I was dubious about allowing Nox to write her own quiz after Smokey's
model--however, she has a persusive argument about freedom of speech.
So, after a little discussion about the illegality of hate speech, I
let her write one.  However, I /will/ warn you that the following quiz
is probably speciesist and offensive. :)

Nocturne's Quiz:

1.  How stupid are you?

A.  Regrettably not as smart as the Ruling Cat.
B.  Tragically stupid.
C.  Humanly stupid.
D.  Catastrophically stupid.
E.  I'm not stupid; I'm probably a super genius.

2.  Why are you so stupid?

A.  Because I am not the Ruling Cat.
B.  I was born this way.
C.  *load of garbage about humans having a more highly developed
cerebral cortex*
D.  Just to annoy you, baby.
E.  I said, I'm not stupid.  Are YOU?

3..  How ugly are you?

A.  Ugly next to the Ruling Cat.
B.  I was disfigured.
C.  Ugly in a naked-ape sort of way.
D.  Mind-numbingly hideous.
E.  I'm not ugly, either.  In fact, I may be exceedingly beautiful.

4.  What is your purpose in existence?

A.  To serve the Ruling Cat.
B.  To find a meaning for my life.
C.  To make the world a better place.
D.  To eat food and contemplate the ceiling and waste your oxygen.
E.  To impose my will on the world.

5.  What colour are you?

A.  What colour do you want me to be?
B.  um...pretty ordinary colours....
C.  One of those shades between pale pink and deep brown that could be
called "monkey coloured"
D.  Grey, with a little white tux.
E.  Black.  Blacker than you.

RESULTS:

Mostly A:  You will make an excellent servant.  Email me.  I have work
for you to do.

Mostly B:  God played a cruel trick on you, indeed.  If you stay out of
my way, you will be allowed to continue your pathetic little life.

Mostly C:  You're human.  Worrisome, but not the end of your
world...yet.  You will go to re-education camp and learn to serve me.

Mostly D:  You are Smokey.  Why do you still exist?

Mostly E:  Oh, we have an attitude problem with this one...and I have
the solution.  *unsheathes claws*