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uhoh -- adoption advice needed

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Monique Y. Mudama - 30 Dec 2004 21:49 GMT
So, as some of you may know, I have a cat named Oscar.  I had a cat named Eros
for one month, but my husband was allergic to him and Oscar hid under the bed
from his friendly advances.  Eros was adopted early this week, and I am very
happy about that.

So here's where I'm dumb.  I really want another cat.  I know that I don't
need another cat.  I know it's probably a bad idea.  I know that Eric, my
husband, is definitely not on board.

I am further dumb because I went ahead and called the shelter asking about a
cat that I *know* lived with Eros for a few weeks.  He's older, was not very
outgoing to the other cats in the condo, and therefore sounded like a good
candidate.  Their notes, however, show him as being in his own cage because he
dislikes other cats.  Well then.

So I go on to ask the question.  "Is there any way to do a trial adoption?  I
know you guys foster some cats ... could I bring a cat home, try him out, and
see if my cat and my husband can tolerate him?"  Amazingly, the answer was,
well, it's not standard protocol, but depending on how long the animal has
been stuck at the shelter .... and then she suggested Kaia, a boy kitty who's
been at the shelter since late september.  A normal, healthy adult cat goes
for $95; Kaia has been reduced to $25.  No one's really looked at him in
months, and they have people spending time with him just to make him feel a
little better.  He's eight years old.  A true foster setup requires house
inspections and such; she suggested a no-pay adoption, with the agreement that
I can return him if it doesn't work out and I can pay if it does.  She thinks
he would do well to have a few days in a house, even in his own room.

I suspect that this is extremely foolish.  I suspect that my husband will
object, vehemently.  I suspect that Oscar won't tolerate Kaia, either.

Haha, I just called to ask about the stated "needs work with housetraining"
business, and she says that someone's actually meeting with him; his first
nibble in months.

But the question still stands.  Should I trial adopt an older kitty who
maybe won't be hot after Oscar's tail, or should I leave well enough
alone?

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

Jo Firey - 30 Dec 2004 21:49 GMT
Given your husbands allergy problems and Oscar's sharing problems, if I were
is your shoes I'd leave well enough alone.  If your husbands allergies got
worse Oscar could be at risk.

Jo
> So, as some of you may know, I have a cat named Oscar.  I had a cat named
> Eros
[quoted text clipped - 49 lines]
> maybe won't be hot after Oscar's tail, or should I leave well enough
> alone?
Monique Y. Mudama - 30 Dec 2004 22:15 GMT
> Given your husbands allergy problems and Oscar's sharing problems, if I were
> is your shoes I'd leave well enough alone.  If your husbands allergies got
> worse Oscar could be at risk.

Oscar is *not* going anywhere.

Could repeated exposure make Eric more allergic than he already is?

To be clear, he has *no* health problems triggered by Oscar.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

Christine Burel - 31 Dec 2004 02:11 GMT
I tend to agree here; what you could do is work with socializing the kitties
at the shelter that are up for adoption (unless I've goofed and you're doing
this already).  It would do a lot of good for the kitties who are stuck in
cages waiting for adoption; I do this at my local animal humane association.
It might satisfy your neediness for kitties and yet spare you any conflicts
re Oscar and hubby at home.
hth,
Christine
> Given your husbands allergy problems and Oscar's sharing problems, if I were
> is your shoes I'd leave well enough alone.  If your husbands allergies got
[quoted text clipped - 54 lines]
> > maybe won't be hot after Oscar's tail, or should I leave well enough
> > alone?
jmcquown - 30 Dec 2004 22:05 GMT
> So, as some of you may know, I have a cat named Oscar.  I had a cat
> named Eros for one month, but my husband was allergic to him and
> Oscar hid under the bed from his friendly advances.

I'm not clear on why your husband was allergic to Eros but not to Oscar?
Was it pet dander?  Fur length?

 Eros was adopted
> early this week, and I am very happy about that.

I'm happy too!  I got teary every time I read about you visiting Eros at the
shelter and having to leave again.

> So here's where I'm dumb.  I really want another cat.  I know that I
> don't need another cat.  I know it's probably a bad idea.  I know
> that Eric, my husband, is definitely not on board.

That's probably a major consideration.

> I am further dumb because I went ahead and called the shelter asking
> about a cat that I *know* lived with Eros for a few weeks.  He's
> older, was not very outgoing to the other cats in the condo, and
> therefore sounded like a good candidate.  Their notes, however, show
> him as being in his own cage because he dislikes other cats.

Then how would he get along with Oscar?

> So I go on to ask the question.  "Is there any way to do a trial
> adoption?  I know you guys foster some cats ... could I bring a cat
[quoted text clipped - 10 lines]
> can pay if it does.  She thinks he would do well to have a few days
> in a house, even in his own room.

Might be a good idea.  Does Kaia have any health problems?

> I suspect that this is extremely foolish.  I suspect that my husband
> will object, vehemently.  I suspect that Oscar won't tolerate Kaia,
> either.

Persia does not like other cats.  I'd absolutely love to have another cat
but I won't disrupt her life by introducing one.  She chose *me* and I
suspect it's because there aren't other cats here ;)  She totally ignores my
birds; they are beneath her.

> Haha, I just called to ask about the stated "needs work with
> housetraining" business, and she says that someone's actually meeting
> with him; his first nibble in months.

Awwww!  Maybe that's a sign.  And if he needs "work" maybe he needs no
stress or a bladder check-up.

> But the question still stands.  Should I trial adopt an older kitty
> who
> maybe won't be hot after Oscar's tail, or should I leave well enough
> alone?

Sadly, that is only a question you can answer given your DH and other
circumstances.  Whatever you do, know you'll be supported here.

Jill
Monique Y. Mudama - 30 Dec 2004 22:26 GMT
>> So, as some of you may know, I have a cat named Oscar.  I had a cat named
>> Eros for one month, but my husband was allergic to him and Oscar hid under
>> the bed from his friendly advances.
>
> I'm not clear on why your husband was allergic to Eros but not to Oscar?
> Was it pet dander?  Fur length?

Sadly, I don't know, either.  It's not fur length, at least not in the
traditional sense -- Oscar is a longhair, no problem.  Eros is a shorthair,
big problem.

I honestly think that Eros groomed himself more than Oscar, which could be it.
I've also done some web-research and apparently both males and darker cats are
more likely to be allergenic than females and light-colored cats.  Eros is a
black male ...

>> Eros was adopted early this week, and I am very happy about that.
>
> I'm happy too!  I got teary every time I read about you visiting Eros
> at the shelter and having to leave again.

Doh, sorry about that!  I didn't post every time I visited, because I
figured you guys were tired of hearing about it =)

>> So here's where I'm dumb.  I really want another cat.  I know that I
>> don't need another cat.  I know it's probably a bad idea.  I know
>> that Eric, my husband, is definitely not on board.
>>
> That's probably a major consideration.

I wouldn't do anything like this without his acceptance.  I'd prefer his
approval, of course.  I've brought up this "plan" to him in general terms, but
it didn't really come to a head because it was theoretical; we didn't even
know if the shelter would consider a "trial" adoption.

>> I am further dumb because I went ahead and called the shelter asking
>> about a cat that I *know* lived with Eros for a few weeks.  He's
[quoted text clipped - 3 lines]
>
> Then how would he get along with Oscar?

Ah, sorry, I wasn't clear.  Before the phone call, I didn't know he didn't
like other cats; of course, once I found out, both I and the shelter person
agreed that he would be a poor candidate for this kind of trial.

[snip bit about Kaia]

> Might be a good idea.  Does Kaia have any health problems?

I never got that far, because when the shelter person went to get his
paperwork, we found out that he was being visited =)  I hope he gets adopted.
The number of cats at the shelter seems to have shrunk drastically since last
week.  Tis the season for good deeds and open hearts, I guess.

> Persia does not like other cats.  I'd absolutely love to have another
> cat but I won't disrupt her life by introducing one.  She chose *me*
> and I suspect it's because there aren't other cats here ;)  She
> totally ignores my birds; they are beneath her.

But I keep hearing stories about cats working it out and eventually becoming
friends ... and I know that I didn't do a good job of introducing Oscar and
Eros.  So maybe I'm in la-la land, but I think it could possibly go much
better than it did.

>> Haha, I just called to ask about the stated "needs work with
>> housetraining" business, and she says that someone's actually meeting
>> with him; his first nibble in months.
>>
> Awwww!  Maybe that's a sign.  And if he needs "work" maybe he needs no
> stress or a bladder check-up.

But a sign in which direction? =P

This shelter is very responsible; health issues are the first thing their vets
investigate when there are potty problems.  So it's probably behavioral.

>> But the question still stands.  Should I trial adopt an older kitty
>> who maybe won't be hot after Oscar's tail, or should I leave well
>> enough alone?
>
> Sadly, that is only a question you can answer given your DH and other
> circumstances.  Whatever you do, know you'll be supported here.

Thank you.  I suspect I know the right answer, but just don't want to hear it.
On the other hand, I could make a shelter  kitty's life a lot more bearable by
letting him/her have a larger space for a few days, and a happier cat could be
a cat who gets adopted quickly ...

There's a box that Oscar never used to sit in, though she does have favorite
boxes.  Eros loved the box, though.  Now that Eros has been gone a while,
Oscar has started sitting in it.  I wonder if that's some sort of process ...?
Also, I've come home smelling of strange cats a number of times, which I never
did in the past.  I wonder if that will help her at all ...

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

Yowie - 30 Dec 2004 23:13 GMT
> > So, as some of you may know, I have a cat named Oscar.  I had a cat
> > named Eros for one month, but my husband was allergic to him and
> > Oscar hid under the bed from his friendly advances.
>
> I'm not clear on why your husband was allergic to Eros but not to Oscar?
> Was it pet dander?  Fur length?

Allergies are weird things, and although I'm technically allergic to cats, I
find some cats really set me off, some cats make me vaguely sniffly, and
some cats don't bother me at all.

Shmogg is a vaguely sniffly cat. Unfortunately, it looks like I'm more
allergic to IBKFergus (although perhaps it will settle down later). And yet
Romeo and Juliet didn't bother me at all, I could inhale deep into the
gorgeous furriness and have absolutely no reaction. I have yet to notice any
trend with different breeds or with furriness, just that each cat is its own
individual and obviously produce their own individual level of whatever it
is I'm allergic to.

As to the advice, I'd go with the "fostering" option if you have to. If it
doesn't work out, at least you've helped with the socialisation of the cat.
If it does.... well, wonderful!

Yowie
Monique Y. Mudama - 30 Dec 2004 23:29 GMT
> Allergies are weird things, and although I'm technically allergic to cats, I
> find some cats really set me off, some cats make me vaguely sniffly, and
> some cats don't bother me at all.

[snip]

> Unfortunately, it looks like I'm more
> allergic to IBKFergus (although perhaps it will settle down later).

I know that IBKFergus is black, which is (probably) one strike.  Have you
figured out if he's really a boy?  That could also be an issue, although I'd
imagine as young as he (?) is he shouldn't be producing massive amounts of
hormone-induced allergens.

Out of curiosity, are any of your other kitties all-black?

> As to the advice, I'd go with the "fostering" option if you have to. If it
> doesn't work out, at least you've helped with the socialisation of the cat.
> If it does.... well, wonderful!

I am definitely not going to commit myself to a full-blown adoption.  If I do
this, it will have to be in a pseudo-foster situation, with the very clear
understanding that I may not be able to keep the cat.  This would all be in
writing on the shelter documents.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

Yowie - 31 Dec 2004 02:32 GMT
> > Allergies are weird things, and although I'm technically allergic to cats, I
> > find some cats really set me off, some cats make me vaguely sniffly, and
[quoted text clipped - 9 lines]
> imagine as young as he (?) is he shouldn't be producing massive amounts of
> hormone-induced allergens.

I *think* he's a boy, but strangely :-) he doesn't like me fiddling about
back there.

> Out of curiosity, are any of your other kitties all-black?

No, Shmogg is a grey "ticked" tabby. IBKFergus isn't *quite* all black,
there's a sprinkle of white hairs on his ears, his front paws, and a more
conentrated sprinkling on a small patch on his belly - but it isn't a
*white* patch, so much as "salt and pepper". And I can see tabby stripes on
his head. I'm wondering whether he is actually black, or just a very dark
brown.

Yowie
Howard Berkowitz - 31 Dec 2004 03:01 GMT
Was I just amazingly lucky?

When I adopted Mr. Clark (about 3 years), Ding (4 months) and Rhonda (3
months), there was never any conflict. Rhonda was first to explore, then
Mr. Clark, while Ding was rather shy.  But as they came out, Mr. Clark
immediately decided that he was responsible for the kittens (and
hoomin), and the two kittens would obviously play-fight -- but there was
hardly ever a hiss, growl, etc.

They remain very affectionate toward one another and toward me -- they
seem to have rituals for who takes which space, eat happily from the
same bowl, etc.  While Ding is more the shy one, the other two are
always eager to meet new humans. Mr. Clark will tend to go and reassure
them, where Rhonda wants to be the *star*.

In contrast, when Clifford (RB), as a kitten, was introduced to
Chatterley (RB), perhaps 1.5 years old, he greeted her with a hiss and
they fought for the rest of her life.
KellyH - 30 Dec 2004 22:26 GMT
> So, as some of you may know, I have a cat named Oscar.  I had a cat named
> Eros
[quoted text clipped - 7 lines]
> need another cat.  I know it's probably a bad idea.  I know that Eric, my
> husband, is definitely not on board.

This is a major consideration.  ALL people in the household have to be on
board with adopting an animal.  Also, given your husband's allergy
situation, I wouldn't push it.  Same with Oscar not being keen on other
cats.

> So I go on to ask the question.  "Is there any way to do a trial adoption?
> I
[quoted text clipped - 16 lines]
> thinks
> he would do well to have a few days in a house, even in his own room.

> But the question still stands.  Should I trial adopt an older kitty who
> maybe won't be hot after Oscar's tail, or should I leave well enough
> alone?

What about just doing fostering and not all out adopting a cat?  If you have
a spare room to do this, this should take care of Oscar's issues and your
husband's.  You could get this kitty out of the shelter for a while and work
with him.

I'm not trying to be harsh, I'm speaking here as a Cat Adoption Counselor at
a shelter.  If you had turned Eros into my shelter and then asked about
adopting another cat, I would say no, given the reasons you turned in Eros.

Signature

-Kelly
kelly at farringtons dot net
"Wake up, and smell the cat food" -TMBG

Monique Y. Mudama - 30 Dec 2004 22:52 GMT
>> So here's where I'm dumb.  I really want another cat.  I know that I don't
>> need another cat.  I know it's probably a bad idea.  I know that Eric, my
[quoted text clipped - 4 lines]
> situation, I wouldn't push it.  Same with Oscar not being keen on other
> cats.

Well, to be clear, Eric hasn't flat-out said "No."  He has strong
reservations, and I can't blame him.  I would never make a major decision,
like adopting a cat, without his acceptance.  I figure you have to plan on
being able to care for a cat for at least 15 years, if you're going to adopt
one.  Doing so without my life-mate's approval ... that doesn't compute.

>> But the question still stands.  Should I trial adopt an older kitty who
>> maybe won't be hot after Oscar's tail, or should I leave well enough alone?
[quoted text clipped - 3 lines]
> husband's.  You could get this kitty out of the shelter for a while and work
> with him.

I'm not sure my husband would be up for having a constant parade of animals
coming through the house.  I'm pretty sure I don't have the time to handle
your typical foster animals; they're usually in foster care because they are
too young, injured or ill to deal with shelter life, and that implies a lot of
time.  On your average work day, it would not be unusual for me to be out of
the house for ten hours at a stretch.  So a relatively healthy cat who needs a
mental break, sure.  A constant need for a great deal of time and care?  I wish
I could do that, but I can't.

Of course, the idea was kind of both.  A non-standard foster situation, in
that the possibility exists of adoption.  The only reason for the adoption
paperwork is that they are legally required to do home inspections and a lot
of other stuff in order to accept someone as a foster family.  As it wouldn't
be a typical foster situation, this would not be needed.  But the cat in
question *would* get an opportunity for some respite from the shelter, which
is what you're talking about.

In fact, when I originally adopted Eros, it was with the understanding that I
could bring him back to his previous owner if it didn't work out.
Unfortunately, as soon as he was out of her home, she didn't have much
interest in addressing that part of the deal.  I think this shelter will be
better at honoring its word.

> I'm not trying to be harsh, I'm speaking here as a Cat Adoption Counselor at
> a shelter.  If you had turned Eros into my shelter and then asked about
> adopting another cat, I would say no, given the reasons you turned in Eros.

If I didn't want opinions, even harsh ones, I wouldn't have asked.  I
understand your point of view perfectly; if I knew that trying adoption were
the right course of action, I wouldn't have posted this question.

The shelter director told me, when I brought Eros, that a lot of cats will get
along with some cats, but not others.  Oscar never had exposure to other cats
till I brought Eros home, so I don't have a lot of data there.  And I know
that she can tolerate dogs, even pesky ones, so it's not like she's
*completely* anti-other-pets.  Unfortunately, dogs require more care than I
feel I can commit to right now.  It's not the amount of time; it's the
increments.  I'm just out of the house for too long at a time.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

MaryL - 31 Dec 2004 02:55 GMT
<snip>
> I'm not sure my husband would be up for having a constant parade of
> animals
[quoted text clipped - 10 lines]
> wish
> I could do that, but I can't.

With that last paragraph in mind, what would you do if you adopted a
seemingly healthy cat that later developed severe health problems?  Just
like children, it does happen -- and all of us who adopt pets should be
prepared to deal with such a situation.  We simply cannot be sure that the
cat we adopt will remain "healthy."  Many of them will, indeed, require "a
constant need for a great deal of time and care."  All of these factors need
to be carefully considered before undertaking an adoption.

MaryL
Monique Y. Mudama - 31 Dec 2004 03:19 GMT
><snip>
>> I'm not sure my husband would be up for having a constant parade of animals
[quoted text clipped - 13 lines]
> constant need for a great deal of time and care."  All of these factors need
> to be carefully considered before undertaking an adoption.

Of course you are right.  It's certainly something to be considered, just as
it is possible that Eric could develop severe health problems and need care,
or that I could develop severe health problems and need Eric to care for me
*and* Oscar.

If one of my loved ones needs better care, I will have to adjust my life
accordingly.  That's reality.  And, at least currently, Eric works close to
home and could cover some of the care duties if need be.  But I see a
distinction here.  It's one thing to accept the risk that a loved one may need
extensive care; it's another to volunteer to provide that extensive care on a
routine basis for a series of foster babies.  They are equally deserving, but
I have to draw the line somewhere.  And while I could ask Eric to help me care
for Oscar if she becomes ill, it's another matter for me to volunteer him as a
foster caretaker.

Eric is compassionate with animals, but it's not clear to me that he has the
visceral reaction that I do.  I know that he has consciously chosen to reduce
his own stress level because the formula of Eric plus stress tends to equal
health problems, so he has learned to react in a more stoic manner.  I, on the
other hand, am one of those people who feels the highs are worth the lows, and
I seem to live this philosophy pretty regularly.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

Sherry - 04 Jan 2005 05:38 GMT
>Of course, the idea was kind of both.  A non-standard foster situation, in
>that the possibility exists of adoption.  The only reason for the adoption
[quoted text clipped - 3 lines]
>question *would* get an opportunity for some respite from the shelter, which
>is what you're talking about.

Monique, I see your point about giving the cat a break from the shelter and a
trial run. I think the usual objection is that if other cats didn't work out,
the new one isn't likely to. Also, if the cat is in your home, and not being
shown to prospective adoptors, he might miss out on chances to get adopted
while he's there.
Our cats in foster care would never get adopted if we didn't have adopt-a-thons
in public places where people can see them. People aren't very willing to go
inside a private home to look at a cat. That's just my experience.
I tried fostering a dog sort of like what you're talking about. Not one person
even came to look at him, and I ended up adopting him.
Sherry
Monique Y. Mudama - 07 Jan 2005 00:23 GMT
Sorry for the late response ...

>>Of course, the idea was kind of both.  A non-standard foster situation, in
>>that the possibility exists of adoption.  The only reason for the adoption
[quoted text clipped - 9 lines]
> shown to prospective adoptors, he might miss out on chances to get adopted
> while he's there.

Yup.  That's true.  The shelter would not let me take home "desirable" cats
like this.  The idea was to try an older cat who wasn't getting any nibbles at
the shelter, anyway.  A break and some human-time might get the cat to eat
better, be more alert and generally start looking more adoptable.

I really botched the job when introducing Eros to our house.  I kind of
plopped him on the floor and hoped they'd work it out.  Well, Eros made
himself right at home after a day of hiding in the basement; the problem, as
we know, was Oscar.  I think it is possible, although not certain, that if I
actually followed the commonly-discussed cat introduction rules, Oscar might
be a lot more receptive.  I felt so bad for Eros having to leave his previous
home that I wasn't willing to do the right thing for the first few weeks, and
we all paid for it.

Honestly, though, I think Eric had the right idea in waiting a month before
making any decisions.  I'm already starting to think, gee, Oscar's so happy
now, do I really want to rock the boat?  In an ideal world, though, I'd love
to have more than one furry pet, and it would be especially great if the other
pet provided Oscar with some companionship and also if we could home a cat
with few other prospects.  It seemed to me that Oscar mourned Puma's loss; if
she could get along with a sedate older dog, why not a sedate older cat?   I
know it's a different matter, but it seems possible.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

BC - 31 Dec 2004 12:14 GMT
>>So, as some of you may know, I have a cat named Oscar.  I had a cat named
>>Eros
[quoted text clipped - 46 lines]
> a shelter.  If you had turned Eros into my shelter and then asked about
> adopting another cat, I would say no, given the reasons you turned in Eros.

I hope you haven't come to this conclusion because her husband was
allergic to one cat.  They already have one cat which causes no problem
at all so there is no reason why they couldn't rehome another cat, but
more time would need to be spent with the husband and the cat to
discover if they were compatible first.

As for the cats not getting on, they only had the previous one for a
month, that is often not long enough for a cat to get used to another
cat, especially as Oscar was used to being alone for so long.  Maybe an
older cat(like the one Monique has her eye on) would make a better
quieter friend for Oscar.(Remembering that rehoming a cat with another
is always a risk.)

Yes it would take more time and possibly paperwork, but surely rehoming
a cat to a loving home is the most important thing. The idea of
fostering it first is a brilliant idea, if it doesn't work out at least
it will be happier in a home environment and maybe have more chance of
finding another home after.

Signature

Badger Badger Badger

jmcquown - 31 Dec 2004 15:01 GMT
>>> So, as some of you may know, I have a cat named Oscar.  I had a cat
>>> named Eros
[quoted text clipped - 48 lines]
> more time would need to be spent with the husband and the cat to
> discover if they were compatible first.

And this leads me to - why not take husband to the shelter to spend time
with and play with Kaia and see if he has allergic reactions?  If so, then
you know not to get the poor kitties hopes up but the kitty will have had
play time and undoubtedly feel better for it.

I can't believe I didn't think of this sooner when reading through this
thread!

Jill
Monique Y. Mudama - 31 Dec 2004 18:01 GMT
> And this leads me to - why not take husband to the shelter to spend time
> with and play with Kaia and see if he has allergic reactions?  If so, then
[quoted text clipped - 3 lines]
> I can't believe I didn't think of this sooner when reading through this
> thread!

My two thoughts here are:

1) I don't know how much time it would take to trigger the allergy

2) With 40-60 cats in the cat area, and a meeting room used by everyone, there
will be so much cat "stuff" in the air that I'd be surprised if he *didn't*
get an allergic reaction.

Still, something to consider.  As I've said, he's asked me to wait a month and
see if my feelings are still strong.  The rational part of me actually agrees
that this is a smart way to try to separate "guilt about giving up Eros" from
"wanting another cat."

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

Christina Websell - 30 Dec 2004 22:31 GMT
> So, as some of you may know, I have a cat named Oscar.  I had a cat named
> Eros
[quoted text clipped - 49 lines]
> maybe won't be hot after Oscar's tail, or should I leave well enough
> alone?

You had to let Eros go because your DH was allergic to him.  I think I am
right in saying this caused you quite a bit of emotional pain.
So why do you think Kaia won't cause the same sort of allergy?
To adopt a middle aged cat and let him think he has a foreverhome when he
might not have could be a bad idea for him.
I'd settle for just Oscar if I were you.  Just my opinion though, others may
differ.
Might be a good idea for you to stay away from the shelter and maybe just
send a donation as you can afford it ;-)
If I went to the local dog shelter I know I'd come home with at least two.
This isn't sensible, so I stay away and support them with a tiny donation
when I can.   If I saw them, I'd be unable to resist.

Tweed
Monique Y. Mudama - 30 Dec 2004 22:57 GMT
> You had to let Eros go because your DH was allergic to him.  I think I am
> right in saying this caused you quite a bit of emotional pain.  So why do
> you think Kaia won't cause the same sort of allergy?  

Just the fact that Eric's not allergic to Oscar at all, and that Kaia isn't
dark-furred, which I believe to be the issue.  A female would be even better,
from an allergen standpoint.

> To adopt a middle aged cat and let him think he has a foreverhome when
> he might not have could be a bad idea for him.  

But the shelter rep actually agreed with me that a few days in his own room in
a house would be *good* for him, even if he came right back ...  *puzzled*
I'm not talking about cats with good adoption prospects here.  I'm talking
about cats that have been in "solitary confinement" for several months, who
are already on "handling" routines so that they get used to contact with
people.

They would not consider this sort of arrangement for their "good prospect"
animals.  Only for their hard cases, and only with permission from the shelter
director herself.

> I'd settle for just Oscar if I were you.  Just my opinion though,
> others may differ.  

Sounds like most agree with you, and that's certainly something I need to
weigh, as I am not a cat expert.

> Might be a good idea for you to stay away from the
> shelter and maybe just send a donation as you can afford it ;-)

I've already set up a monthly deduction from my credit card.  Every month's
contribution is small, but I figure it will add up.

> If I went to the local dog shelter I know I'd come home with at least
> two.  This isn't sensible, so I stay away and support them with a tiny
> donation when I can.   If I saw them, I'd be unable to resist.

I know the feeling.  I would like to volunteer as a dog-walker, but I have to
be sure I won't come home with one or five dogs.  For right now, I'm too
vulnerable, but I hope to work up to it this year.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

KellyH - 30 Dec 2004 23:08 GMT
> Just the fact that Eric's not allergic to Oscar at all, and that Kaia
> isn't
> dark-furred, which I believe to be the issue.  A female would be even
> better,
> from an allergen standpoint.

I have *never* heard of a female vs. male or light vs. dark cat being better
or worse as far as allergies go.  Anyone else heard of this, or have a
reference?

Signature

-Kelly
kelly at farringtons dot net
"Wake up, and smell the cat food" -TMBG

Monique Y. Mudama - 30 Dec 2004 23:24 GMT
>> Just the fact that Eric's not allergic to Oscar at all, and that Kaia isn't
>> dark-furred, which I believe to be the issue.  A female would be even
[quoted text clipped - 3 lines]
> or worse as far as allergies go.  Anyone else heard of this, or have a
> reference?

Here you go.  It looks like color is more of an issue than gender; at least,
as far as gender goes, I can only find reference to the fact that neutered
males are less allergenic than "whole" males.

I will grant you that it looks like the articles on color may all stem from
the same survey; it's not clear to me that there's been independent
verification.

I found these by searching google for "cat allergies color" and "cat allergies
male".

Color:

http://www.infopet.co.uk/pages/5021c.htm

[quote]
Dark-haired cats more likely to cause allergies in humans

source: Roger Dobson
Independent May 1 2000 p1

Allergy specialists have discovered that owners of dark-haired
cats have a six-fold possibility of suffering an allergy compared
to owners of light-coloured cats. Owners with and without
allergies were questioned on whether their cats were permitted to
go into their bedrooms, and on the colour and gender of their
cats. Gender and being allowed into the bedroom do not appear to
be linked to allergies, whereas there does appear to be a link
between colour and allergies, perhaps due to the composition or
thickness of cat hairs.
CA,HH
[/quote]

http://www.drgreene.com/21_305.html

[quote]
At the year 2000 annual meeting of the American College of Asthma, Allergy,
and Immunology in Seattle an interesting cat-hair study was presented. People
with dark-colored cats were 2 to 4 times more likely to experience moderate or
severe allergic symptoms than people with no cats or with light-colored cats.
There was no statistical difference in these symptoms between those with
light-hair cats and those with no cats! I would guess that these results are a
reflection of the concentration of cat antigens in the different hair colors:
dyeing your cat.s hair won't help!

[/quote]

http://www.prevention.com/article/0,5778,s1-1-51-288-756-1,00.html

[quote]

Cats with dark coats may provoke more sneezing, congestion, and itchier eyes
and throats than lighter-hued felines (The Jour. of Allergy and Clinical
Immunology, Jan 2000).

Researchers at Long Island College Hospital in Brooklyn studied 60 cat
owners: 29 with moderate allergy symptoms, 14 with mild symptoms, and 17 who
had no symptoms at all. Those with moderate symptoms were more likely to own
dark-colored cats than those with mild or no symptoms. In fact, the odds of
having moderate symptoms were six times higher with a dark kitty.
[snip]       
[/quote]

Gender:

http://www.felinerescue.net/allergic_to_cats.htm

[quote]

Researchers studying ways to reduce cat allergenicity found some cats
consistently shed lower levels of allergen. Unfortunately, there's no
practical way to identify these "hypoallergenic" cats in advance. But an even
more important allergy predictor is hormones. It turns out male cats shed
substantially greater amounts of allergen than females. A neutered male, on
the other hand, sheds significantly less.

[/quote]

http://www.allergyescape.com/cat-allergy.html

[quote]

If you have a male cat that is not neutered, consider getting him neutered.
This reduces the amount of allergen.

[/quote]

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

KellyH - 30 Dec 2004 23:26 GMT
Very interesting.  I wonder how true it is?  I'll have to go around sniffing
my cats and see which ones make me sneeze more. :-P

Signature

-Kelly
kelly at farringtons dot net
"Wake up, and smell the cat food" -TMBG

>>> Just the fact that Eric's not allergic to Oscar at all, and that Kaia
>>> isn't
[quoted text clipped - 108 lines]
>
> [/quote]
Monique Y. Mudama - 30 Dec 2004 23:44 GMT
> Very interesting.  I wonder how true it is?  I'll have to go around sniffing
> my cats and see which ones make me sneeze more. :-P

I think I may have a better understanding of Eric's problem, too.  He only
last night explained to me that Eros would sleep on Eric's head all night.  I
didn't know because Eric and I were "spooned" and Eros slept between our
heads, apparently, batting Eric with his tail all night.  Eric would pick him
up and deposit him elsewhere, but you know how cats are once they've found a
button to push.

Amazingly, I never woke for any of this.

I'm sure that even a minor allergy will flare up quite a bit if the
culprit feels the need to sleep practically inside the sufferer's nose.
Oscar doesn't do this; I trained her out of it as a kitten.  Sometimes I
regret it, but mostly I am glad that I can usually get a full night's
sleep.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

Karen Chuplis - 31 Dec 2004 00:59 GMT
>>> Just the fact that Eric's not allergic to Oscar at all, and that Kaia isn't
>>> dark-furred, which I believe to be the issue.  A female would be even
[quoted text clipped - 7 lines]
> as far as gender goes, I can only find reference to the fact that neutered
> males are less allergenic than "whole" males.

Hmmm. I wonder about that. My mother has two males: a short haired silky
white and grey whole male and a very thick long haired orange and white cat.
When I pet and brush the thick haired orange male, my eyes get itchy but the
other does not bother me. Pearl who has dense hair can make me a bit itchy
but Grant and Sugar with fine silky longish hair do not. They are of course
all black.
Karen Chuplis - 31 Dec 2004 00:52 GMT
>> Just the fact that Eric's not allergic to Oscar at all, and that Kaia
>> isn't
[quoted text clipped - 5 lines]
> or worse as far as allergies go.  Anyone else heard of this, or have a
> reference?

I often wonder about hair texture. Most cats do not bother me at all, but
some can make my eyes itch. Cats with a rougher or thicker texture hair make
my eyes itch if I pet them a while. I wonder if certain hair texture hangs
on to the saliva more.
Monique Y. Mudama - 31 Dec 2004 01:03 GMT
> I often wonder about hair texture. Most cats do not bother me at all, but
> some can make my eyes itch. Cats with a rougher or thicker texture hair make
> my eyes itch if I pet them a while. I wonder if certain hair texture hangs
> on to the saliva more.

The texture thing seems pertinent to me.  I've had the same experience with
"rough" fur texture.  I wonder if you're right.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

MaryL - 31 Dec 2004 02:57 GMT
>>> Just the fact that Eric's not allergic to Oscar at all, and that Kaia
>>> isn't
[quoted text clipped - 12 lines]
> my eyes itch if I pet them a while. I wonder if certain hair texture hangs
> on to the saliva more.

Texture "might" play a role (guessing here, I don't really *know*), but I
can't possibly imagine how color would be a factor.

MaryL
Monique Y. Mudama - 31 Dec 2004 03:09 GMT
> "Karen Chuplis" <kchuplis@alltel.net> wrote in message
>>
[quoted text clipped - 5 lines]
> Texture "might" play a role (guessing here, I don't really *know*), but I
> can't possibly imagine how color would be a factor.

Well, not directly, obviously, but it could be a matter of commonly paired
traits.  Perhaps black cats commonly have more allergenic dander, just like
calicos are commonly female and human color-blindness is more commonly found
in males.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

BC - 31 Dec 2004 11:45 GMT
>>"Karen Chuplis" <kchuplis@alltel.net> wrote in message
>>
[quoted text clipped - 10 lines]
> calicos are commonly female and human color-blindness is more commonly found
> in males.

I know quite a few people who get very sneezy round some
kittens(including me) presumably because of the texture of the fur and
the rate at which they lose it.  My cousin has a grey/white female cat
which causes her no problem but the second she enters by house with my
pure white, 5 month old short haired male moggy,currently unneutered(but
not for long!) she is an absolute mess, eyes and nose running and
wheezing, which continues for a couple of hours after leaving, that does
not happen with any of her other friends cats  A friends son has also
found he is allergic to my cat, but not to any others.  I have only had
a similar reaction once to a pair of long haired kittens, but never to
any other cats or kittens regardless of fur length, age, colour or sex.

The only thing I have concluded is that my cat sheds alot of hair,  I
have a blue velvet duvet cover which within a couple of hours is covered
in white hairs as though it hasn't been washed in months.

So if you take on another cat make sure your husband spends alot of time
with it to see if it causes a reaction, some cats will, some wont and
there is only one way to find out-Good luck!

Signature

Badger Badger Badger

Sherry - 04 Jan 2005 05:41 GMT
>I often wonder about hair texture. Most cats do not bother me at all, but
>some can make my eyes itch. Cats with a rougher or thicker texture hair make
>my eyes itch if I pet them a while. I wonder if certain hair texture hangs
>on to the saliva more.

I think that's true, Karen. Frank has extra-long, extra-fine, extra-thick
angora-type hair. He's light colored. He is the only one that I ever react to.
Sometimes he makes my eyes itch and run.
sherry
Adrian - 01 Jan 2005 11:48 GMT
>> Just the fact that Eric's not allergic to Oscar at all, and that Kaia
>> isn't
[quoted text clipped - 5 lines]
> better or worse as far as allergies go.  Anyone else heard of this,
> or have a reference?

The only difference I have noticed is, I am more allergic to orientals.
One time I had a siamese on my lap for half an hour, my eyelids swelled
so much I could hardley see. The cat was perfectly happy though, so I
could move him. :-)
Signature

Adrian (Owned by Snoopy & Bagheera)
A house is not a home, without a cat.

MaryL - 30 Dec 2004 22:42 GMT
> So, as some of you may know, I have a cat named Oscar.  I had a cat named
> Eros
[quoted text clipped - 7 lines]
> need another cat.  I know it's probably a bad idea.  I know that Eric, my
> husband, is definitely not on board.

<snip>

> But the question still stands.  Should I trial adopt an older kitty who
> maybe won't be hot after Oscar's tail, or should I leave well enough
> alone?

In my opinion, this would be inconsiderate.  You already gave up one cat
because of your husband's allergies and your other cat's objections.  Your
husband's allergies will not have improved, and your other cat is likely to
react with just as much antagonism as before.  So, what is the likely
scenario?  In all likelihood, this poor cat will be shuttled back to the
shelter after living for a few weeks (if that) with you.  An adoption should
be a lifelong commitment, and that is not what it would be in this case.
Please don't do it!

MaryL

Duffy at the animal shelter (before adoption):
http://pic10.picturetrail.com/VOL320/476350/1636692/19233823.jpg
The transformation -- Duffy today:
http://pic10.picturetrail.com/VOL320/476350/1916528/41680392.jpg
Duffy examines the Christmas tree:
http://pic10.picturetrail.com/VOL320/476350/1916528/76258004.jpg
Holly on the mantle:
http://pic10.picturetrail.com/VOL320/476350/1916528/34609798.jpg
Holly playing with yarn:
http://pic10.picturetrail.com/VOL320/476350/1916528/53748850.jpg
Holly and Duffy on the cat tree:
http://pic10.picturetrail.com/VOL320/476350/1916528/24118497.jpg
Monique Y. Mudama - 30 Dec 2004 22:57 GMT
> In my opinion, this would be inconsiderate.  You already gave up one cat
> because of your husband's allergies and your other cat's objections.  Your
[quoted text clipped - 4 lines]
> be a lifelong commitment, and that is not what it would be in this case.
> Please don't do it!

I guess I'm still confused.  How is it that "foster homes" are a good thing
for animals, but a "trial adoption" of a pet with poor prospects who's been
stuck a cage for months is a bad idea?  I am not trying to be difficult here;
I'm just trying to understand.  Perhaps I don't understand the distinction
between foster behavior and owner behavior well enough.

My husband's immune system hasn't changed, of course, but I honestly believe
that Eros was exceptionally allergenic.  A post by someone on the h+b
newsgroup makes me think that such cats do exist.  I would not even try for
another black male, that's for sure.  A light female would be best.

However, your points are well-taken and I am definitely thinking hard.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

KellyH - 30 Dec 2004 23:20 GMT
> I guess I'm still confused.  How is it that "foster homes" are a good
> thing
[quoted text clipped - 4 lines]
> I'm just trying to understand.  Perhaps I don't understand the distinction
> between foster behavior and owner behavior well enough.

It's not that foster homes are bad, or trial adoptions either.  Our shelter
does those too, we call it foster-to-adopt.  What people on here are wary of
is that given your situation that this would work out for the cat.
At the shelter I'm with, cats are usually fostered either for medical or
socialization reasons.  Sometimes a volunteer will take home a long-term
resident to get them out of the shelter for a while.  What we usually do
there is bring the cat in on Adoption Days to try to get him adopted, and/or
do showings from the person's house so the cat does not have to return to
the shelter.
Signature

-Kelly
kelly at farringtons dot net
"Wake up, and smell the cat food" -TMBG

Monique Y. Mudama - 31 Dec 2004 00:58 GMT
> It's not that foster homes are bad, or trial adoptions either.  Our shelter
> does those too, we call it foster-to-adopt.  What people on here are wary of
> is that given your situation that this would work out for the cat.  

This makes sense.  Rather than the "throw two cats in a room together and see
what happens" approach, if I did this, I would keep the new cat in a separate
room for a week, first, before any contact would occur.  I'd follow all the
suggestions about wiping both cats' scents on commonly used items, and if all
of that seemed okay, putting Oscar in the room while the other cat roamed.
Only after all of that would I let them see each other.  I would also read up
on cat-introduction techniques and follow suggestions very carefully.

As I see it, this would give the shelter cat at least a week of having a big
room (the guest room) to itself, and the smell of only one cat, rather than a
small cage and the smell of dozens of cats.

Even with all of these precautions, would you still consider this to be a bad
idea?

> At the shelter I'm with, cats are usually fostered either for medical
> or socialization reasons.  Sometimes a volunteer will take home a
> long-term resident to get them out of the shelter for a while.  What
> we usually do there is bring the cat in on Adoption Days to try to get
> him adopted, and/or do showings from the person's house so the cat
> does not have to return to the shelter.

Showing from a house is a great idea.  I noticed that Eros "showed" much
better when I visited him in his condo than when I took him to a meeting
room.  The meeting place had so many interesting smells that he had very
little interest in any human who might be in the room.  The condo was
familiar, so he was much more relaxed, ready to play and cuddle.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

KellyH - 31 Dec 2004 01:53 GMT
> As I see it, this would give the shelter cat at least a week of having a
> big
[quoted text clipped - 5 lines]
> bad
> idea?

No, I don't think it would be a bad idea.  But, it's going to take a lot
longer than a week for both cats to acclimate.

Signature

-Kelly
kelly at farringtons dot net
"Wake up, and smell the cat food" -TMBG

Monique Y. Mudama - 31 Dec 2004 02:00 GMT
>> As I see it, this would give the shelter cat at least a week of having a
>> big room (the guest room) to itself, and the smell of only one cat, rather
[quoted text clipped - 5 lines]
> No, I don't think it would be a bad idea.  But, it's going to take a lot
> longer than a week for both cats to acclimate.

I would agree, but I thought that about a week was typical for one cat to stay
in a designated room before moving forward .. ?

Can you give me other advice, or point me to some web resources you'd
recommend?

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

KellyH - 31 Dec 2004 02:09 GMT
> I would agree, but I thought that about a week was typical for one cat to
> stay
> in a designated room before moving forward .. ?
>
> Can you give me other advice, or point me to some web resources you'd
> recommend?

Sorry I misread.  I thought you meant a week total in your house.  Sometimes
a week in one room is fine, sometimes it can take longer.  All depends on
the cats.

Signature

-Kelly
kelly at farringtons dot net
"Wake up, and smell the cat food" -TMBG

MaryL - 31 Dec 2004 02:17 GMT
>>> As I see it, this would give the shelter cat at least a week of having a
>>> big room (the guest room) to itself, and the smell of only one cat,
[quoted text clipped - 14 lines]
> Can you give me other advice, or point me to some web resources you'd
> recommend?

Some cats will adjust well after a relatively short time, but a week is
*much* too short for many cats -- and you have some evidence that Oscar may
fit in the latter category.  That was also true for me.  My cat, Holly, was
antagonistic toward every other cat; and I thought adoption would be
impossible.  Then I adopted Duffy, but I used a *very* long and slow
introduction process.  In fact, it was a full six weeks before I left them
together for the entire day, including extended periods when I was not home
(extended *during the day,* that is).  If you look at the first "album"
under my signature, you will see a pictorial history of what I did.  My two
are now buddies.  On the other hand, I did not face the additional problem
of allergies that you have described.  Have you talked to your husband's
allergist about that?  Is it possible that he (either physically or
psychologically) can only tolerate one cat?  It is something to consider.

MaryL
(take out the litter to reply)

Photos of Duffy and Holly:      >'o'<
http://tinyurl.com/8y54 (Introducing Duffy to Holly)
http://tinyurl.com/8y56 (Duffy and Holly "settle in")
MaryL - 31 Dec 2004 02:49 GMT
<snip>
> I would agree, but I thought that about a week was typical for one cat to
> stay
> in a designated room before moving forward .. ?
>
> Can you give me other advice, or point me to some web resources you'd
> recommend?

Here are some web sites that discuss methods for introducing cats:
http://www.catcaresociety.org/intro.htm
http://www.ddfl.org/behavior/catintro.htm
http://www.cuhumane.org/topics/catcat.html
http://www.methuen-mspca.org/petcare/htm/catintro.htm
http://operationnoblefoster.org/catsanddog.htm
http://www.catsinternational.org/ (library of articles)

MaryL

Duffy at the animal shelter (before adoption):
http://pic10.picturetrail.com/VOL320/476350/1636692/19233823.jpg
The transformation -- Duffy today:
http://pic10.picturetrail.com/VOL320/476350/1916528/41680392.jpg
Duffy examines the Christmas tree:
http://pic10.picturetrail.com/VOL320/476350/1916528/76258004.jpg
Holly on the mantle:
http://pic10.picturetrail.com/VOL320/476350/1916528/34609798.jpg
Holly playing with yarn:
http://pic10.picturetrail.com/VOL320/476350/1916528/53748850.jpg
Holly and Duffy on the cat tree:
http://pic10.picturetrail.com/VOL320/476350/1916528/24118497.jpg
Sherry - 31 Dec 2004 06:33 GMT
>> It's not that foster homes are bad, or trial adoptions either.  Our shelter
>> does those too, we call it foster-to-adopt.  What people on here are wary
[quoted text clipped - 28 lines]
>little interest in any human who might be in the room.  The condo was
>familiar, so he was much more relaxed, ready to play and cuddle.

Fostering is great, if everybody is for the idea. If Oscar doesn't take to
other cats, I wouldn't push it. The continued stress could end up making him
sick.
I quit fostering because of Yoda. He just go too old and too cranky to put up
with it anymore.
Sherry
Pat - 31 Dec 2004 03:14 GMT
I would suggest asking the shelter if they have a hypoallergenic breed.
Monique Y. Mudama - 31 Dec 2004 03:24 GMT
> I would suggest asking the shelter if they have a hypoallergenic breed.

I've heard that this is mostly a myth?  I mean, even hairless cats groom
themselves and get their saliva all over everything.

The person I spoke to was pretty forthcoming about options, and she didn't
suggest a hypoallergenic cat, so I suspect they have none.  I'm sure they're
fast movers, too.  Of course, there are other shelters in the area, too.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

Monique Y. Mudama - 31 Dec 2004 06:48 GMT
[snip]

> But the question still stands.  Should I trial adopt an older kitty who
> maybe won't be hot after Oscar's tail, or should I leave well enough alone?

Well, I spoke to Eric this evening.  He says that he has reservations, but is
willing to do a trial adoption *if* I am willing to wait for a month and see
if my conviction to get a second cat is still strong.  This seems very
reasonable to me.

He has also said that he does not want to have to do the work of introducing
the two cats.  That will be my problem.  This also seems reasonable to me.

I asked if he objected to me researching cat introductions in the meantime,
and he does not.  He just wants me to be really sure that this is really what
I want before going forward.  Again, seems reasonable to me.  In a month, I
can reevaluate whether it's worth the potential stress and heartache for both
bare and fur people.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

Toni&Nate - 31 Dec 2004 21:43 GMT
What kind of a nut are you?  You just get rid of one cat, and now want
to adopt another if it works out.  Leave well enough alone, and stick
with your husband.
jmcquown - 01 Jan 2005 00:25 GMT
> What kind of a nut are you?

Be nice; we don't call each other names here.

Jill
Monique Y. Mudama - 01 Jan 2005 06:17 GMT
>> What kind of a nut are you?
>
> Be nice; we don't call each other names here.

That individual followed me from the h+b ng, where they had similar
pleasantries to share.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

CatNipped - 01 Jan 2005 16:47 GMT
> >> What kind of a nut are you?
> >
> > Be nice; we don't call each other names here.
>
> That individual followed me from the h+b ng, where they had similar
> pleasantries to share.

Yeah, that's why I quit even lurking at H+B - there was more flaming there
than helpful advice.

Hugs,

CatNipped

> monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*
Monique Y. Mudama - 01 Jan 2005 19:37 GMT
> Yeah, that's why I quit even lurking at H+B - there was more flaming there
> than helpful advice.

I find skimming the topics useful, as a "heads-up" just in case Oscar starts
doing weird things.  But yeah.

Signature

monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted!  Eros has a home now!  *cheer!*

Howard Berkowitz - 01 Jan 2005 22:02 GMT
> > Yeah, that's why I quit even lurking at H+B - there was more flaming
> > there
[quoted text clipped - 3 lines]
> starts
> doing weird things.  But yeah.

Even for human health, I tend to find most USENET groups, except
super-specialized things in specific scientific techniques, rather
useless for finding any detail.  In contrast, I subscribe to assorted
professional mailing lists, moderated and unmoderated, that have very
high content value.

Even things in the "sci.med" hierarchy often become almost unreadable
with irrelevant requests for information, generic flame wars, flame wars
over alternative medicine, etc.  I'd like to find a professional mailing
list on feline veterinary medicine -- I'm sure they exist.
Adrian - 01 Jan 2005 14:52 GMT
> What kind of a nut are you?  You just get rid of one cat, and now want
> to adopt another if it works out.  Leave well enough alone, and stick
> with your husband.

This is not very friendly for only your second post to the group.
Signature

Adrian (Owned by Snoopy & Bagheera)
A house is not a home, without a cat.

John F. Eldredge - 01 Jan 2005 18:14 GMT
>What kind of a nut are you?  You just get rid of one cat, and now
>want to adopt another if it works out.  Leave well enough alone, and
>stick with your husband.

<plonk>

Signature

John F. Eldredge -- john@jfeldredge.com
PGP key available from http://pgp.mit.edu
"Reserve your right to think, for even to think wrongly is better
than not to think at all." -- Hypatia of Alexandria

Christina Websell - 01 Jan 2005 20:45 GMT
> What kind of a nut are you?  You just get rid of one cat, and now want
> to adopt another if it works out.  Leave well enough alone, and stick
> with your husband.

rpca is not the place to insult people.  Please go back to your own group to
do this.

Tweed
 
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