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Cat Forum / Cat Anecdotes / May 2004OT Humor - Notable movie-listing sequences
I was clicking through Comcast's on screen Movie menu to see if anything was on worth watching (nope). But I did notice a lot of notable sequences in the listing. All of these were in the listings, in the given order. My smartass comments follow the sequences: Alien The Perfect Husband Well, some of us are alien enough as it is Texas Chainsaw Massacre A Cop and a Half This is what happens when you don't turn off the chainsaw before trying to hand cuff the perp. And later: Texas Chainsaw Massacre Runaway Jury The jury wants *nothing* to do with this trial, unless the chainsaw is turned *off*. Honey Matrix Revolutions I don't know. This just reminded me of some sort of snack Cheaper By the Dozen Matrix Revolutions The more movies he makes, the more money he saves... The Man Who Wasn't Addicted to His Love A Minute to Pray I suppose he was giving *thanks* that he wasn't addicted. Actually, the title of the first one was an abbreviation of "The Man Who Wasn't There", as shown on the menu. Also a very fine, Cohen Brothers flick. Hollywood Homicide About Schmidt Someone finally got tired of Jack Nicholson's acting. Before and After National Security A comparison of the idyllic days before 9/11 to the days after the Patriot Act. Just Married Chilly Dogs Hollywood Homicide Just because it's your honeymoon, doesn't mean you can put your could feet against her butt. What's Cooking? The Bible Hungry fundamentalists eat soul food. Boys On the Side Excess Baggage More male bashing, what can I say? Absolute Beginners Deadly Intent Unsenet newbies try to take down the network through sheer cluelessness. Hilarity ensues. Ivana Trump's Scorn Don't dump your wife for some chippy, even if you are rich. All that "hell hath no fury" stuff. The first movie was a menu abbreviation of "Ivana Trump's For Love Alone" Beavis and Butthead Welcome to Deathrow Yes! Finally! I will pay money to watch the execution! Body Heat Fireball 500 I am *not* going to ask where the fireball originated, although I did notice that "Ring of Fire" was showing later in the day. How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days Swimming With Sharks Honestly, officer, I told him *not* to swim in Austrian waters. Mars Attacks! Mortal Kombat Yes, they did! Yes, it was! The Secret of NIMH Little Secrets Damn mice kept me up all night, whispering. Peewee's Big Adventure Bend It Like Beckham It Runs In the Family This sound painful. His kink is *not* okay. I hope he doesn't try this in an x-rated movie theater. I am so *not* going to comment on the "runs" part. Star Trek2 Sniper 2 Substitute 4 Toy Story 2 Spykids 3 Sequel Hour. I am just flabbergasted. These really did all follow one another in the menu. Wit Confidence Common Ground I'm The One Now will you sleep with me? Please? Jackass: The Movie Bloodwork Seems like a perfectly logical progression to me... Love Happens In the Company of Men No indication of whether women were involved or not. Step Into Liquid Honey Your kink is okay, but wipe your sticky feet before coming in. Natural Born Killers Felony But only if the scorpions don't get them first. The Final Option The Final Conflict Final Justice Final Now this one just creeps me out. These were on several separate movie channels. Had to be some collusion somewhere. And that is my final word. Mark Edwards -- Proof of Sanity Forged Upon Request >How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days >Swimming With Sharks > Honestly, officer, I told him *not* to swim in Austrian waters. Someone has let sharks loose in the Danube??? Or in the water at Zell-am-See??? Cheers, helen s ;-) --This is an invalid email address to avoid spam-- to get correct one remove fame & fortune h*$el*$$e*nd**$o$ts**i*$*$m*m$o*n*s@$*a$o*l.c**$om$ --Due to financial crisis the light at the end of the tunnel is switched off-- No cluons were harmed when dirtylitterboxofferingstospammers! said > >How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days > >Swimming With Sharks [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > > Cheers, helen s ;-) I forgot to fix that... In another group that I frequent, it is common to misspell Australia as Austria, as a running joke. You do realize, don't you, that fresh-water sharks are twice as venemous as their saltwater cousins? Hugs and Purrs, Mark  SignatureProof of Sanity Forged Upon Request >You do realize, don't you, that fresh-water sharks are twice as >venemous as their saltwater cousins? That'll be the greater-spotted western diamondback shark ;-) I know some sharks are venomous - the spiny-dogfish & the stingrays for a couple I know bull sharks will swim up rivers into freshwater and they will attack humans. True freshwater sharks are much rare though, IIRC. Mind you, the way global warming is going, we do get the odd report of a great white or hammerhead spotted in UK waters :-( Cheers, helen s --This is an invalid email address to avoid spam-- to get correct one remove fame & fortune h*$el*$$e*nd**$o$ts**i*$*$m*m$o*n*s@$*a$o*l.c**$om$ --Due to financial crisis the light at the end of the tunnel is switched off-- >No cluons were harmed when dirtylitterboxofferingstospammers! said >> >How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] >I forgot to fix that... In another group that I frequent, it is common >to misspell Australia as Austria, as a running joke. Someone asked my Aussie ex-BF "Isn't it great to be able to drive to all those other countries?" :0 Theresa My Blog: http://www.humanitas.blogspot.com alt.tv.frasier FAQ: http://www.im-listening.net/FAQ/ "Mark Edwards" <Mark-Edwards@comcast.net> wrote > I was clicking through Comcast's on screen Movie menu to see if > anything was on worth watching (nope). But I did notice a lot of > notable sequences in the listing. All of these were in the listings, > in the given order. My smartass comments follow the sequences: Thanks, Mark, I needed a good laugh. You really had me ROFLing. SignatureMarina, Frank and Nikki Email marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi Pics at http://uk.f1.pg.photos.yahoo.com/frankiennikki >I was clicking through Comcast's on screen Movie menu to see if >anything was on worth watching (nope). But I did notice a lot of >notable sequences in the listing. All of these were in the listings, >in the given order. My smartass comments follow the sequences: ROTFL! Thanks for the belly laughs, Mark! Giinger-lyn > I was clicking through Comcast's on screen Movie menu to see if > anything was on worth watching (nope). But I did notice a lot of > notable sequences in the listing. All of these were in the listings, > in the given order. My smartass comments follow the sequences: LOL thanks for the laughs. All I can say apart from your commentary is that I'm glad I didn't bother to get digital cable. SignatureCheryl > Just Married > Chilly Dogs > Hollywood Homicide > Just because it's your honeymoon, doesn't mean you can > put your could feet against her butt. Or maybe he was eating chili dogs, and the beans got to him? That might be worth killing over. > What's Cooking? > The Bible > Hungry fundamentalists eat soul food. LOL!! > Absolute Beginners > Deadly Intent > Unsenet newbies try to take down the network through > sheer cluelessness. Hilarity ensues. I think that might be the only thing that *can* bring down Usenet! > The Final Option > The Final Conflict [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > movie channels. Had to be some collusion somewhere. And that is > my final word. I've never seen the first 3, but the last one, "Final" was actually an interesting, not very well-known movie. I have no memory of it showing it theaters, but it's not a direct-to-video either. I guess it wasn't much of a hit, but I liked it. (Note: it is a creepy movie, so if you don't like that, don't see this one!) Joyce I love this. Gotta be those programming guys eating lunch together. Sometimes network TV makes me think the writers spend entirely too much time together as well. The odd things that will crop up on different shows and different networks within a few days of each other. Not current events but everyone will start quoting Shakespeare at once or that sort of thing. Or they will all start using some work you never hear in normal conversation. Jo > I was clicking through Comcast's on screen Movie menu to see if > anything was on worth watching (nope). But I did notice a lot of [quoted text clipped - 134 lines] > -- > Proof of Sanity Forged Upon Request Well done Mark! You should suggest this as a contest for the Style Invitational in the Washington Post. See, for example, http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A48674-2004May22.html -Caroline S. > I was clicking through Comcast's on screen Movie menu to see if > anything was on worth watching (nope). But I did notice a lot of [quoted text clipped - 134 lines] > -- > Proof of Sanity Forged Upon Request >I was clicking through Comcast's on screen Movie menu to see if >anything was on worth watching (nope). But I did notice a lot of [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] >The Perfect Husband > Well, some of us are alien enough as it is These are very funny. Suz Macmoosette Thank Heavens There's Only One =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= Waiting for inspiration. Please hold while I contemplate my navel. |\__/| (=':'=) (")_(") |
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