Bandit:  female, 16-year-old, DLH tabby, 9.5 pounds, black/brown/tan/grey,
nickname = B*tch Cat From H*ll
Demi:  female, 7-year-old, DLH white, 7.5 pounds, pure white with pink nose,
paws, etc., nicknames = Ghost Cat, Gone in 60 Nano-seconds
JessiCat:  female, 6-year-old DSH, tortoiseshell, 7.5 pounds, nicknames =
Jessie, JetSki
Samantha:  female, 2-year-old, DLH, tabby, 17 pounds, black/grey/tan/white,
nicknames = Sammy, Samazon, The Incredible Bulk, Catzilla, Wide Load

Lily (USA)
1 year old calico, loves to drink from the faucet and should do well on a
sea-faring trip. She is currently secrepurry of the Hoolikitty '05 clan.

Lily & her mama

Helen M's Clowder,

His Royal Feline Lordship Tiger (a.k.a. HRFL), senior Statescat and
Diplocat. 8 year old, One eyed, black, 9lb, South London boy made good,
who has travelled the world and speaks several different languages
including but not limited to, Cat, Dog, Spanish, German, Human, some
Parrot, Hamster, and Chinese.

Princess Pandora, 6 year old, 10lb tabby and white girlie kitty, HRFL's
One true love, a.k.a. "Pan Pan".

Robbie, a.k.a. "The Ginger Ninja". 10 years old, 7 1/2lb red tabby, with
a white tip on his tail, and he's the local enforcer around here. Has
travelled extensively, and spent 3 years in USA.

Cleo, 2 year old shy girl cat. 12lbs, a.k.a. "Jelly Belly". Afraid of
most things, but likes singing to the humans when they are sitting on
the porcelin throne.

Lily Whiskers, 6 month old, one eyed, Tabby and White Hoolikitten. Loves
everybody, and also like water and food.

Helen M

Shmoggleberry & IBKFergus are happy to be written about (Actually, Shmogg
thinks it is his right and due). Fluffy begs to be included, after all, she
is a cat on the inside. You can add Cary too, but perhaps we ought to call
him 'CJ' or 'The Bear' just in case. He keeps kibble in his ears for the
cats.....

This should be fun!

Yowie

The Brooklyn Boyz report for duty:

Stinky: Almost 15, black and high white, 13 lbs.  Green eyes.  Sweet,
sweet, sweet disposish, lerves, lerves, lerves his mommy.  Sings and
plays the piano, catches mousies (he thinks they're just groovy toys).
AKA Burrito Bandito, Stink, The Stink, Monsieur le Stinkitude, the
StinkMan, StinkyDink, StinkyPie, Sweetie Boy, Baby, etc. etc.
Extremely helpful  and very funny cat.  Almost perfect gentlecat,
except for . . . .

Dante: 8 1/2 months, tuxedo with black mask, 9 lbs.  Green eyes.  Also
lerves, lerves, lerves his mommy, also lerves to jump on Stink, who
then sorts him out.  Wiggly tail.  Says "Nyow-wow?"  Cheerful, cheeky,
slightly smug, collects drinking straws, and PLAYS PLAYS PLAYS all
day, and most of the night. SO MANNY GREEBLINS SO LIDDL TIME!!!

Theresa
Stinky Pictures: http://community.webshots.com/album/125591586JWEFwh
My Blog: http://www.humanitas.blogspot.com

Make Levees, Not War

Purr-mission freely granted by Mistletoe, slightly put off at the moment
because Pop won't let her have her rightful place on his shoulder.

Our Smokey says "yeah, whatever.  Is there more food in the dish yet?"

All/any of my owners would be proud to appear in your book:

Abelard:  7-lb cougar-wannabe, blind in right eye (could wear a black
patch?), would prefer to live on shrimp, fish, asparagus, shrimp. brussels
sprouts, fish and corn

Baby Eyes:  "fluffy" grey asthmatic lover of all creatures great and small,
even those on the television, won't eat gooshy food unless another cat ate
it first and lost it

Beatrice:  smallish stripey orange fuzzball dedicated to ear-sucking and
wrestling

Billy:  giant ferocious frisky green-eyed silver tabby ragdoll type with
very long hair

Eli:  huge, black, reformed terrorist, rat-killing mama's boy

Lily:  tan-grey-white LH mama's girl, loves to lick the human body

Tommy:  15-lb. mackeral tabby lapfungus loverboy angelpuss, catches prey for
his peers whenever possible, loves to ambush and bite human ankles

I'm sure Frank and Nikki would have approved.

Frank (27 Nov 1987-8 Dec 2005): black-and-white tuxedo, garters,
distinguished goatee beard, ~12 pounds at best. Yellow eyes. Polite,
kind to kittens and strangers, velvet-pawed ruler of hoomins. Deeply in
love with Waffles.

Nikki (15 Aug 1988-22 May 2005): Mostly black tuxedo, huge golden eyes,
~8 pounds at best. Feisty. Fierce huntress. Did not balk at diving into
the water to catch water moles. Ate most of her kill. Remained tiny. And
fierce. Did I mention fierce? Had many admirers among the boycats. Liked
them young. Last known boyfriend: Jazz.

In case the younger generation makes an appearance:

Miranda (30 Nov 2004-): Blue. Greenish golden eyes. 7 pounds. Monkeycat.
Climbs anything; shower curtains, drapes, trees, enclosure netting.
Makes long leaps effortlessly. Tentative wink-wink: Barnabus from Stone
Mountain, Georgia.

Caliban (15 Apr 2005-): Brown tabby and white. Huge golden eyes. Pink
nose. 12 pounds. Clumsy, things fall about wherever he goes. Good
climber in spite of clumsiness (he learned from the master, Miranda).
Extremely food-oriented. EXTREMELY food-oriented. Did I mention he likes
his food? Or anyone's food, for that matter. He's not picky. He chews
the screws on the new cat tree.

Sure, you can use Vino, international cat of mystery.  11 lbs of peaches
and cream cuteness with a definite bastardly streak.  Not too
co-ordinated due ot missing tail, so probably not of much use in
climbing up high on the ship's mast or anything.  But he's used to
travel, changes in scenery and he can do a Jedi mind trick where
everyone who lays eyes upon his cuteness is suddenly distracted and this
gives Vino a chance to get away with all sorts of crimes!

Don't know if any of mine are in the crew or not, but here are descriptions
of them

Smokey, approximately 13yo, DSH, all grey (like a Russian Blue), missing
most of her teeth but still eats her kibble like it's going out of style.
Weight 9lbs  Nicknames: Smokey Nokems, Ol' Grey Cat, Anti-social She-b!tch
from hell.

Tennessee Tuxedo,  12yo, DSH, black with a white 'bow tie' on his throat and
'cumerbund' on his belly (can't see that one unless he's playing rolly-polly
or jumping down from something and you're behind him).  Missing one upper
fang. Loves to eat, sleep and be a grump.  Weight 15lbs.  Nicknames:
Buckethead, Jabba, Cartman, Crushinator, Grumpy-boy.

Lizzie, 4yo DSH, Grey tabby with white tusedo style belly/legs/face and
orange & orange stripey patches (almost as if the maker couldn't decide if
she was going to be orange tabby & white or grey tabby & white, so he chose
both).  Only likes kibble (turns her nose up at canned food), and rules the
house with an iron paw.  Weight 8-9lbs.  Nicknames: Lizzie-butt, Elizabeth,
Queeen Elizabeth, Lizzard Kitty.

Sir Weeble Wobblybottom, 2.8yo DSH.  Black except for a few white hairs here
& there, most notably in his 'armpits' and on his belly (none of which is
noticable unless you look for it), and in his ears. Was abandoned as an
infant, and treated like royalty by his adoptive parents.  Is a very mild
mannered kitty, almost timid, and very polite (always askes permission
before jumping onto a lap).  Loves His Purple Puffball, and his girlfriend,
Persia.  Weight 10lbs.  Nicknames: Weeblenator, Weebs, My
Shiney-black-Bunny-soft-Hand-raised-Weeble-baby.

Ernie, 2yo DSH, Mostly white except for a grey stripey tail, 3 grey stripey
spots on his left side and one on his head.  Big goofey boy has the same
feral MamaKat as Weeble, and is litermates to Mimi & Moe.  Weight 14lbs.
Nicknames: Big boy, Curshinator Jr, Almost-all-white-kitty, big lug Big E
(since he has a younger brother that we mistake for him).

Mimi, 2yo DSH.  Mostly white except for a grey stripey tail, with a few
spots of orange on it, 3 stipey spots on her back/rump that forma a
distorted Mickey Mouse, with an orange cap of hair :D, and a grey stripey
head (but white face) and a spot of orange on her forehead. With her, 'it's
all about meeeeeeeeeeeeee' in her squeaky little voice,hence her name.  It's
always "feed meeeeeeeeeee", "pet meeeeeeeeeeee"   "meeeeeeeeeee,
meeeeeeeeeeeee, meeeeeeeeeeeeeee".  Mostly, it's the "feed
meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee", as she loves to eat.  She's a short -bodied cat that
should only wigh 8-9lbs, but she weighs 12 (she's fairly round)!  She also
loves her boyfriend, Boyfriend. Littermates with Ernie & Moe.  Nicknames:
Mimi-Tot, Butterball.  Sweet Mimi.

Moe, 2yo DSH boy-in-a-girl-cat's-body (she's a girl).  white face, belly and
some on the legs, grey stipeys the rest of her, with a splotch on her nose
(Moe nose).  Loves fetching bottlecaps, especially metal ones, and doing
upside-downy head while standing or sitting - which we termed flippy-head.
Littermate to Ernie & Mimi.  Weighs a 'juicy' 8lbs (she has a 'fat pocket'
on her belly, but there's very little fat in it).  Nicknames: MoeTater,
Taterhead, SweetTater, JuicyTater.

Ping, 2yo Siamese. Seal points.  Was fawn colored on his body when he first
moved in with us, but now the only light parts are on his throat (purr-box
area) and belly - all the rest of him has darkened considerably. Loves to
sing and nussle your head when you're trying to sleep.  Was a great playmate
for Bam-Bam, Barney & Betty when they were little.   Weight (a long skinny)
11lbs.  Nicknames: Pinaling da Dingaling, PinPing, SinginPing, MonkeyBoy (he
loves high places).

Miss Priss, 7yo DLH tortie.  She's a b!tch, and she shows it, especially to
the other cats.  Loves ear-skritchies and mooching food when it's hoomin
mealtime (soo cute when she goes to snag a morsel off the edge of the
table - her left front paw is orange, right black - she can barely reach the
table, so it's like the little old ladies driving the huge cars in Florida).
Weight 7-8lbs.  Nicknames: not publishale in a childrens book ;)

Bam-Bam, 6mo DSH.  All white except for grey stripey tail (with a white ring
near the base, then more grey stripe), grey patch on left of the back of his
head, and grey stripey splash on the left side of his face (including nose).
He's a cuddlebug that loves following Ping to his high places. Same feral
Mama as Weeble, littermate to Barney & Betty.  Weight, 5-6lbs (not sure,
haven't weighed them in a while, but he's gonna be a big boy like his oler
brother Ernie).  Nicknames: Two-Face, Harvey Dent (in the Batman comics, a
bad guy is named Two-Face after a disfiguring accident, his real name is
Harvey Dent), Phantom-of-the-opera-kitty, rumble-bug.  Little E (since we
often mistake him for Ernie)

Barney, 6mo DSH.  All whaite with grey stripey tail (that has a white tip),
several grey stripey spots scattered over his back & sides, grey stripey
head.  Loves CHEEEZ.  Always pretends to be STARVING so we'll put out food.
Also follows Ping to his high plaes (and a few that Ping doesn't go - like
the tops of doors).  Littermate to Babm-Bam & Betty.  Weighs less than
Bam-Bam.  Nicknames:  Boogerbutt, White-tippy-tail boy.  Bearded Barney
Boogerbutt (there is a patch of hair on his chin that grows a bit longer
than the rest - looks like a gootee), Starvin Marvin.

Betty, 6mo DSH.  Black except for splashes of white in her left armpit and
belly.  Bit me the first time I held her, but now will curl up on my lap and
purr, as if she's saying she's sorry she bit me.  Luvs her Unka Ping.  And
Weeble's Purple Puffball. Littermate to Bab-Bam & Barney.  Weighs about the
same as Barney.  Nicknames:  Bettina, Boogetyeyes,  Weeblette (she's the
younger twin sister of Weeble)

Did I leave anyone out?

Oh boy...

Stosh (Stanislaus Tejbir): 16 pound bulky, muscular tuxie,
Ritalin-challenged; likes to swing on Mama's braid at night, give massages
and hunt rolls of toilet paper.

Roxie (Ryoko Sakura): 8 pounds of svelte, supermodel tuxie; built like a
cheetah; likes to pose, climb into very high places and speaks in a
multisyllabic language of mixed trills, squeaks and meows. Her sworn enemy
is the domestic ham sandwich, which she feels a neurotic compulsion to hunt
and eat when in its vicinity.

Brandy Alexandra: 14 pound calico with white shirtfront, makes a career out
of cute; loves to play Hulk Hogan; whines to get her way; likes to chew
shoes and says "arf!"

Odessa Tatyana: 10 pounds of all black cat with a narrow, long white strip
down her belly. Loves to play tag and is an unrepentant niphead; she has a
very foul mouth and can cuss the air blue.

Fritzie (RB), also known as The Emanation of the Great Cat, the first
revealer of the Fritzian Religion to the Prophet Jeff in 1995. Note to
Helen: I think I mentioned an "autobiography" of Fritzie to you and it is in
the works, as well as its sequel starring my four. Let me know if you may be
still interested!

Blessed be,
Baha
Papess, Membership body, and Admissions Committee of the Mother Church of
Fritzianity, a division of J.R. "Bob" Dobbs LLC for the benefit of Subgenii
catslaves

Cricket:  Gray faded tabby cat, big friendly cat, RB
Silky: black and white tuxedo Sylvester patterned cat, semiferal, RB
Shamrock: Calico cat, quite friendly, RB
Sasquach: Grey tabby with extra toes, RB
Cinnamon: tan tabby cat, really friendly, RB

By length of service:

Jasper, a 9 yo black male DSH.  Has a great knowledge of the law of England
and Wales, mostly gained by sitting on his hoomin's work papers.  An adept
hunter.

Carrie: black and white female DSH of indeterminate age, but probably around
10.  The word "cuddlesponge" was invented just for her.

Fenchurch: white and black female DSH of indeterminate age, but probably no
older than 3.  A feisty girlcat who spent some while holed up in our garage
before becoming a resident. Also known as Slutcat owing to having found her
in the garage with various of her lovers (she has since been spayed).
Possessed of an evil temper and a potty mouth.

Bertie: creamy tabby male DSH aged around four; may well have some Bengal in
him. Inquisitive, affectionate, and possessed of very crossed blue eyes and
a voice like a foghorn.  Fenchurch adores him.

OK, here they are:

Smudge: 9-year-old, medium-hair female. Dark grey with white
underneath, and a couple of grey smudges on her muzzle, which gave
her her name. She's a small kitty under that fluffy fur. Smudge
loves, loves, loves the outdoors. She's also very willful and
demanding, and when she doesn't get her way (such as when I won't
allow her to go out after midnight), she yowls incessantly. But she's
also very sweet and affectionate, and requires her daily cuddle. Her
purr is quiet, but constant - she'll purr if you just look at her.
Smudge is a smart, loyal, dependable kitty.

Roxy: 8-year-old stripey brown tabby with lots of white underneath, a
bit chubby, with satin-smooth fur. She has a pretty round face and a
sweet disposition. The most patient cat I've ever met, she can sit
for over an hour watching a spider slowly crawl toward her without
moving a muscle. When it finally reaches her, however, she's useless.
She has no clue about the purpose of hunting. But she is very playful
and gets the zoomies every single day. She loves to roll on her back
and assume the "Fetching"(TM) pose. She has feline herpes and usually
sports a rivulet of brownish-pinkish goop running from her right eye.
(This is from scarring of the tear duct and doesn't mean her eye
bothers her.) She's very cuddly and loves to rub noses and purr in my
ear, several times a day.

Licky: 3 years old, mostly black with white front bib, chin, and
toes, plus dramatic white whiskers (he insisted I add the part about
the whiskers). He's sleek and shiny and absolutely beautiful. His
name is short for Licorice, for obvious reasons. Licky is a skittish
kitty and probably wasn't fully socialized to humans. He does love to
be petted, though, on his own terms. If I'm sitting down, he will rub
against me and mew for attention. I'll reach my hand down and he'll
pace back and forth, giving my hand big headbutts. And if he's
feeling especially brave (or needy) he'll jump up on my desk and curl
up in my arms, sometimes for hours. His purr is a ROAR. And he loves
to play with his green foam ball (which is now filthy). He'll bring
it into where I am, drop it on the floor nearby, and mew for me to
throw it for him. Licky is NOT clueless about hunting! When he runs
for the ball (low to the ground, very serious) he looks like a black
leopard. In reality, though, he's afraid of most people, and will dive
under the bed if the doorbell rings. But he loves his meowmy.

Whoops, I see that the entry for each cat is longer than the one
before it! :) I guess got carried away. Please feel free to pick and
choose whichever facts you'd like to use, if you choose to include
my babies in your tales. I (and they) would be honored!

Joyce

  The details are, of course, in the sig.

  Nanki Poo likes to prove he is a 12-year old kitten by letting live
frogs loose in the house.  Life would be perfect if he did not have to
visit the vet every two or so months, and if Minke did not like sleeping
on him.

  Minke does not remember who I am and runs away until I reassure him.
Sometimes he does not even remember Liz!  He brings in the odd bird and
mouse, usually dead.  He loves Uncle Nanki Poo.