Tomtom,

She's a cat.  I have one (Cherry) who wouldn't deign to touch any of
us-- until about two months ago.  Suddenly she started sleeping at the
foot of my bed, then lying with two paws on my shoulder-- she's very
affectionate and possessive!  It only took four years, and she still
won't do it when there are other cats in the room!

Remember Kipling's "I am the cat who walks by himself, and all places
are alike to me."

Cantate

Some cats are just not lapcats, Bagheera, who will be 3 in July, is very
affectionate but has never sat on a lap.

Nocturne hates people food and will only sit on my lap if I'm sick and
she wants to be extra nice to me.  Then she'll sit there and purr for
hours.  

Smokey, on the other hand, won't get OFF My damn lap.

--Fil

For a long time, Oscar wouldn't touch my lap.

Then she would only maybe, very skittishly, get on my lap if I had a
blanket covering my legs.

Now she jumps up onto my lap the instant the blanket is in place and
stays put, "surfing" me if I am sleeping.  And she'll even sit on my
bare (well, covered with pants) legs sometimes, if I've just gotten
home from work and she needs to tell me about how starved for
affection she is.

I've had Oscar almost all her life, and she's about 5 now.  All of
these changes have only happened in the last 2 years.

Tawney may change her mind about being a lap cat.  Cats move on their
own mysterious time scales.

Soncek is not a lap sitter unfortunately and he's been with me for 6 and
a half years. He does like to eat a bit of lettuce when I prepare it for
myself.
Best wishes,
Polonca and Soncek

Tomtom, that is an interesting statement.  I had never thought of any of our
cats being or not being lap sitters!  Aggie Marble, never.  She was a feral
cat as a kitten and young cat, she doesn't, and may never do laps.  Victor
and Mr. Pumpkin only do my husband, David's, lap when he is sitting the
lounger leaning back.  Often they will be in his lap together.  No other
laps at any other time.  Our cats don't eat people food either, they don't
want it.

Tawney will come around on her own schedule, that's what cats do!