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Cat Forum / Cat Anecdotes / July 2004[OT] Everything is Big in Texas
(borrowed from another group) In honor of Australian kangaroos and everything Texas... A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talking. The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, "Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large." Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says, "We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows." The conversation has, meanwhile, almost died when the Texan sees a herd of kangaroos hopping through the field in the distance. Amazed, he asks, "What the hell are those?!" The Aussie replies with an incredulous look, "Don't you have any grasshoppers in Texas?" Jeanne Hedge, as directed by Natasha ============ http://www.jhedge.com > (borrowed from another group) > [quoted text clipped - 15 lines] > The Aussie replies with an incredulous look, "Don't you have any > grasshoppers in Texas?" Reminds me of the joke about the Texan playing golf in Toronto: The Texan spots Ontario Place and asks what's that? His golf partners explain that it's a water front recreation center, with water rides, paddle boats, dining, an IMAX theatre, boat shows, live events, etc. The Texan asks how long it took to build that? The group says three or four years in total. The Texan says "Hell Boy, we woulda built that in three months in Texas". So they play golf a liitle longer and the Texan spots the CN tower and asks what's that? His golf partners explain that it's (past tense) the worlds tallest free standing communication tower, with a revolving restraunt, observation decks, a night club, etc. The Texan again asks, how long long did it take to build that? His golf partners respond, "Don't know, it wasn't there yesterday!" Tigger -- Who does not work for the Toronto Tourist Board. There once was a blind man who decided to visit Texas... When he arrived on the plane, he felt the seats and said, "Wow, these seats are big!" The person next to him answered, "Everything is big in Texas." When he finally arrived in Texas, he decided to visit a bar. Upon arriving in the bar, he ordered a beer and got a mug placed between his hands. He exclaimed, "Wow these mugs are big!" The bartender replied, "Everything is big in Texas." After a couple of beers, the blind man asked the bartender where the bathroom was located. The bartender replied, "Second door to the right." The blind man headed for the bathroom, but accidentally tripped over and skipped the second door. Instead, he entered the third door, which lead to the swimming pool and fell into the pool by accident. Scared to death, the blind man started shouting, "Don't flush, don't flush!" Theresa Stinky Pictures: http://community.webshots.com/album/125591586JWEFwh My Blog: http://www.humanitas.blogspot.com alt.tv.frasier FAQ: http://www.im-listening.net/FAQ/ > In honor of Australian kangaroos and everything Texas... grroooaannn...  SignatureThe One-and-only Holy MosesT |
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