February 1, 2005! I've been > working 16-hour days and this is the first time I've forced myself to take a > break to come read the group a bit. That is insane! Why do these people never have an understanding of the amoutn of effort and time needed to develop large projects like that? You most definitely have my sympathy and understanding. I don't have to deal with the insane workload you do since nobody expects truck drivers to do anything more than drive. But I do know what it's like to have to get by on much less income than usual. This driving job will end up paying about 1/3 of what I used to make as a programmer. Definitely sucks. You, too, will be on my purr list. Oh, my. We're sending new-job and stress-easing purrs your way. ------ Krista > Posting a quickie just so you won't think I am (or Sammy is) being > rude. [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > figured, hey, at least I won't have the job stress associated with > the higher salary. Soothing stress relief purrs on the way. Give little (big) Sammy a hug and a kiss. Jill I've been in jobs where I was overworked, and sometimes I was too much of a perfectionist and put a lot of the burden on myself. Things got pretty bad before I admitted I just couldn't take it any more. I accepted enormous pay cuts and short-term and part-time contracts just to get a bit of money and a foot in the door of a new employer. I'm now on a full-time, one year contract, like the work, am treated very well by co-workers and employers, and think I am very fortunate, even though I am still earning far less than I was. Unemployment is scary and frightening, particularly if you are the sole earner in your home, but it isn't the end of the world, and it is possible to get through it. I would suggest (1) line up a job, if possible, before the current one ends or becomes impossible (I didn't do this) and (2) be open to what you will accept - consider lower pay, a different field than your previous work, etc. But there is life on the other side of rotten jobs and unemployment! SignatureCheryl >Posting a quickie just so you won't think I am (or Sammy is) being rude. > [quoted text clipped - 67 lines] > >CatNipped It sounds like they are taking advantage of the high unemployment rate and snapped up an overqualified person to take underpay and overwork. Purrs that a better job happens. Suz Macmoosette =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= "People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life." --Faith Resnick |\__/| (=':'=) (")_(") >>Posting a quickie just so you won't think I am (or Sammy is) being rude. >> [quoted text clipped - 80 lines] > Suz > Macmoosette Yep, you said it much better than I did, but that's exactly what I just said in a little while ago in another post. I've been constantly looking for another job since I started this one and there's just nothing in my field out there. Hugs, CatNipped > =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= > [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > (=':'=) > (")_(") |
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