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Cat Forum / Cat Anecdotes / August 2008I'm Sorry
Next time I'll post child pornography fantasies instead. Sheesh. Maybe I need a break from most of you. Pam S. disgusted by her stupidity > Next time I'll post child pornography fantasies instead. Sheesh. Maybe I > need a break from most of you. > > Pam S. disgusted by her stupidity What's this about, Pam? Is it because of the "no news from the Mouser" thing? My heart goes out to you and your family, what you are potentially facing and I am surprised you feel up to posting at all. I do have some experience with the "c-thing" and yes, it makes you angry. Osama Bin-Laden deserves it, not ordinary people like us who have done nothing wrong. Unfortunately it seems it doesn't work that way. ((more hugs)) Tweed > Next time I'll post child pornography fantasies instead. Sheesh. Maybe I > need a break from most of you. > > Pam S. disgusted by her stupidity Personally, I don't see what all the fuss is about. As a person who appreciates wicked satire it was clear (to me, anyway) that what you posted was a huge dig at AMERICAN attitudes and the psychology of fear the current government dispenses to us on a daily basis. I didn't see it as intending to be offensive to muslims, but definitely intended as a big pointy jab to those stupid citizens of the gold old USA that continue to buy into that sort of crap. No matter. There will always be someone somewhere that will take something the wrong way and find followers to go down the same path, regardless of what the reality is. >> Next time I'll post child pornography fantasies instead. Sheesh. Maybe I >> need a break from most of you. [quoted text clipped - 11 lines] > followers to go down the same path, regardless of what the reality > is. Anyone care to let the uninitiated know what the hell you're all talking about? When someone starts a thread like this out of the blue, with no indication what it refers to, it leaves some of us floundering! > Anyone care to let the uninitiated know what the hell you're all talking > about? When someone starts a thread like this out of the blue, with no > indication what it refers to, it leaves some of us floundering! Divamanque, you are one of my favorite people but I'm tired of explaining stuff and the original wasn't my post anyway. Someone in a better mood can fill you in. I can fill in background music for you though...."Un Bel Di vedremo" preferably by the unique Ms Callas (my fave tragedy tune of all time). You're gonna be here awhile.....LOL. Betcha without any 411 you will be able to figure out who CioCioSan is...... > On Jul 20, 1:46 pm, "EvelynVogtGamble(Divamanque)" > [quoted text clipped - 12 lines] > be able > to figure out who CioCioSan is...... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jTXE36Lr-lc&feature=related > tripsoverc...@msn.com wrote: > >> Next time I'll post child pornography fantasies instead. Sheesh. Maybe I [quoted text clipped - 18 lines] > > - Show quoted text - See thread "Received In My Inbox Today OT, Political, and funny" for a full background. But here's a brief synopsis. Pam posted a joke. Some people thought it was offensive. Some people didn't. Kyla posted a letter. Some people thought it was offensive. Some didn't. Just to prove we're all so open-minded our brains practically fall out every time we post, Matthew posted some jokes about "Indians" and "Mexicans." But Dan said that was okay. He said we can post any joke we want to, so long as it's just "mildly" offensive, and advised the ones who didn't like it "get over it." This is all my personal interpretation of course. YMMV. Sherry On Jul 20, 2:46 pm, "EvelynVogtGamble(Divamanque)" <evgm...@earthlink.net> wrote: > tripsoverc...@msn.com wrote: > > On Jul 19, 3:57 pm, "tanadashoes" <tan...@earthlink.net> wrote: [quoted text clipped - 21 lines] > > - Show quoted text - See thread "Received In My Inbox Today OT, Political, and funny" for a full background. But here's a brief synopsis. Pam posted a joke. Some people thought it was offensive. Some people didn't. Kyla posted a letter. Some people thought it was offensive. Some didn't. Just to prove we're all so open-minded our brains practically fall out every time we post, Matthew posted some jokes about "Indians" and "Mexicans." But Dan said that was okay. He said we can post any joke we want to, so long as it's just "mildly" offensive, and advised the ones who didn't like it "get over it." This is all my personal interpretation of course. YMMV. Yep, that pretty well covers it, Sherry. Tweed I could really murk up the waters and post my response to Pam concerning this email but, won't go there. Best to let sleeping Dogs/cats lay, lie, whatever. > On Jul 20, 2:46 pm, "EvelynVogtGamble(Divamanque)" > <evgm...@earthlink.net> wrote: [quoted text clipped - 42 lines] > > Tweed Thank you Granby. You're right, and again, I do apologize. Love Kyla "Granby" < >I could really murk up the waters and post my response to Pam concerning >this email but, won't go there. Best to let sleeping Dogs/cats lay, lie, [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] >> On Jul 20, 2:46 pm, "EvelynVogtGamble(Divamanque)" >>> wrote: wrote: >>> > On Jul 19, 3:57 pm, "tanadashoes" : >>> >> Next time I'll post child pornography fantasies instead. Sheesh. [quoted text clipped - 39 lines] >> >> Tweed > Next time I'll post child pornography fantasies instead. Sheesh. Maybe I > need a break from most of you. > > Pam S. disgusted by her stupidity Pam I get the reference (it took me a minute, though)....and it IS just plain weird, isn't it?? I know you have a wonderfully irreverant sense of humor, and I also get that you wouldn't ever offend anybody on purpose. I remember when I got spanked but good just for using the word "lifestyle" in blessed ignorance that it might be an offensive word. Hell. I didn't know. Oops. Can I say "hell?" Maybe you offended some people, now you know. Kick yourself around for 2 seconds then forget about it. But keep your sense of humor. That's what keeps us sane. Sherry On Jul 19, 3:57 pm, "tanadashoes" <tan...@earthlink.net> wrote: > Next time I'll post child pornography fantasies instead. Sheesh. Maybe I > need a break from most of you. > > Pam S. disgusted by her stupidity Pam I get the reference (it took me a minute, though)....and it IS just plain weird, isn't it?? I know you have a wonderfully irreverant sense of humor, and I also get that you wouldn't ever offend anybody on purpose. I remember when I got spanked but good just for using the word "lifestyle" in blessed ignorance that it might be an offensive word. Hell. I didn't know. Oops. Can I say "hell?" Maybe you offended some people, now you know. Kick yourself around for 2 seconds then forget about it. But keep your sense of humor. That's what keeps us sane. Sherry =============== I'm sorry. I got an email from a friend to warn me about this and sent one back saying I could handle it. And I did. Then I saw that email from Kyla to Susan about Grandma Shirley's death and lost it. That email was in as poor of taste or more as my stupid joke, but not one person said anything to her about it. Some of the very people who jumped on the politically correct bandwagon probably thought it was marvelous. I'll tell you, if Kyla sends something so disgusting to us when Rob is fighting his last battle, I'll do something violent. Pam S. > On Jul 19, 3:57 pm, "tanadashoes" <tan...@earthlink.net> wrote: >> Next time I'll post child pornography fantasies instead. Sheesh. Maybe I [quoted text clipped - 28 lines] > > Pam S. Pam, I certainly agree with what you have written here. I thought Kyla's message was dreadful but did not respond to that one because she writes so many where her thoughts seem to get confused that I ignored it. My mother died last year at the age of 91, and I would have been horrified if a message like that had been delivered to her. I put your message in a completely different context. You write beautifully, and none of your own stories have the slightest tinge of unpleasantness. They are delightful and should be published. So, I may have overreacted to the joke, but I have seen that same joke circulating on email, and it seems to be picked up by people who want to see all Muslims as terrorists. I was reacting to what I see in that joke and certainly not to you personally. I have grown to appreciate what you and your family have been facing for so long, and I wish you only the best. MaryL Oh dear, what have I done? I certainly meant NO harm when I wrote about Shirley's death. I'm just sitting here in tears knowing I now have everyone in the group hating me and that wasn't my intention at all. Pam, I know Rob has cancer and I am hoping for good results for him, I am wishing nothing but the best for both him and you Pam. I'm crying so hard, I can't think straight. If you all thought it was in bad taste, dreadful, then I guess it was, but that was not my intention at all. I promise. I lost my own Mother last August, and it still hurts. Please forgive me. I'm SO sorry. Kyla --in tears because now I've lost all my friends > Oh dear, what have I done? I certainly meant NO harm when I wrote about > Shirley's death. I'm just sitting here in tears knowing I now have [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > Kyla > --in tears because now I've lost all my friends You haven't lost all your friends, Kyla. I didn't think the letter was so terrible. I probably wouldn't have written such a letter to someone I didn't know, but I could tell you meant well. I'm so sorry about your mother. I lost mine a year ago last October. ((((((((Kyla))))))))) Joy "Joy" > "Kyla =^. .^=`" >> Oh dear, what have I done? I certainly meant NO harm when I wrote about >> Shirley's death. I'm just sitting here in tears knowing I now have [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > > You haven't lost all your friends, Kyla. Thank you for the kind words Joy... > I didn't think the letter was so terrible. I probably wouldn't have > written such a letter to someone I didn't know, but I could tell you meant > well. I did mean well, but as an afterthought, I probably shouldn't have written it. When Jill's Dad passed away, I wrote each of them a separate sympathy letter, her Mom not knowing who I was. > I'm so sorry about your mother. I lost mine a year ago last October. Thank you and I'm so sorry about your Mother too. They are still watching over us. My Dad passed away a year ago last January too. Mothers, Dads, and Grandparents are precious people. And your kind words mean alot to me because of your recent loss of Nanki-Poo > ((((((((Kyla))))))))) (((((((((Joy)))))))))))) > Joy Kyla > Oh dear, what have I done? I certainly meant NO harm when I wrote about > Shirley's death. I'm just sitting here in tears knowing I now have [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > Kyla > --in tears because now I've lost all my friends Kyla, I'm not sure if I can adequately answer your question about what was wrong with your letter because my own messages are often poorly received and receive a negative reaction, but I will try. You certainly are not "hated" by people on the newsgroup, but some of us did have a negative reaction to the letter. My mother died last year at the age of 91, and I immediately thought of her when I saw your message. I believe that you were trying to be kind and to reassure Grandma Shirley that "everything was alright." Susan realized that death was near (and had even said that her Grandma Shirley was "standing near the bridge"), but she also had asked for purrs to help her grandmother on her journey and had said that she was a fighter who surprised her nurses by her strength. Susan said in her message that "she said to me that there was too much that she didn't want to leave." However, your letter could easily be interpreted as telling Grandma Shirley that there was no longer much time left. It is very true that some people *want* to talk about death when the end of life is imminent, but that is a very delicate matter and should not be broached by a complete stranger who has no way of knowing if that type of conversation is what is needed. You did not try to directly contact her, of course, but your message was written in the manner of something that was directed to her at the end of her life. Your note was written in a very personalized style, and I do believe you were trying to convey support in a difficult time. I'm not sure if this answer is adequate. As I said, my own messages are often poorly received and are sometimes interpreted in a way that I did not intend. That is partly due to the impersonal forum of newsgroups where we begin to think that we know each other, but words printed on paper often cannot convey our feelings and sentiments in the same way that a personal hug and meeting can. You are obviously in pain as a result of reaction to your letter, but it is clear to me that you did not intend to be harsh or unkind. I think many others also know that. MaryL MaryL that was a wonderful way of explaining and I want to add one thing. If someone near and dear to you in geting close to leaving, as my son might well be, words, however well meant, can hurt and make us look where we don't want to look. If you had been close to this lady, I don't think those of us who had this reaction would have done so in quite the same way. >> Oh dear, what have I done? I certainly meant NO harm when I wrote about >> Shirley's death. I'm just sitting here in tears knowing I now have [quoted text clipped - 44 lines] > > MaryL I agree with you Granby, and purrs and prayers are lovingly sent for your son. And for you. I would never want to hurt anybody...I'm not like that. Love Kyla "Granby" > MaryL that was a wonderful way of explaining and I want to add one thing. > If someone near and dear to you in geting close to leaving, as my son [quoted text clipped - 54 lines] >> >> MaryL > "Kyla =^. .^=`" <kyla.water...@comcats.net> wrote in messagenews: > > If you all thought it was in bad taste, dreadful, then I guess it was,******** > > I lost my own Mother last August, and it still hurts. > I'm not sure if I can adequately answer your question about what was wrong > with your letter because my own messages are often poorly received and [quoted text clipped - 26 lines] > unkind. I think many others also know that. > MaryL AFA what is being replied (responded to, questions answer?) to. Sentence I listed first says it all. Author is truly puzzled at negative reactions ("IF"you all thought"..etc.) No indication of comprehension, only denial of intent. Who can "hate" (quote) a mind like this? Not me. Sentence two: my mother had the audacity to finally die on the first day (8/15/69) of the Woodstock Music Festival in Bethel, NY, for which I had 4 tickets, courtesy of my SIL who lived in that area. While my mother was being prepared for burial in the funeral home we 4 went to a local "Woodstock substitute" in Miami and I watched Janis do her thing on a giant screen instead of in person. In retrospect, I suppose it did spare me s Southern Comfort mini-shower for which she was famous. This has impacted my mental state only in that I have a permanent, handy reference to my mother's demise date. addendum: AS IF anyone cares, LOL. MaryL I admire your innate desire to educate (fulfilled so long by your work choice) plus your kindness attempting reassurance by your post here. Pam, where are you going for your "vacation" because I might join you. Did the 'cane have any effect on your NC location? We don't wanna go where a 'cane has just gone through....right? If anyone doesn't like my messages (?) too bad. Hospital personnel, present or former, have a different attitude toward the Grim Reaper, having practically sat down to dinner or coffee with Him more than a few times at work. He is quite selective, thank goodness. "MaryL" > > "Kyla =^. .^=`" >> Oh dear, what have I done? I certainly meant NO harm when I wrote about [quoted text clipped - 34 lines] > very personalized style, and I do believe you were trying to convey > support in a difficult time. Thank you for that MaryL. I appreciate your kind words. And I understand what you mean. I am so sorry about the loss of your own Mother. (((((((((((MaryL)))))))))))))) It's hard when we lose our Mothers, and I believe they are still watching over us. > I'm not sure if this answer is adequate. As I said, my own messages are > often poorly received and are sometimes interpreted in a way that I did [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > > MaryL Yes, I was crying my eyes out, but I honestly meant no harm. I'm not like that. Thank you for your kind reply Kyla > Oh dear, what have I done? I certainly meant NO harm when I wrote about > Shirley's death. I'm just sitting here in tears knowing I now have everyone [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > Kyla > --in tears because now I've lost all my friends Kyla - I know that everyone is different in how they approach times like this and I've learned to appreciate the good intent behind each attempt at comfort. I'm also sorry about your mother. I have admired Pam and her family for so long. Her unfailing love and support of her husband, children, and cats is something you can practically see just from reading her words. She has had to be so strong for so long. I admire her grace in doing so - her focus on the positive during such rough times - and her ability to use humour to keep everyone afloat. Purrs and good thoughts continue to come from my house to theirs. Take care, Susan M Otis and Chester "Susan M" >> Oh dear, what have I done? I certainly meant NO harm when I wrote about >> Shirley's death. I'm just sitting here in tears knowing I now have [quoted text clipped - 12 lines] > this and I've learned to appreciate the good intent behind each attempt at > comfort. Susan, I should never have written that letter I am so sorry for your loss of Grandma Shirley, and I do appreciate you trying to comfort me in 'your' time of grief. >I'm also sorry about your mother. Thank you, she was 84, and it will be a year in late August when she 'went home'. > I have admired Pam and her family for so long. Her unfailing love and > support of her husband, children, and cats is something you can > practically see just from reading her words. She has had to be so strong > for so long. I admire her grace in doing so - her focus on the positive > during such rough times - and her ability to use humour to keep everyone > afloat. Purrs and good thoughts continue to come from my house to theirs. I too have admired Pam and her family, even tho I've only been here since March. And I too am sending her purrs and good thoughts. Thank you for being kind enough to write me in your time of loss and grief (((((((((Susan and Family))))))) You take care too, sweetie. > Take care, > > Susan M > Otis and Chester Kyla Mosey, Pookie, Pipps and Sqweex Kyla, please don't take this to the other group, there are people hurting there too and without a lot of posts, it would be hard to explain. Not saying this to be mean but just don't see what point it would prove. > "Susan M" >>> Oh dear, what have I done? I certainly meant NO harm when I wrote about [quoted text clipped - 45 lines] > Kyla > Mosey, Pookie, Pipps and Sqweex Okay, no worries about that. I totally understand, and thank you:) Love Kyla "Granby" > Kyla, please don't take this to the other group, there are people hurting > there too and without a lot of posts, it would be hard to explain. Not [quoted text clipped - 53 lines] >> Kyla >> Mosey, Pookie, Pipps and Sqweex > Oh dear, what have I done? I certainly meant NO harm when I wrote about > Shirley's death. I'm just sitting here in tears knowing I now have [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > Kyla > --in tears because now I've lost all my friends Kyla, I don't know you, but I can tell you that what you come across as is a drama queen and someone who has to turn all drama into something about you. Many here do it but you're the master at it. Maybe you don't mean it, but I can't believe you've been on Usenet for 11 years and no one has called you a drama queen or even self-centered. I also think you mistake posts meant to be directed toward others as directed toward you because you can't read the attributions. Personally I don't care how others here perceive me any more because I've BTDT. I've gotten a tougher skin. I thought I had a tough side because my first intro to newsgroups was in hacker groups due to my job and a research assignment. I found I liked learning and liked the flaming atmosphere but in a personal group such as this is, you're just "you" and not a Usenet personna, and after a personal trauma in my life I found I wasn't so tough and couldn't even fake it. Don't know if that makes sense, but you are way too self centered and even when someone has just died you find a way to make a scene and turn it about you rather than just let it go. > Kyla, I don't know you, but I can tell you that what you come across > as is a drama queen and someone who has to turn all drama into > something about you. Many here do it but you're the master at it. > Maybe you don't mean it, but I can't believe you've been on > Usenet for 11 years and no one has called you a drama queen or > even self-centered. Danger Will Robinson: Alien Rant Approaching. This is not directed at you, Cheryl. If I say "you" in this post, I mean "you-in-general". My take is that Kyla has some very severe emotional problems and is unable to behave differently because of it. She is very emotionally volatile and gets extremely upset easily. This is all exacerbated by some pretty difficult physical problems which make it hard for her to do what she needs to do for her emotional issues. It's not good for people psychologically to sit at home in front of a computer all day, but if you have major mobility issues, you probably don't have much choice. I never take anything she says personally. I feel like most of what Kyla says here is a reflection of her own reality - of where she's at mentally and psychologically. It's not about me, and it's not about anyone else here, either. In other words, before you react negatively to one of Kyla's posts, remember that it's coming from someone who is probably overwhelmed with deep psychological stuff. To be honest, I think she sincerely cannot help it. This probably sounds patronizing as all hell, but I think it's the truth. I try to cut her slack and not take what she says to heart. I do believe she means very well, but she doesn't have very good boundaries. And I think that gets people's back up and they get all bristly about it. All you have to do is set your own limits, and then just allow her to do her thing. Really, she's not harming anyone here. If you (you-in-general) engage with her about her latest faux pas, who's to blame for that? Seriously, just let it go. And before anyone says, "But look at <RPCA Hero Of The Month>. She has a <Horrible Life Condition> and she is a Revered Saint because she Never Complains About Anything." Humans are not made out of cookie cutters. Some people have more inner resources than others. Why? It's a mystery. Maybe they were raised by better parents. Or maybe they have something in their brain chemistry that resists negativity, or allows them to continue. Maybe they fight back against problems with pure bitchery. Who knows. Everyone has their personal strengths and we also have *different* kinds of damage. You can't expect everyone to be able to do the same things. That's just ignorant. Nobody has any idea what kind of secret resources an individual person might have, no matter what their life might look like on the outside. We should never compare people to each other. Once again - this is not directed at you, Cheryl. I've been wanting to say this stuff for a while. Kyla is a magnet for people who think that everyone should be repressed, good little saints who never complain. She gets their knickers all in a twist. Can we all get over it, please? Kyla is not hurting anyone! End Of Rant. > I found I liked learning and liked the flaming atmosphere but in > apersonal group such as this is, you're just "you" and not a > Usenet personna, and after a personal trauma in my life I found I > wasn't so tough and couldn't even fake it. Cheryl, it sounds like you're doing a bit better, am I right? In any case, it's very nice to see you posting 'round these parts again.  SignatureJoyce ^..^ (To email me, remove the X's from my user name.) On Jul 21, 9:23 pm, bastXXXe...@sonic.net wrote: > My take is that Kyla has some very severe emotional problems and is > unable to behave differently because of it. She is very emotionally [quoted text clipped - 12 lines] > someone who is probably overwhelmed with deep psychological stuff. > To be honest, I think she sincerely cannot help it. > -- > Joyce ^..^ Whoa, as an "outsider," who mostly posts on rpchb (which I know many of you find disgusting, annoying, and offensive but which is actually just plain boring right now), this thread has a definite old rpchb feel to it. I have to say that to say what you said in your first paragraph is pretty harsh and if someone really does have emotional problems (and I'm not going to judge that--at least not publicly), it seems pretty cruel to say what you did. I guess your recipe-monitor is ill right now or this thread would have never gotten beyond some southern-fried, cajun-broiled, carnivore-lovin' dish. Yikes, you guys is meaner than us old rpchb'ers! I don't think anyone posts on Usenet to get an amateur psychiatric analysis for all the world to see. I'd be mortified if I really had deep psychological problems and this was directed at me. Of course, as it is, it makes me long for the old, flamin' days of rpchb again. C'mon, take it to rpchb!!!!!!!!!!!!! And utilize your KFs, wow, vicious. Candace > Whoa, as an "outsider," who mostly posts on rpchb (which I know many > of you find disgusting, annoying, and offensive but which is actually [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > problems (and I'm not going to judge that--at least not publicly), it > seems pretty cruel to say what you did. Worse than calling her a drama queen? And what is so bad about saying someone has emotional problems? If I said that so-and-so had cancer, or diabetes or some other serious physical problem, would that be considered harsh? It's only harsh if you think that emotional problems are an indication of something bad about the person. I don't blame her for it, or think that she is less worthy of respect or compassion than anyone else. But I think that if you read her posts, you can see that she has a lot of mood swings, strong, painful emotions, and does a lot of impulsive things. So I'm not pointing anything out that most of us have not already seen. The point of my post was simply that I don't think Kyla is deliberately being a drama-queen. I think that she's going through a lot and it sounds to me like it's pretty overwhelming. Why is saying that an insult to a person? I'm just asking people to cut her some slack because I don't see how she's hurting anyone. And if she's not hurting anyone, then there's no legitimate reason for anyone to object to what she does. SignatureJoyce ^..^ (To email me, remove the X's from my user name.) On Jul 22, 12:21 am, bastXXXe...@sonic.net wrote: > > Whoa, as an "outsider," who mostly posts on rpchb (which I know many > > of you find disgusting, annoying, and offensive but which is actually [quoted text clipped - 27 lines] > > (To email me, remove the X's from my user name.) Yes, I think it's worse than calling someone a drama queen. "Drama queen," just by its implication, is meant to be sort of funny. We call several of my co-workers that to their faces. I've been called it before. No one gets upset by that. I think even calling someone a f'ing nutcase is less cruel than what you said. I don't know quite how to explain it. When I was in college, many, many years ago, I lived in a coed dorm and, late at night, several of my friends and acquaintances would play what we called the "Truth Game." Well, when you're 18 or 19, at least back then, we were all kind of vulnerable and the rule of the game was that, if you played and stayed in the room to hear everyone else, you agreed to truthfully answer any question asked of you. You can imagine how people that age try to go for the weaknesses in others sometimes just to get a laugh or have a little fun. People in the group would be dissolved in tears over what they felt they had to say and it was kind of awful but not awful enough to stop. And it was the sort of thing where everyone felt the need/desire to "shrink" everyone else and, really, what could you know at the age of 18 when you're taking Psych 101? But the vulnerable, hurt, crying person would take to heart what the others said. It was only later, when talking about it to someone older and wiser, that I realized that people can damage other people by their lack of knowledge. I'd much rather someone call me a freaking whackjob than seriously discuss, for all the world to see, why they think I'm mentally ill or emotionally unstable. People need to save face and people maybe need to invent who they are, to some extent. "We tell ourselves stories in order to live." (Joan Didion, a writer who had some massive emotional/mental problems) I guess you didn't mean it viciously, I'm sure you didn't, but it's sort of pop psychology or psycho-babble, isn't it? And that can harm people. Everyone on Usenet forms opinions about people from what they write and, cripe, I've flamed with the best of them (well, in my opinion) in some groups but this group has a different bent...the kinder, gentler newsgroup. I'm surprised sometimes how some of the people here put themselves so blatantly "out there" for all the world to see. It just seems cruel to shoot someone down who has done that when it seems so encouraged here. And, face it, you guys are a little "cliquey," but it's not a private group, anyone can read it and join in. There's plenty of stuff about myself I wouldn't post here but a lot of people here do it. I realize I haven't explained anything and I'm beginning to bore even myself. I was just shocked by what you wrote and I was embarrassed for the person you directed it to. I wouldn't want to see that written about me after I had opened myself up to so many people. I would be very hurt and mortified. It's like I don't mind pissing people off or being a little bitchy to them but I don't really want to hurt someone on a personal level. And that seemed hurtful to me. Candace On Jul 22, 12:21 am, bastXXXe...@sonic.net wrote: > Candace <maccand...@aol.com> wrote: > [quoted text clipped - 29 lines] > > (To email me, remove the X's from my user name.) Yes, I think it's worse than calling someone a drama queen. "Drama queen," just by its implication, is meant to be sort of funny. We call several of my co-workers that to their faces. I've been called it before. No one gets upset by that. I think even calling someone a f'ing nutcase is less cruel than what you said. I don't know quite how to explain it. When I was in college, many, many years ago, I lived in a coed dorm and, late at night, several of my friends and acquaintances would play what we called the "Truth Game." Well, when you're 18 or 19, at least back then, we were all kind of vulnerable and the rule of the game was that, if you played and stayed in the room to hear everyone else, you agreed to truthfully answer any question asked of you. You can imagine how people that age try to go for the weaknesses in others sometimes just to get a laugh or have a little fun. People in the group would be dissolved in tears over what they felt they had to say and it was kind of awful but not awful enough to stop. And it was the sort of thing where everyone felt the need/desire to "shrink" everyone else and, really, what could you know at the age of 18 when you're taking Psych 101? But the vulnerable, hurt, crying person would take to heart what the others said. It was only later, when talking about it to someone older and wiser, that I realized that people can damage other people by their lack of knowledge. I'd much rather someone call me a freaking whackjob than seriously discuss, for all the world to see, why they think I'm mentally ill or emotionally unstable. People need to save face and people maybe need to invent who they are, to some extent. "We tell ourselves stories in order to live." (Joan Didion, a writer who had some massive emotional/mental problems) I guess you didn't mean it viciously, I'm sure you didn't, but it's sort of pop psychology or psycho-babble, isn't it? And that can harm people. Everyone on Usenet forms opinions about people from what they write and, cripe, I've flamed with the best of them (well, in my opinion) in some groups but this group has a different bent...the kinder, gentler newsgroup. I'm surprised sometimes how some of the people here put themselves so blatantly "out there" for all the world to see. It just seems cruel to shoot someone down who has done that when it seems so encouraged here. And, face it, you guys are a little "cliquey," but it's not a private group, anyone can read it and join in. There's plenty of stuff about myself I wouldn't post here but a lot of people here do it. I realize I haven't explained anything and I'm beginning to bore even myself. I was just shocked by what you wrote and I was embarrassed for the person you directed it to. I wouldn't want to see that written about me after I had opened myself up to so many people. I would be very hurt and mortified. It's like I don't mind pissing people off or being a little bitchy to them but I don't really want to hurt someone on a personal level. And that seemed hurtful to me. Candace *** Well said, Candace! I would add that telling the world someone has an illness, whether it is mental or physical, is not the thing to do. A person's health is their business. If they want to share it, fine. If not, they should be allowed their privacy. Joy > On Jul 22, 12:21 am, bastXXXe...@sonic.net wrote: > [quoted text clipped - 94 lines] > > Joy- Frankly, I don't even want to know about my OWN health. Symptoms are for people less squeamish than I am. I want my friends to be well, whether they are cats or hoomins or d*gs, or others. I want them to be happy and functional and get along. Given the way the universe works, it IS too much to ask but I ask it anyway. On the other hand, details of symptoms and treatments I can do without. -- Will in New Haven > I would add that telling the world someone has an illness, whether it is > mental or physical, is not the thing to do. A person's health is their > business. If they want to share it, fine. If not, they should be allowed > their privacy. But Joy, I'm not privy to any more information than anyone else. I wasn't violating any confidences. I was just offering my own opinion based on what I see, which is pretty much what everyone else sees. I just think we should all give Kyla a break and not take her actions to heart, because they seem motivated by a lot of pain and need, and do not seem to be motivated by maliciousness or even thoughtlessness. I know that if I were in a lot of pain, and if because of that I behaved in ways that annoyed other people, I would appreciate someone sticking up for me and saying, "Hey, Joyce is having a hard time, so could we all cut her some slack?" This is particularly true if the "hard time" is not due to a Socially Approved Reason, such dealing with death, illness, poverty, trauma, etc. Everyone knows to be nice to people who've just lost a loved one or who was just in a bad car accident or something. But what if the hard time is caused by internal problems? People are not quite so understanding or forgiving about that. And I think we should be, because internal causes of pain are just as legitimate as life circumstances. Anyway, it's just my observation and my own opinions, so take it for what it's worth. I don't expect everyone to agree, but opinions are like a******s, everyone has one. :) SignatureJoyce ^..^ (To email me, remove the X's from my user name.) On Jul 22, 2:30 pm, bastXXXe...@sonic.net wrote: > I just think we should all give Kyla a break and not take her actions > to heart, because they seem motivated by a lot of pain and need, and > do not seem to be motivated by maliciousness or even thoughtlessness. If you had stopped right there, it would have conveyed the same idea (let's give her a break, she does not mean ill) without being incredibly insensitive and cruel to someone who by your own admission, is in pain. Not cool. Cheers. Victor > On Jul 22, 2:30?pm, bastXXXe...@sonic.net wrote: >> I just think we should all give Kyla a break and not take her actions >> to heart, because they seem motivated by a lot of pain and need, and >> do not seem to be motivated by maliciousness or even thoughtlessness. > If you had stopped right there, it would have conveyed the same idea > (let's give her a break, she does not mean ill) without being > incredibly insensitive and cruel to someone who by your own admission, > is in pain. I think I now own this subject line. :) It's interesting to me that while several people have said I'm being cruel and insensitive, not a single person has disagreed with my conclusions. This tells me that these same people had already made the same observation I had. I didn't realize this, though. I thought I was offering an idea that might not have occurred to others. People have been giving her a pretty hard time about her behaviors. This tells me that they don't understand that it's really not her fault. So I was offering a reason as to why. For god's sake, someone else practically called her a "creepy stalker", and you're saying I'm cruel? SignatureJoyce ^..^ (To email me, remove the X's from my user name.) > I didn't realize this, though. I thought I was offering an idea that > might not have occurred to others. People have been giving her a pretty > hard time about her behaviors. This tells me that they don't understand > that it's really not her fault. So I was offering a reason as to why. My gawd, how patronizing is that - to Kyla and everyone else here? Please don't ever stick up for me like that! > For god's sake, someone else practically called her a "creepy stalker", > and you're saying I'm cruel? Clue - commenting on an action made by someone is a bit different than ascribing (possible) motives, causes or illnesses to that someone in order to excuse the action. CatNipped > conclusions. This tells me that these same people had already made > the same observation I had. Please don't conclude that on my behalf. > might not have occurred to others. People have been giving her a pretty > hard time about her behaviors. This tells me that they don't understand > that it's really not her fault. So I was offering a reason as to why. I honestly do not understand what the hoolaballoo is all about. When I saw the original post of her letter, I though, "how sweet of her". Then I read the letter and I thought it was clumsy, not quite what I would have said, but I "got" what she meant. No harm done as far as I could tell. I was very surprised at Pam's reaction. > For god's sake, someone else practically called her a "creepy stalker", > and you're saying I'm cruel? I don't respond to every message that gets posted on this group. :) Cheers. Victor SignatureVictor M. Martinez Owned and operated by the Fantastic Seven (TM) Send your spam here: uce@ftc.gov Email me here: pistorLITTER@BOXaustin.rr.com > It's interesting to me that while several people have said I'm being > cruel and insensitive, not a single person has disagreed with my > conclusions. This tells me that these same people had already made > the same observation I had. <snip> Ummmm - no. I at least have made no comment on your conclusions because this whole business has gotten way out of hand with inappropriate comments flying around in flocks, and I'd hoped by keeping my hands off the keyboard to at least avoid contributing to them. However, I do want to say that whether I agree or disagree with your conclusions is my own business, right up to the point at which you announce that you *know* what my conclusions are based on the fact that I haven't disagreed with you publicly. You don't. Cheryl P. >> It's interesting to me that while several people have said I'm being >> cruel and insensitive, not a single person has disagreed with my [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] > > Cheryl P. My sentiments exactly. Joy >> Worse than calling her a drama queen? > Yes, I think it's worse than calling someone a drama queen. "Drama > queen," just by its implication, is meant to be sort of funny. We > call several of my co-workers that to their faces. I've been called > it before. No one gets upset by that. I think even calling someone a > f'ing nutcase is less cruel than what you said. I don't know quite > how to explain it. It might just be that we have different frames of reference about what is seen as acceptable commentary and what goes over the line. I know what you mean about "drama queen" being a joke in some circumstances, but I've also heard it as a real slam against a person, something that people would say behind each other's back to ridicule them. So I guess it's just what you're used to. And it sounds like the truth game you played in college was deliberately cruel, where people went for the jugular and ridiculed each other's insecurities and vulnerabilities. I don't think that's what I was doing. Many people consider "emotional problems" something to be ashamed of, something one shouldn't mention openly. I don't see it that way. We all have emotional stuff, some more daunting than others. Why do people feel fine about saying they have chronic back pain, or heart disease, or sleep apnea, but not chronic depression? Why can we say we're on thyroid meds or insulin, but not anti-depressants? (Actually, on this newsgroup, many people have spoken openly about depression and about the meds they take for it, so it's not completely true that emotional stuff is considered too shameful to talk about - here, anyway.) > I guess you didn't mean it viciously, I'm sure you didn't, but it's > sort of pop psychology or psycho-babble, isn't it? You know, I really didn't say very much actual content about her state of mind, *why* she does what she does, etc., and that's because I don't know. Maybe the most specific I got, which you might categorize as "babble", was saying "she doesn't have good boundaries." However, this wasn't meant as psychological analysis. I was observing behavior. She doesn't conform to certain social expectations in her interactions, and some people have talked about it feeling invasive, or "too forward", etc. Her behavior also strikes me as impulsive. Again, I don't know why, and I didn't offer a reason. It's just what I see. Those things alone wouldn't cause me to conclude that someone has emotional issues, but when someone talks about crying their eyes out every day because some people have gotten mad at her, that seems like a lot of emotional pain to me. Again, it's not analysis. I don't know what the pain is about or what caused it, I can just see that there *is* a lot of pain. It sounds like you're saying that even if it's obvious, it's not good form to state it openly - is that it? > I'm surprised sometimes how some of the > people here put themselves so blatantly "out there" for all the world > to see. It just seems cruel to shoot someone down who has done that > when it seems so encouraged here. First, many people here use pseudonyms for that very reason. They might not be quite so forthcoming if they were posting under their real name. Second, I'd like to be clear that I did not shoot anyone down. It's not a put-down to observe that someone appears to be having a very difficult time emotionally. It's only a put-down if you think that having emotional problems is something to be ashamed of. SignatureJoyce ^..^ (To email me, remove the X's from my user name.) -- Joyce ^..^ (To email me, remove the X's from my user name.) > It sounds like you're saying that even if it's obvious, it's not good > form to state it openly - is that it? Exactly. It's the same thing as seeing someone in a wheelchair and commenting on that fact. It is rude, to say the least. Joy > > It sounds like you're saying that even if it's obvious, it's not good > > form to state it openly - is that it? > Exactly. It's the same thing as seeing someone in a wheelchair and > commenting on that fact. It is rude, to say the least. Why is that rude? Personally, I am far more uncomfortable when everyone talks *around* something, like it's just so shameful and horrifying to mention. I'm not advocating ridicule or criticism of someone, but a matter-of-fact statement about something obvious, if it's necessary to make that statement (for example, if you're talking about wheelchair accessibility in a public place), is not rude, IMO. And I do understand this from the receiving end, by the way. I'm a large woman, and I find it embarrassing and even kind of insulting when people stand around looking uncomfortable and Not Saying Anything, as though it's so horrifying and tragic that one must never mention it. I'm fat, what is so terrible? There are physical realities that come up, which might need to be discussed in some circumstances, and I'd rather people just be matter-of-fact about it, in the same way they would be about, say, a very tall man. (This is not an invitation to abuse or ridicule, btw. If someone doesn't understand the difference between a put-down and a simple statement of fact, their cognitive skills might need some development.) SignatureJoyce ^..^ (To email me, remove the X's from my user name.) > > > It sounds like you're saying that even if it's obvious, it's not good > > > form to state it openly - is that it? [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > > Why is that rude? Sheesh!!! It's rude if you are commenting about something which that person has not chosen to talk about first. If someone with an illness or disability wants to talk about it, then they will bring it up in conversation themselves. So, if Kyla is acting as she is because of a mental illness it is *her* place to bring it up, not someone else's. Also, you said yourself that you're not privy to Kyla's medical information, so why do you feel the need to speculate upon it - possibly being 100% wrong (and when you are spreading wrong information about someone, how is that different from lying about someone)? Personally, I wouldn't want someone "sticking up" for me by ascribing to me an illness I might not have - I might just have wanted to be bitchy on purpose! You have upbraided others (including me) about posting, not speculation, but a fact about someone, which you thought was too harsh and shouldn't have been posted (such as pointing out cat abuse) - why is that OK for you to do, but no one else? Why should you be able to criticize someone for posting an un-PC joke, but nobody else should criticize Kyla for being *much* more inappropriate to someone who has just lost a loved one? As I said several times now - I don't remember voting to elect a group moderator or PC police! CatNipped > It's rude if you are commenting about something which that person has not > chosen to talk about first. If someone with an illness or disability wants > to talk about it, then they will bring it up in conversation themselves. > So, if Kyla is acting as she is because of a mental illness it is *her* > place to bring it up, not someone else's. This, from the person who called her a "creepy stalker". SignatureJoyce ^..^ (To email me, remove the X's from my user name.) > > It's rude if you are commenting about something which that person has > > not [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > > This, from the person who called her a "creepy stalker". No, actually I said, "Asking for people's addresses, so you can send them cards or letters, when you don't even know them, is sort of creepy to me in a "stalkerish" sort of way." *Not* the same thing at all. If you had said, "Kyla is acting like she has emotional problems" that would have been *MUCH* different from stating that "Kyla has some very severe emotional problems and isunable to behave differently because of it." (and then going on for paragraphs specifically outlining those supposed problems). If you can't see that distinction, it isn't worth continuing to argue with you about it. CatNipped > Why should you be able to criticize someone for posting an un-PC joke, but > nobody else should criticize Kyla for being *much* more inappropriate to > someone who has just lost a loved one? It's clear to most of us that, while some people were taken aback by Kyla's post, she meant well. When you can convince me that telling a racist joke is "well-meaning", then maybe I'll see these two situations as analogous. SignatureJoyce ^..^ (To email me, remove the X's from my user name.) > > Why should you be able to criticize someone for posting an un-PC joke, > > but [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > Kyla's > post, she meant well. It really doesn't matter what Kyla "meant" to do, what she *did* do was highly inappropriate to (apparently) quite a few people and downright insulting to a person who *IS* dealing with a "Socially Approved Reason" for being in pain. *That* pain is no less than Kyla's supposed "emotional problems" - so why is it OK on the one hand but not on the other? > When you can convince me that telling a racist joke is "well-meaning", > then maybe I'll see these two situations as analogous. Nowhere did I say it was "well-meaning", and it's only *your* interpretation that it was racist (as a few others have said, I took it as poking fun at the national hysteria we have about terrorists). What I *did* say was that I thought it was inappropriate for you to make someone else feel uncomfortable about posting what she meant as a little internet humor passed along. Would you want your every post monitored by someone who will decide for the group what is and what isn't appropriate to post? So tell me this, why do you find it OK to hurt Pam, who is dealing with a horrendous and painful situation, but it's not OK for others to tell Kyla she was being inappropriate? I've said it in different ways, trying to be polite, and that doesn't seem to have penetrated, so I'll say it like this - who died and made you queen of the newsgroup? CatNipped > > > It sounds like you're saying that even if it's obvious, it's not > > > good [quoted text clipped - 35 lines] > of > fact, their cognitive skills might need some development.) And if someone doesn't understand certain social conventions, their social skills might need some development. If they choose to ignore social conventions for whatever reason, they may need to accept some fallout. Social convention. It is rude to state that someone is mentally ill, either to their face or to others. (It is also rude to say a lot of other personal things to or about them if they have not in fact invited such comments) Social convention. It is rude, when someone tells a joke, to say "that isn't funny". You don't have to laugh. You don't have to agree. You can turn away. You may want to reread what Pam posted, and then your reply. Words like nasty, bigotry, stupid, dangerous, attitudes. Pretty strong personal attack for something relatively innocuous. Social convention. If you have a condition (for lack of a better word) that can make things difficult for you or for others, it is up to you to own that and make it possible for others to make any allowances that are necessary. I'm deaf and I lip read. I get very tired of telling virtual strangers that I am deaf and lip read and that I need them to look at me when they speak. Tough. Its my job and I'm the only one that can do it. Same goes for a situation where my weight might be an issue. If I need to sit at a table rather than in a booth, it is up to me to say so. If I need a seatbelt extension on an airplane, it is up to me to ask for one. Same goes for anyone who is too short or too tall or can't open a bottle or whatever. Jo >> > > It sounds like you're saying that even if it's obvious, it's not good >> > > form to state it openly - is that it? [quoted text clipped - 51 lines] > > Jo Thank you, Jo! You said that *much* better than I have (apparently) been able - and you were much *nicer* about it too! ;> Hugs, CatNipped > Social *convention*. <snip> > Social *convention*. <snip> > Social *convention*. <snip> (My emphasis) Well, I have no interest whatsoever in being *conventional*. I realize this is a big problem for some people here. This newsgroup is clearly dominated by people who share a very, very conventional outlook on the world. This is an outlook where racist jokes are innocuous, but criticizing them is rude. (Ask yourself, Jo, if someone had posted a stereotypical joke about black people being criminals, or gay people being perverts, or Jews ripping you off, would you find that equally acceptable?) This is an outlook that clearly cannot distinguish between fantasies and reality. It's an outlook that is insular and safe and so very shocked by any idea or behavior that is out of the norm. Not everyone here is like this. Lots of people who frequent this space are capable of thinking outside this extremely narrow box, and I enjoy corresponding with every one of those people. So I'm not referring to the newsgroup at large. But lord. Some very narrow-minded people have been extremely vocal lately. I'm choking to death on Wonderbread. I'm killing this thread after posting this, because I'm really tired of arguing about it. You're not going to be open to my world view because it's just too weird and out-there for you, and you don't get it. I'm not going to be open to your world view because I've spent a lifetime being inundated by it and I know it inside out, and I already know that it's not for me. SignatureJoyce ^..^ (To email me, remove the X's from my user name.) > > Social *convention*. <snip> > [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > realize > this is a big problem for some people here. Sorry, but even with the shifting meaning of the language, convention still isn't a dirty word. These are generally acceptable behaviors, not laws. They are based on a respect for the feelings of others and responsibility for self. It isn't narrow minded to treat someone you disagree with decently. It has nothing to do with someone's politics or outlook on the world or the quality of their world view. And for the record, I'm not aware that religion, whatever it may or may not be was an attribute of race. Jo > > > It sounds like you're saying that even if it's obvious, it's not good > > > form to state it openly - is that it? [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > make that statement (for example, if you're talking about wheelchair > accessibility in a public place), is not rude, IMO. It is not rude, of course, to talk about wheelchair accessibility - if the person who is in a wheelchair beside you has brought it up as a topic of conversation. It is rude to say "oh, I notice you are in a wheelchair, why is that?" > And I do understand this from the receiving end, by the way. I'm a large > woman, and I find it embarrassing and even kind of insulting when people [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > just be matter-of-fact about it, in the same way they would be about, > say, a very tall man. What is matter of fact to say about a fat person or a tall man? "Wow, aren't you just so huge? how did you get like that?" or "Hiya, Lofty, is it cold up there?" Of course not. It is rude and insensitive. It does not need to be mentioned how the human form varies in case it causes hurt for those who do not correspond to "the norm" whatever that is. Tweed My husband was in a car accident and in a wheelchair for many years. Some of the best conversations we had were from questions from kids like "How did your legs get broke." Or, Mr. what happened to you? " Bob always answered because he felt that even though it sometimes was embarrassing, depending on where we were. He felt someone might need help someday and that kid would have learned that people in chairs are just PEOPLE With myself having a rather bad vision problem, I have to tell you how my Son handled people who were rude about physical problems. My son has a vascular disease and has lost one leg and half of the other foot. Right after he had his leg off we were going into a Denny's for dinner. I was pushing Bob in his chair, more hanging on to follow him truth be told. Mike was on his crutches holding the door for us. Some lady burst into tears, came up and grabbed me in a bear hug with the following speech. "Oh you poor dear, you have your hands full. We should all pray for you to have the strength to care for these two men. My Son nearly fell off his crutches then, looked her in the eye and said "If we hadn't let this Blind one drive, we wouldn't be in this shape." Poor lady ran dragging her husband and to get away from us. It was rude of him and, after I stopped laughing I told him so. >> > > It sounds like you're saying that even if it's obvious, it's not good >> > > form to state it openly - is that it? [quoted text clipped - 31 lines] > > Tweed Ok, Granby! Glad I wasn't having a cuppa when I read your post! It may have been rude (I'm not so sure it was, btw) but how funny!!! You guys handled it so well!! --Kim > My husband was in a car accident and in a wheelchair for many years. Some > of the best conversations we had were from questions from kids like "How did [quoted text clipped - 53 lines] >> >> Tweed Yes, but you expect it from kids. I used to take my 4 yo brother on the bus sometimes, he was observant. "Why is that lady so fat?" (she was pregnant) or on another occasion "LOOK LOOK at that little lady!! (she had achrondroplasia - formerly known as dwarfism) Whilst it was embarrassing as his little chiming voice rang out all over the bus, it was acceptable as everyone realised he knew no better. Adults do and there is no real excuse for it IMO. > My husband was in a car accident and in a wheelchair for many years. Some > of the best conversations we had were from questions from kids like "How [quoted text clipped - 58 lines] >> >> Tweed How most of us react to questions depends on how they are asked. Remarks as to size and such are rude not questions. I really hate the term Blind Lady. I usually turn around and something like No, I am a lady who happens to be Blind. Lee used to have a dog and people would say "Look at the Blind Dog" Lee's answer, "Oh my God I hope not!" As you say though, rude is rude!!! > Yes, but you expect it from kids. I used to take my 4 yo brother on the > bus sometimes, he was observant. "Why is that lady so fat?" (she was [quoted text clipped - 69 lines] >>> >>> Tweed > My husband was in a car accident and in a wheelchair for many years. Some > of the best conversations we had were from questions from kids like "How did [quoted text clipped - 21 lines] > > It was rude of him and, after I stopped laughing I told him so. I was able to keep the Diet Coke (tm) off the keyboard. But you came close. – Will in New Haven "There is a road, no simple highway Between the dawn and the dark of night And if you go, no one may follow That path is for your steps alone" Robert Hunter, Greatful Dead, “Ripple” off AMERICAN BEAUTY Sorry folks, wasn't sure how people would take it, you have to laugh somtimes or you would cry and that is not acceptable, most of the time. On Jul 22, 7:14 pm, "Granby" <s...@joink.com> wrote: > My husband was in a car accident and in a wheelchair for many years. Some > of the best conversations we had were from questions from kids like "How [quoted text clipped - 24 lines] > > It was rude of him and, after I stopped laughing I told him so. I was able to keep the Diet Coke (tm) off the keyboard. But you came close. – Will in New Haven "There is a road, no simple highway Between the dawn and the dark of night And if you go, no one may follow That path is for your steps alone" Robert Hunter, Greatful Dead, “Ripple” off AMERICAN BEAUTY If you hadn't posted that on a previous occasion I might have ruined my keyboard too. :-) > Sorry folks, wasn't sure how people would take it, you have to laugh > somtimes or you would cry and that is not acceptable, most of the > time. SignatureAdrian (Owned by Snoopy, Bagheera & Shadow) Cats leave pawprints on your heart http://community.webshots.com/user/clowderuk > My husband was in a car accident and in a wheelchair for many years. Some > of the best conversations we had were from questions from kids like "How [quoted text clipped - 21 lines] > > It was rude of him and, after I stopped laughing I told him so. ROTFLMAOWTIME! You obviously reared a very exceptional young man. Good for him, and good job, you! Hugs, CatNipped > My husband was in a car accident and in a wheelchair for many years. Some > of the best conversations we had were from questions from kids like "How > did your legs get broke." Or, Mr. what happened to you? " Bob always > answered because he felt that even though it sometimes was embarrassing, > depending on where we were. He felt someone might need help someday and > that kid would have learned that people in chairs are just PEOPLE That was a funny story btw. Rob tells people that he got the scars and dents in the side of his head because I hit him in it with a frying pan. You'd be surprised by the number of people who seem to believe him. So I've dug my shorts out of storage and am wearing those now. People stare at all the scars on my legs and the missing part of my thigh and then Rob tells them I hit him in the head with a frying pan and I say "Yeah, after you bit the back of my leg off." People tend not to ask after that. Pam S. with an evil and warped sense of humor. Go girl. It is too bad that we have to do silly things like that to teach people...well...not sure we teach them much. >> My husband was in a car accident and in a wheelchair for many years. >> Some of the best conversations we had were from questions from kids like [quoted text clipped - 15 lines] > > Pam S. with an evil and warped sense of humor. >> My husband was in a car accident and in a wheelchair for many years. >> Some of the best conversations we had were from questions from kids [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] > after you bit the back of my leg off." People tend not to ask after > that. My DH is so fat because he ate my first husband? Yowie > My DH is so fat because he ate my first husband? I told someone once that I'm a Sumo wrestler and on a special diet because I need to bulk up. Pam S. >> My husband was in a car accident and in a wheelchair for many years. >> Some of the best conversations we had were from questions from kids [quoted text clipped - 15 lines] > that. > Pam S. with an evil and warped sense of humor. I do hope I get to meet you and Rob some day. :-) SignatureAdrian (Owned by Snoopy, Bagheera & Shadow) Cats leave pawprints on your heart http://community.webshots.com/user/clowderuk BEVERAGE WARNINGS ARE REQUIRED ;-) > My husband was in a car accident and in a wheelchair for many years. Some > of the best conversations we had were from questions from kids like "How [quoted text clipped - 58 lines] >> >> Tweed Sorry friend, I wasn't sure anyone would think that was as funny as I did. Different strokes and all that. > BEVERAGE WARNINGS ARE REQUIRED ;-) >> My husband was in a car accident and in a wheelchair for many years. [quoted text clipped - 62 lines] >>> >>> Tweed > My husband was in a car accident and in a wheelchair for many years. Some > of the best conversations we had were from questions from kids [quoted text clipped - 19 lines] > this shape." > Poor lady ran dragging her husband and to get away from us. Now THAT needed a giant BW at the front. *Guffaw* Have added it to the subject line Yowie > My husband was in a car accident and in a wheelchair for many years. �Some > of the best conversations we had were from questions from kids like "How did [quoted text clipped - 65 lines] > > - Show quoted text - ================================== I love ya granby. As far as I'm concerned a good gimp quip is always welcome. Not all of us in wheelchairs considered themselves confined. But it has been years since I've had a good wheelchair dragrace. Suz&Spicey > > > It sounds like you're saying that even if it's obvious, it's not good > > > form to state it openly - is that it? [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > make that statement (for example, if you're talking about wheelchair > accessibility in a public place), is not rude, IMO. The problem is that you brought up a subject that is painful for many people, so it can be seen as inconsiderate unless you know she would find it "okay" to discuss these issues in public. I have diabetes, and I am very open in discussing it. In fact, I *like* to be able to communicate with others because I feel that I have learned more that way and have even been able to help some others. But I would not divulge that information about anyone else unless I knew that it was acceptable to him/her to do so. MaryL > > Whoa, as an "outsider," who mostly posts on rpchb (which I know many > > of you find disgusting, annoying, and offensive but which is actually [quoted text clipped - 22 lines] > don't see how she's hurting anyone. And if she's not hurting anyone, > then there's no legitimate reason for anyone to object to what she does. Agreed time to move one People and it needs to stop please We all have had our times here good and bad Simple words kill file if it bothers you move on if there is a problem This is so YUMMY! ESTHER’S PASTA CARBONARA INGREDIENTS: · pasta · 1 small onion, chopped finely · bacon pieces · garlic · oil · butter · thickened cream · 3 eggs · parmesan DIRECTIONS: 1. Boil pasta 2. Fry 1 small onion (chopped finely), bacon pieces, & garlic in ½ oil, ½ butter. When done, remove from heat, add thickened cream and stir. 3. Prepare eggs (2 whole eggs & 1 yolk). Whisk eggs, add salt, pepper, & parmesan. 4. Place onion mix back on heat, warm – BUT DO NOT BOIL. Add drained pasta, mix/heat through. 5. On a low heat, add egg mix stirring continuously (in order to avoid egg curdling). Serve immediately. > This is so YUMMY! Thank you Flippy! :) SignatureVictor M. Martinez Owned and operated by the Fantastic Seven (TM) Send your spam here: uce@ftc.gov Email me here: pistorLITTER@BOXaustin.rr.com FLippy Did Id osomething wrong or did you just link on me > This is so YUMMY! > [quoted text clipped - 27 lines] > 5. On a low heat, add egg mix stirring continuously (in order to avoid egg > curdling). Serve immediately. Relax, Matthew. I was just giving you my sister's recipe. > FLippy Did Id osomething wrong or did you just link on me >> This is so YUMMY! >> [quoted text clipped - 27 lines] >> 5. On a low heat, add egg mix stirring continuously (in order to avoid >> egg curdling). Serve immedia |
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