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Cat Forum / Cat Anecdotes / July 2008Off topic and only because I thought it was funny
GOOD QUESTION ! A stranger was seated next to an 8-year old girl on the airplane when the stranger turned to her and said, 'Let's talk, I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger. ' The little girl, who had just opened her book, closed it slowly and said to the stranger, 'What would you like to talk about?' 'Oh, I don't know,' said the stranger 'How about nuclear power? ' and he smiles. 'OK,' she said. 'That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first : A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff - grass . Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?' The stranger, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says, 'Hmmm, I have no idea.' To which the little girl replies, 'Do you really feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know sh.t? ' > GOOD QUESTION ! > [quoted text clipped - 21 lines] > To which the little girl replies, 'Do you really feel qualified to > discuss nuclear power when you don't know sh.t? ' I LOVE IT! Thanks for the morning smile :) Jill > GOOD QUESTION ! > [quoted text clipped - 19 lines] > To which the little girl replies, 'Do you really feel qualified to discuss > nuclear power when you don't know sh.t? ' ROTFLMAO! I'll have to remember that the next time a stranger, seeing me reading a book, tries to strike up an unwanted conversation! Hugs, CatNipped > > GOOD QUESTION ! > > [quoted text clipped - 26 lines] > > CatNipped That drives me up a wall! Years ago I worked with a guy who just didn't get it. I'd be on my lunch break, sitting on the patio outside the office with my nose in a book. He'd sit down and start yakking at me. I'd give non-committal answers (often merely a grunt!) and not even look at him. He never seemed to get the hint. Since I had to work with the guy I couldn't really say "piss off, can't you see I'm trying to enjoy my book?" Short of being rude, what on earth does it take to give some people a clue? Jill >> > GOOD QUESTION ! >> > [quoted text clipped - 38 lines] > > Jill So, you put the book in your lap and look at him and say with a bit of a whimsical look you remind me of the time someone kept talking to me while I was reading a real interesting book when suddenly I grabbed his throat and throttled him into unconsciousness. The funny thing is even though they told me what I did I have no memory of even doing it! Crazy? Isn't it? Then go back to your book. Andy >>> > GOOD QUESTION ! >>> > [quoted text clipped - 49 lines] > > Andy than you get the flight canceled you escorted of the plane to the FBI and you end up on the watch list and have to spend 2 extra hours in security when you take the next flight "Matthew" <iamacatslaveand@proudtoserve.com> wrote in >> So, you put the book in your lap and look at him and say with a bit >> of a whimsical look you remind me of the time someone kept talking to [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > and you end up on the watch list and have to spend 2 extra hours in > security when you take the next flight Yeah, this one is ok for the co-worker at lunch but not recommended on the airplane. Andy > "Matthew" <iamacatslaveand@proudtoserve.com> wrote in > [quoted text clipped - 17 lines] > > Andy I dunno, you could start with "You know, all I want is to settle down, get married for a change, and have lots more kids because my first three don't seem to have worked out to well. You look like a decent bloke....." That should shut them up and leave them cringing in the corner, desperately hoping that you don't strike up more conversation :-) Yowie > I dunno, you could start with "You know, all I want is to settle down, get > married for a change, and have lots more kids because my first three don't > seem to have worked out to well. You look like a decent bloke....." > > That should shut them up and leave them cringing in the corner, desperately > hoping that you don't strike up more conversation :-) That needed a BW! Alas the one person who will try and talk when I am trying to read and can't take the hint is the infamous Vodka Tony and he might just propose! Which as he's well into his 70's with pretty ghastly teeth and admits he can't start the day without a large vodka means not the best offer I'll ever get,,,,okay so the best I got is Dave so I would have to tell Vodka Tony "Close but no cigar" :-) I've found the only way to deal with him is to get up and walk away and sit somewhere else and if he follows me....I just do it again ..after about the third move he wanders off and moans that I don't want to talk to him to someone else...I feel a bit bad because I just know he's old, not very well and lonely but I have tried asking him to leave me in peace and he goes "Okay you want to read then?" and might give it all of a 3 second pause before he starts talking again- I am a tolerant person but even I have my limits Lesley Slave of the Fabulous Furballs On Jul 25, 1:57 pm, "Matthew" <iamacatslave...@proudtoserve.com> wrote: > >>> > GOOD QUESTION ! > [quoted text clipped - 53 lines] > you end up on the watch list and have to spend 2 extra hours in security > when you take the next flight Or someone takes what you said, carries it to HR, and you face a panel of two who have heard you threatened to kill a coworker and you have to tell them why you shouldn't be fired. Heck, even letting a friend vent to you, and *she* says she like to bring in an Uzi, gets turned into YOU said it, and they come within a breath of firing you, without ever speaking to anyone who works *with* you, just around you. Until your former supervisor says, "You can't fire her without any proof, not even those who sit around her were spoken to. She'll sue." Yep, that second paragraph happened to me, in a County government job. The 'standards' for a raise were changed, just for me. I was given a fair rating, and told I would not get a raise because of the "customer service complaint". The rule was three *verified* complaints, not one from a chick who wasn't hired full time, that no one else could even say they had heard me say something like that. Smokie Darling (Annie) > That drives me up a wall! Years ago I worked with a guy who just > didn't get it. I'd be on my lunch break, sitting on the patio [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > > Jill Believe it or not there are fools out there that honestly believe everyone would rather talk to just about anyone than read a book. Its not always bad to be deaf. Jo >> That drives me up a wall! Years ago I worked with a guy who just >> didn't get it. I'd be on my lunch break, sitting on the patio outside [quoted text clipped - 12 lines] > > Jo Once, years ago, I was sitting at my desk at work, eating my lunch and reading a book. I usually sat at the table in the break room, but, on this occasion, was at my desk. One of my co-workers came up and said, "Since you are eating at your desk, that must mean that you weren't really interested in lunch, and wouldn't mind doing something for me instead of eating." I told him that I was, indeed, interested in eating my lunch, and would get back to him when I was through. He looked rather disappointed, but went away and let me eat and read in peace.  SignatureJohn F. Eldredge -- john@jfeldredge.com PGP key available from http://pgp.mit.edu "Reserve your right to think, for even to think wrongly is better than not to think at all." -- Hypatia of Alexandria > > > That drives me up a wall! Years ago I worked with a guy who just > > > didn't get it. I'd be on my lunch break, sitting on the patio [quoted text clipped - 23 lines] > looked rather disappointed, but went away and let me eat and read in > peace. I often ate (and read) at my desk. The reason being, there were TV's in the break room and apparently everyone on break was deaf (no offense to those truly hearing impaired folks here!). So they'd shout over the TV to talk to each other, rather than turn the thing down or off. Drove me up a tree. I'm pretty good at tuning things out when I get absorbed in a book but the noise level in this case was over the top. People did try to interrupt me when I was lunching at my desk, but I'd only let them do it if it was an urgent situation that couldn't wait (I was the most experienced person in the department). Most people respected it was my time, regardless of where I chose to spend it. Jill >>>> That drives me up a wall! Years ago I worked with a guy who just >>>> didn't get it. I'd be on my lunch break, sitting on the patio [quoted text clipped - 37 lines] > it. > Jill At one place I worked it was impossible to have a quiet break so at lunch time I sat in my car. SignatureAdrian (Owned by Snoopy, Bagheera & Shadow) Cats leave pawprints on your heart http://community.webshots.com/user/clowderuk >>>>> That drives me up a wall! Years ago I worked with a guy who just >>>>> didn't get it. I'd be on my lunch break, sitting on the patio [quoted text clipped - 40 lines] > At one place I worked it was impossible to have a quiet break so at > lunch time I sat in my car. I"ve been known to take myself off to the sick bay (a room attached to the women's toilets. Why there's no equivalent in the men's I have no idea) to have a nap on the daybed there. They only annoying thing is when people wake you up to ask if you are OK. Well I would be if you let me be for half an hour.... It was *great* when I was pregnant. Sometimes my boss said to me (when I had literally fallen asleep mid-sentence) "go take a nap". 15 or so minutes of shut-eye and I was fine. Whilst there are many things that annoy me about my boss, I cannot thank him enough for being understanding and compassionate to a pregnant woman, there wouldn't be too many out there that would encourage nap-taking rather than punishing 'falling asleep at work'. Yowie > I"ve been known to take myself off to the sick bay (a room attached to the > women's toilets. Why there's no equivalent in the men's I have no idea) to > have a nap on the daybed there. They only annoying thing is when people wake > you up to ask if you are OK. Well I would be if you let me be for half an > hour.... There was a room in a company I used to work for that had a daybed in it, and sometimes I would take little naps in the afternoon, during the post-lunch crash. I never got caught, although I guess if it wasn't OK to lie down in there, they wouldn't have set it up. But I still felt sort of furtive doing it. > It was *great* when I was pregnant. Sometimes my boss said to me (when I had > literally fallen asleep mid-sentence) "go take a nap". 15 or so minutes of > shut-eye and I was fine. Whilst there are many things that annoy me about my > boss, I cannot thank him enough for being understanding and compassionate to > a pregnant woman, there wouldn't be too many out there that would encourage > nap-taking rather than punishing 'falling asleep at work'. It's so silly. A short nap is a million times healthier than pumping yourself up with caffeine or sugar, yet many places would much prefer you eat junk rather than give your body the little siesta that it really needs. And then they complain about the high cost of health insurance! SignatureJoyce ^..^ (To email me, remove the X's from my user name.) |
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